Tasslehoff Posted February 25, 2003 Report Share Posted February 25, 2003 These tears flow from my eyes, They only carry saddness and depression, Bringing out a storm raging from with-in, Waking up from another falsified dream session, Thoughts of you brigning upon me another idea of sin.. Lately, Days come and go, Like the moon and stars, Here one minute, gone the next, So often you seem to cross into my mind, Again causing these fultile tears to flow.. Eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaneus Posted February 25, 2003 Report Share Posted February 25, 2003 Hey Tass. I think you did a good job on this one. I like how you refered to nature. Good work as always Tass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaeha Posted February 25, 2003 Report Share Posted February 25, 2003 Very nice... I'm afraid I can't do much when it comes to critiquing... I'm a lyrical sort of person, as I'm sure you've noticed, so when people write in free verse, there's not much I can say. But hey! It seems good to me, and that's got to count for something, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoomGaze Posted February 26, 2003 Report Share Posted February 26, 2003 Tass, your title is true in a sense, I can see you put rdm things in, but all in all, it actually makes sense, and it is pretty good.. short and quite depressing i might add : keep writing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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