Peredhil Posted February 13, 2003 Report Posted February 13, 2003 Once there was a man who was forgetful so he forgot himself. Once there was a man who thought everyone had flaws so he accepted them. Once there was a man who felt others' pain without being overwhelmed so he could listen. Once there was a man who saw what others could be clearly so he cheered their growth. Once there was a man who needed others so he might know who he was.
Archaneus Posted February 13, 2003 Report Posted February 13, 2003 I don't know why but I really like this one. Great Job.
Vlad Posted February 14, 2003 Report Posted February 14, 2003 Good epithet. I also like how you make the reader feel for this person, yet smile at the same time. Another good one Peredhil. You don't write often, but when you write, oh boy. You seem to be the Yui of poetry.
Scarlett O'Harpy Posted February 14, 2003 Report Posted February 14, 2003 Once there was a man who was forgetful so he forgot himself. But others remembered Once there was a man who thought everyone had flaws so he accepted them. And they accepted themselves Once there was a man who felt others' pain without being overwhelmed so he could listen. Now others learn to listen Once there was a man who saw what others could be clearly so he cheered their growth. And they grew stronger Once there was a man who needed others so he might know who he was. A friend Harpy
Gyrfalcon Posted February 15, 2003 Report Posted February 15, 2003 Gyrfalcon cheers both Peredhil and Cerulean! Excellent work, Peredhil, and a great response, Cerulean.
Cyril Darkcloud Posted February 15, 2003 Report Posted February 15, 2003 Juat a few quick thoughts based on post and responses: Can it be that forgetting is the secret of finding? Is it, perhaps, that standing oneself in the pain of another is the essence of listening, and the embracing of flaws the beginning of mending? Maybe, then, it is only aiding the growth of another which opens the way to that beautiful and curious finding where one rediscovers the good in a life that had first been forgotten. A very fine piece of writing. It is not often that one has occasion to describe the structure of a poem as gentle in its simplicity, but that seems an apt description in this case. *Applauds as politely as he can *
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