Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Report Posted January 15, 2003 peredhil31 An Ancient Polite Bard Posts: 933 (2/19/02 7:56:04 pm) Reply ezSupporter Critic's Corner Contest -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peredhil comes in and clears his throat. A challenge has been issued, the Gauntlet thrown! Given a word, or two word phrase, there shall be a Poetic write-off. The time will start with this Post. The final entries must be posted her, labelled in the Subject Line: Critic's Corner Contest Entry (to avoid confusion with any Role Playing or Smack-Talking posts). The Contest Entries are due by Friday the 22nd of February, 9:00 PM (21:00) West Coast Time. That's Midnight, (0000) East Coast Time. Judging will be done by all the Pen Membership, Present and Past, Page and Higher. Votes are due in by 9:00 PM Sunday. The Elder of Lists will tally the Votes and post the results in the Cabaret. In this Corner, Gestures to the left, is Cheyenne! Over on this side, Gestures to the right, Excedrin. Let the contest begin, the Topic Phrase (Creativity should count) is: Morning Star
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 peredhil31 An Ancient Polite Bard Posts: 940 (2/21/02 6:19:45 am) Reply ezSupporter Critic's Corner Contest -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peredhil watches as the Contestants scurry off to their corners, mumbling such rhyming words as defenistrate and Hooter's wet bar. The parchments begin to mount in discarded piles and broken Quills are thrown without regard of bystanders as the two dig into their projects. The crowd are loving it as the tension mounts. Wyvern has already hired cheap child labor to sell concessions, literally paying the small pink elephants with peanuts. Tzimfemme has set up a lawn chair and is lazily watching the Contest, sipping on a Hot Chocolate and watching Orlan strut back and forth with the large cue cards which announced the passing time and his telephone number. Occasional "Yo Momma" and "You so Fat" comments sling back and forth between the contestants, sizzling and scorching the air and an occasional Initiate too slow to move out of the way. The Ancients perch like silvering ravens along the grandstand box-seating, providing color commentary...
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 excedrin Page Posts: 24 (2/21/02 9:23:44 pm) Reply Critic's Corner Contest Entry -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (This message was left blank) Edited by: excedrin at: 3/20/02 6:19:55 pm Moderator's note: Unfortunately, excedrin (Kinslayer, Dragcor Warwick, et al) went through and deleted nearly everyone of his posts. Given that the remaining ones were mostly plagarized, one can only wonder what this entry was. To be just, he did have a few very original works, unique to him.
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Cheye69 Quill-Bearer Posts: 67 (2/22/02 8:01:56 am) Reply Critic's Corner Contest Entry -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The truth unfolds leaving me cold A child’s trust broken by one selfish soul A bright beautiful mind twisted with rage So sad it would seem he is just 7 years of age I cried for 3 hours trying to find a way To heal his hurts make the pain go away I called my mom family friends and alike None could do more than nod, be polite It hurts to know I have been so wrong Not trusted and listened as goes the song How did I not see a problem of this size? That a stranger would have to call tears in her eyes To tell me of the plight of my very own son I shudder to think of what I have become He was afraid to tell me he said last night That I would not listen we would just fight I prayed with all my heart this night To find the way to do what is right To bring my child back to the fold To snuggle him up bring peace to his soul It was miraculous that is all I can contend Outside a pane above my bed was the star sent by a friend The one that could comfort, shed light, lead the way It was winking down at me, brought light to my day For the first time since hearing the phrase I have understood not just been in a daze Thank you, my bright beautiful Morning Star.
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Cheye69 Quill-Bearer Posts: 68 (2/22/02 11:39:36 am) Reply What happened? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Excedrin, Why did you cahnge you poem entry?
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 excedrin Page Posts: 25 (2/22/02 12:02:41 pm) Reply Re: What happened? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i never really liked the other one and just finished this one today and decided i liked it more
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 peredhil31 An Ancient Polite Bard Posts: 946 (2/22/02 8:43:03 pm) Reply ezSupporter Entries received, the voting begins -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peredhil nods as he clicks the stop watch. Carefully checking the formats, he notes that each Contestant has indeed submitted a valid final entry. With the temptation to ask, "Is this your Final Answer?" held firmly in cheek with his tongue, he opens the floor to the voting. 0) The Contestants may not vote for themselves or each other. 1) All membership ranked Page through Ancient may Vote once each. 2) All may comment or commentary, to include the Contestants and Initiates. Peredhil ducks back out of the way, and Orlan struts through with a large queue card bearing the words: Vote Now! The women in the audience vote by throwing their clothing at the Sexy Sexy Elder, who merely accepts it as his rightful due. Edited by: peredhil31 at: 2/24/02 7:18:59 am
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Nyyark Page Posts: 21 (2/23/02 6:44:45 pm) Reply Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- One vote for Cheye. Great poem both of you.
