Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Report Posted January 30, 2003 El Jakob Initiate Posts: 13 (9/7/01 11:21:47 am) Reply Alternate Definitions -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Washington Post published a contest for readers in which they were asked to supply alternate meanings for various words. The following were the winning entries: Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam. 0yster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there. And let's add ..... Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Zool47 Elder Posts: 74 (9/11/01 1:36:57 am) Reply Re: Alternate Definitions -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oy! ~Zool~ Elder of Elders, The Pen is Mightier than the Sword. Bard of Terra, Patron Saint of Aspiring Bards. Elder than dirt, more foolish than a jester, able to trip over the smallest logic in a single step. It's... Oh, you know.
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Cerulean Quill-Bearer Posts: 28 (9/12/01 9:36:41 am) Reply Re: Alternate Definitions -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I loved these! More please!
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