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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

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Posted

About two years ago, it seems,

A gala ball was thrown.

And still it wakes me from my dreams,

Just how much goes unknown.

 

Canid there in Hydrus-dress,

A mowhawk in her fur,

And I was present, I confess,

Dressed up just like her!

 

Too much scotch and too much fun,

And many stories heard,

But when my costume came undone,

I was hit with HOLY WORD!

 

Wyvern was possess'd by foul Fellorous,

And Horiuchi bombed as Orlan,

But he was still belov'd to us!

And then the locust-swarms began...

 

A Pekkle-demon did I give,

To Cery as a gift,

And Wyvern, mind quick as a shiv,

Her pressies tried to lift!

 

Amidst it all, O'Harpy grew,

Exposing half her shank,

And near-before any knew,

O'Harpy... well, she shrank.

 

The locusts kidnapped her, and we-

Although 'twas a fool's quest-

Silexion, Pekkle, and me;

We journeyed there to wrest...

 

Scarlett was their queen, the beast,

And I feared for my life,

I was, you see, to be the feast,

'Til I asked her "Be my wife?"

 

To my surprise she said "I will!"

And we were off that night,

It gets at me, even still,

How little we did fight.

 

She said "You're sweet like cream!"

And she said, "Oh, you're so yummy!"

But still it wakes me in my dreams:

How did I escape her tummy?!

Posted
Yui-chan laughs with the fond remembrance of a spectator, recalling the madness that was that birthday party. In the end, all that was left of the grand Conservatory was a pile of smoldering rubble and a huge debt that Wyvern owed to Gyrfalcon for its reconstruction. I have always wondered, blue one, just what did happen between you and Scarlett after the marriage. Perhaps you'll answer the question for us, one day. She grins and wanders away, awash in memories.
Posted

Yui-chan:

 

While I would like to discuss the matter of my brief relationship with Ms. O'Harpy; she has at her disposal an army of Undead Ninja Lawyers, not to mention a formidable set of mandibles. I have only Bob, and while he is a ninja, he is neither undead nor legally savvy. The contract that I was required to sign upon our 'dissolvement' prevents me from describing any and all details about the marriage.

 

Several times in the past, I have attempted to find loopholes in the post-nup, but always I failed. Perhaps in another fifty years, when Scarl- excuse me, Ms. O'Harpy has decided to stop tormenting me, the full truth will be known.

 

Until then, I'll have Bob bake you some peanut-butter and chocolate-chip twists. He's quite good at them, and tends to not poison anything with chocolate in it, as it is a particular weakness of his.

 

Cincerely Yours,

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