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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

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Posted

Ozymandias the Elder

The Founder

Posts: 629

(4/30/02 5:22:43 pm)

Reply Bird in spring

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Tell me, M'lady Canid, why is optimism so shocking?? ;>)

 

Myself, I enjoyed it greatly. The deeper meaning is easily found, and I think you made a very nice foil to the somber nature of your message with the almost silly way you phrased it. The phrasing added terrific emphasis, too because you got this reader thinking of important worries and smiling (read that as embracing hope) at the same time.

 

I especially loved the end.

 

TWEET!

Posted

Canid

Initiate

Posts: 41

(7/25/02 6:52:38 am)

Reply Re: Bird in spring

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*Canid grins.* Posting comments on my poetry three months before I have access to where they are posted... I feel honored!

 

It is not the optimism of the poem that disgusted me - personally I really don't like depressing poems - it was just the overly mushy style "You're a bird in spring" phrase... it is not the sort of thing I'm used to writing.

 

I am glad you enjoyed it though... and I no longer feel doubtful about whether I should have posted it. It is interesting how often the phrasing seems to be appropriate unintentionally... I suppose it just sounds right as I write it and I don't think on why.

 

I felt it necessary to add the TWEET to escape from the mushiness of the rest...

*Eleanor glides overhead and tweets... Canid gives her a look.*

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