A little blue house

[Damon Inferel]

Just as I did with my flower poem, I picked another random topic. I don't exactly say anything about my beloved, in fact I say nothing at all, but she is always my inspiration. Here it is, and try not to get confused... I already did...

 

There was a little blue house on the beach,

A remote place beyond humanity’s reach.

It now sits lonely, the paint beginning to wear.

The shutters on loose hinges, beginning to tear.

Several occupants in its long past,

A dreamy place where the summers last.

The weather has came and gone again,

Holding no care for the creation of men.

The tides have risen innumerable times,

The wind assisting the melody of chimes.

Crystal and steel and glass once rang together,

Seagulls gathering to preen a feather.

The house has sat, holding its own,

It’s boards like its memories, both creak and moan.

The support pillars holding fast in the sand,

The windows still polished to survey the land.

A confusing little house that sits on the beach,

Forever forgotten by humanity’s reach.

 

I don't get it either, but it was one in the morning... and I was feeling poetic and rhymey...

[Peredhil]

You have a neato grasp of showing a scene and embedding a feeling in it.

 

Do you think maybe that:

The weather has came and gone again

should be:

The weather has come and gone again

?

 

Well done.

[Damon Inferel]

Oh, forgive me... It was one in the morning, and I may have been feeling poetic, but my grammar must have been terrible... I have a bit of a problem with changing the original though, so I pray you can excuse the fact my poem will not change... Thank you for the review though.

[Ayshela]

(nod) i noticed that one, and "It's boards" should be "Its boards" - the apostrophe not being a possessive in this case.

 

Aside from what could as easily be typographical errors, i do very much like this. You have a gift for creating a verbal painting, complete with brush strokes, motion and mood. Very impressive!