whynotsin Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 At night I lay Looking up at the stars Making friends with shadows The sweet sound of owls rocking me to sleep The soft breeze takes me to places unseen. Merrily I lay Whispering softly to the wind. Telling her to stay O what a delicious life To live in this moment To breathe the night To reminisce about the day The thought of just sinking into sleep, To be taken away to a never land To wield a mighty sword And romance a pure maiden Yes this is a wonderful moment A moment in which my heart jumps at the thought Yes to escape for just the night Into vast unending lands
Nyyark Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 I like it, its non linear structure gave me the feeling of being lulled in a trance. I also really like the concept. Really cool.
Zariah Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 The style of this reminds me a bit of Walt Whitman. I like the parallel structure. It feels like a whimsical tone. Great!
Archaneus Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 I don't have anything to compare this to myself but good work.
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