Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Report Posted January 15, 2003 Rahsash Geldich Weenie Awardee Posts: 174 (11/17/02 5:03:28 pm) Reply Paradox -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease PLEASE!!!!!!!! Tell me what you think of my new piece
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Gyrfalcon25 Bard Posts: 629 (11/17/02 11:09:28 pm) Reply Re: Paradox -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oops. We've been bad and posted responses below the piece itself. Anyway, I'll just put a short analysis here. First, I was a bit surprised to find out he was a Phoenix- I thought he was a fallen angel or something similar. (The titles such as 'The Destroyer' and 'Lord of the Night' helped this impression.) Usually, Phoenix are not winged humanoids. This was also helped along by the mermaid being a priestess as well- after all, a love between a fish and a bird is similar to one between a being of darkness and one of light. (A love that almost never occurs.) Overall, the story is quite sad- Tirand loses the love of his life, and no matter how complete his victory, he will have lost his heart. One question I have is what is the meaning of the glowing blue blood. Is it the Phoneix's blood? The point of the blood sort of lost me. The flashbacks are well done and are touching. All in all, it's an excellent story- do you plan to continue it?
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Rahsash Geldich Weenie Awardee Posts: 179 (11/22/02 7:40:49 pm) Reply Re: Paradox -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The blue blood was her lifeblood, the bond they share with water being the last thing that her kind part with before they die. When they bleed blue, death is near. As to finishing it, I am not sure but I will try. The idea of Eterini and Tirand has been floating around in my brain for a while now and I jsut never really found a good place to put them. The hardest place about them is although they are rich in character, they were each sombinations of several ideas, so I must sort out how to arrange the story around them. The humaniod concept is another one I've been working on for a while. One of the bits for this I gathered form the idea of different humanoid races fighting. As for the Phoenix was somethign I used because its part of his history, his title, and reason for Sacrifice. I had to let the reader know his reasons also, that she, his fish, was his release. I think the biggest part about the paradox is that with it being a paradox, ther isn't a solution, and really can't be. Its similar to Romeo & Juliet in that faction. I will attempt to work on it however. Andy more comments are extremely welcome, and any confusion I will attempt to clear up in an edited version
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