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Lady Celes Crusader Quill-Bearer Posts: 159 (2/23/02 10:13:22 pm) Reply Re: Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Celes arrives at the poll and reads Orlan's signs. Her eyes narrows, her mouth pouts and her cheecks reddens. - "Its not because I speak French that I wear French lingerie!", replies the infuriated Café owner, "I wont pay any piece of lingerie for my voting right." The little Frenchie reads both poem and seems to be surprised by Excedrin's entry. She remember that he entered another poem that was lovely. - "This one is nice too but not as touching as the other was.", comments Celes. After a long moment of hesitation, she finally made up her mind. She reluctantly appraoches Pere and Orlan with her voting bulletin. Pere reads it and notes it. When Orlan asks for her clothes, she gives a "Don't-even-think-about-it" stares and Pere decides that it was wiser for Orlan to not go on. Celes leaves the place still clothed. Vote for: Cheye.
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Wyvern00 Elder of Initiates Posts: 424 (2/24/02 12:25:26 am) Reply Re: Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wyvern steps down from his bookie gambling booth and picks up a ballad, reading the two poems written over the front and considering which empty check box he should check... The first was a wonderfull little love piece by Excedrin, which followed a perfect rhyme scheme and ended with a genuinly excellent finish. A heart felt poem. The second was a poem by his beloved Cheyenne, and clearly expressed some of the sincerest emotion he had seen poetry wise in quite some time. He felt the pain, the frustration, the hope and friendship... Clearly, this was a heart felt poem as well... A very heart felt poem, in fact. With a slight hesitation as he enjoyed both of the poems tremendously, Wyvern eventually decides to check the box beside Cheye's poem. Satisfied with his decision, he hand in the ballet and heads back to his bookie gambling booth, once again taking votes. (My vote goes to Cheyenne's poem.) [image]http://members.shaw.ca/kea/am/wyvy.jpg[/image] ------------------------------ Almost a Dragon... "My life is one big crime, I try to scheme through it." -Common, "The 6th Sense" Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze. Edited by: Wyvern00 at: 2/24/02 12:26:39 am
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 Ozymandias the Elder The Founder Posts: 388 (2/25/02 2:48:54 pm) Reply Re: Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ozymandias runs a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. Hmmm. Looking back down at the ballot, his brows knit together in thought as he places the point of his quill squarely between the two conestants' names. On the one hand, Cheyenne's is much more evocative of strong emotion. On the other, Excedrin's is more direct, clearer. Cheye has a very intricate story of a very small but very painful episode of life. Excedrin paints a very familiar picture to many, one of very specific faith and hope. Yet it is that most universal faith, in its' simplest form: love. There are underpinnings that could easily be read into each, but barring those... Cheyenne loads for bear in intensity, but Excedrin has empathy. Nodding almost imperceptibly, he lifts his quill, dips it into his inkwell, and scratches a swift check mark. Excedrin.
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 gwaihir1 Elder of Lists and Poetry Posts: 122 (2/26/02 10:38:39 am) Reply Re: Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gwaihir hurries in "Well the votes took a while to count guys, so there's been a delay, but now it looks offical (unless anyone wants to demand a recount) Cheye:3 Excedrin:1 "Cheyenne, I think that means you have officially won. As prize, I give you a Pineapple"! Pulls one out of a bag too small to fit one in, and hands it to Cheye Moves as if to leave, but then stops undecidedly and mutters to himself, but I can't leave Excedrin without a pineapple either. Hmm "Excedrin, for having written what is also a very nice poem, I award you a Pineapple"! Pulls another one out of said bag Stops to think a moment Heck!, I can't leave anyone out! Begins to hand pineapples out to everyone in the room Edited by: Orlan at: 2/26/02 11:19:39 am
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 gwaihir1 Elder of Lists and Poetry Posts: 123 (2/26/02 10:40:36 am) Reply Re: Vote -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (now WHY did my italics not work? They've always worked before when I did them that way!) ---------- I want to be page 93 of Pineapples, the Avian Crows-Nyyark
Archive Posted January 15, 2003 Author Report Posted January 15, 2003 peredhil31 An Ancient Polite Bard Posts: 958 (2/26/02 11:59:02 am) Reply ezSupporter Rah! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Orlan rushes in, as the Elder of Lists gasps out his plea. A fanfare of trumpets, the whisk of a Pen, and the italics magically appear. A peasant with a low neanderthal forehead and a single eyebrow stretching across his face masticates his cud as he scratchs the dry soil with a stick. Who were that there sexy sexy man?
Recommended Posts