Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Report Posted January 30, 2003 El Jakob Initiate Posts: 9 (9/5/01 9:25:28 am) Reply Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Okay, now this may not have a place here... but what the hay... Dear Diary: May 30th: Just moved back to Houston, Now this is a city that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park lying on a blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally made it back home. I love it here. June 14th: Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper. June 30th: Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing for me. Another scorcher today,but I love it here. July 10th: The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? At least it's kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat and humidity is taking longer that I expected. July 15th: Fell asleep by the pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body.) Missed 2 days of work, what a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this. July 20th: I missed Morgan (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got to the hot car for lunch, Morgan had swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and exploded all over the $2,000 leather upholstery. I told the kids that she ran away. The car now smells like Kibbles and SHITS. No more pets in this heat. July 25th: The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts. July 30th: Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. $1,500 in damn house payments and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here? Aug. 4th: It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down a little, but this freaking humidity makes the house feel like it's about 90. Stupid repairman pissed in my pool. I hate this stupid city. Aug. 8th: If another wise ass cracks, "Hot enough for you today?", I'm going to tear his throat out. Damn heat. By the time I get to work the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like a dead cat!! Aug. 9th: Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and sat on the black leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my ass was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and ass. Now my car smells like burnt ass and fried cat. Aug. 10th: The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do any frigging for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this barren damn desert?? Water rationing will be next, so $1700 worth of cactus just might dry up and blow into the damn pool. Even the cactus can't live in this heat. Aug. 14th: Welcome to HELL!!! Temperature got to 113 today. Forgot to crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $1500 house payment to bail me out of jail. Frigging TEXANS!!!!
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 peredhil31 Elder of Lists and Manners Posts: 143 (9/5/01 12:03:22 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peredhil tries to keep a Politely straight face to applaud Jakob's diary, but finally, after twitching and contorting, he bursts into laughter. Finally he almost gets himself under control. "Tha-that's funny! I can relate to the heat! And the humidity." "Poor kitty-cat." Peredhil begins snickering again and has to hastily leave.
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Gyrfalcon25 Bard Posts: 26 (9/5/01 8:22:44 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *Gyr laughed at everything but the cat bit.* =)
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Zool47 Elder Posts: 69 (9/6/01 6:38:55 am) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- He he he he... I think it's hilarious! ~Zool~ Elder of Elders, The Pen is Mightier than the Sword. Bard of Terra, Patron Saint of Aspiring Bards. Elder than dirt, more foolish than a jester, able to trip over the smallest logic in a single step. It's... Oh, you know.
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Cheye69 Page Posts: 29 (9/10/01 3:45:23 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How very true. Very funny, although it makes me wonder on past conversations that I have had with the opposite sex...How much of it was mere fabrication with the barest thread of the truth intermixed?
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Zool47 Elder Posts: 73 (9/11/01 1:35:17 am) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- He he he. You really don't want to know We don't see things as they are. We see things as we are. -Anais Nin ~Zool~ Elder of Elders, The Pen is Mightier than the Sword. Bard of Terra, Patron Saint of Aspiring Bards. Elder than dirt, more foolish than a jester, able to trip over the smallest logic in a single step. It's... Oh, you know.
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 DoctorEvil65 Herald Posts: 33 (9/11/01 4:54:10 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Doctor hates Houston...actually Texas in general.....it redefines humidity Sincerely, DoctorEvil
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Cerulean Quill-Bearer Posts: 27 (9/12/01 8:36:39 am) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wimps!
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 Ozymandias the Elder Founder Posts: 32 (9/12/01 4:32:48 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I just wanted to thank you again for posting this, Jakob. It really does help break a grim mood. :>) (Of course, listening to Benny Goodman *while* reading your stuff is frickin' great!)
Archive Posted January 30, 2003 Author Report Posted January 30, 2003 El Jakob Quill-Bearer Posts: 20 (12/14/01 12:35:16 pm) Reply Re: Reflections on moving back home... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BAH! Benny Goodman? Try Roy D. Mercer.... particularly "How Big'A Boy Are Ya?" Of course, you may abandon reading altogether after listening to the whole thing....
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