Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Racouol Call me crazy but I do not think Joat will like that. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Joat116 You know... I see this in movies all the time. They always try to put the thing out and burn themselves. Why don't they just pull out the fuse? *So saying Joat does just that and walks away* ------------------ Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Bard of Terra
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 xenoberyll *was that a glint of intelligence in joat's actions?!...may he be a traitor?* *did we just say this aloud?!* ~seeing an angry joat coming his way xenoberyll quickly opening another gate, leaps in and disappears~ ------------------ xenoberyll *disappearing in a cloud of mist* *leaving a trail of laughter*
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Racouol "Joat is a Traitor?!?!?! Attack!!" Racouol then tosses his flashlight and pulls out two frying pans. He then preceaded to beat Joat with them. After a while Racouol stopped and noticed that his frying pans were all banged up(Joat must have a really hard head). Seeing this Racouol started running so that he would not have to face Joats wrath. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 joat116 (A note to newbies reading this) It took me many years to inspire this much fear. If you work hard and buy my book "How to be like Joat" you too can send people fleeing with a mere glance. IC: Wait! Betty Crocker! Come back! I want some muffins... bring me bannnnnannnnna muffins!!! (Note: Racoul is really Betty Crocker. That's where he gets all the frying pans) ------------------ Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Bard of Terra
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Racouol "I am not Betty Crocker. Yes I may be able to cook but I am not Betty Crocker. She is the one that fights with a rolling pin." Racouol reaches into his pocket and pulls out a mace. He then started a fury of swings at Joat. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 joat116 Unfortuantely in his clumsy effort to disguise the fact that he's betty crocker Racoul chose a weapon he was not familair with (that being anyone not from a kitchen) and ended up unconcious on the floor with no pants on. ------------------ Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Bard of Terra
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 brute A traitor?!!? Where? *Brute swings his head about, frantically looking for a gleam of intelligence in any set of eyes. He sees a rather inept-looking mage pointing at Joat* "Are you insane? Why, Joat is clearly among the most stupid of all idiots gathered," brute yells to the fellow. Scratching his head, Brute considers his words. "Well," he says," next to me, that is." Content that the matter is settled, Brute seats himself and watches the festivities unfold as Racouol and Joat demonstrate the lethal effects of several different flashlights pounding upon unwary heads. Man, were those Smart People in for it!! Brute, Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 brute Brute addresses the Idiots. "Ahem. Idiots! After a long and exhaustive search, I have finally found a target. I have discovered the existence of a Smart Person!!! Prepare all flashlights for the total destruction of this vile person. Let it be known that Zool has shown undoubtable proof to be a Smartie! Turn 'em on, boys, cause we've finally found a Smart one!" Cheers arise from the Idiots as Brute raises his shiny Flashlight above his head and waves to the crowd. Brute, Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Racouol Racouol wakes up to find that he has no pants on. "ok, who is the wise guy who took my pants?" He sees someone trying to put one pant leg over his head. "Hey, those are mine." Racouol grabs one of his rather dented frying pans and proceeded to beat the man with it. Now if he could only remember how they were suppose to go on. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Swordmage *Grog immediately whips out his trusty warclub and hammers away at that vile, intelligent person - only stopping when the stool lies in pieces on the floor, not moving at all. He grins satisfied.* One smartie down, boss. Next?
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 P51mus Yeah! Get Zool! He talks and my head starts to hurt! *pulls out his flashlight* *fiddles around with the dials, knobs, levers and buttons on his flashlight* *a nearby stool turns into a radish* Hmmmmm ------------------ -P51mus The Schizophrenic Mage Friend of Bob the stone golem Server 1 P51mus WHACK (ARS) suicide guild Ager Server 1 Slavik The Brotherhood of Nod Blitz Server II P51mus The Order of Storms And isn't sanity really just a one trick pony anyway? I mean, all you get is one trick! Rational thinking. But when you're good and crazy, oooh!! The sky's the limit! -The Tick Fate is like a caged gorilla. It will pelt you with dung if you mock it. -Warriv (Diablo 2)
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Jagged Did I hear somebody was missing their pants? Where? Where? All well I'll just go back to the corner and go back to sleep. And where did all this toast come from. stopping to pick some up and eat it* YUCK tastes like gasoline. Hey did anybody here that?............
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Snypiuer A mighty "hmmphth" all turn to see a tattered figure astride a magnificent beast. It is Snypiuer. After a long and mystic journey that has spanned generations, Snypiuer believes that his goal is within reach. His travels have taken him far. His name is revered and hated throughout the land. He is known as an angel and a demon. A savior and a destroyer. His tales are many and may someday be told. But, for now, this moment is the most important. For Snypiuer has heard of a kingdom which overflows with flashlights. He approaches the court yard of a rather old castle. Within are boxes upon boxes of what Snypiuer can only hope is what he is looking for. Around the boxes run the fattest most well fed chickens anyone has ever seen. A small child comes from around the corner of one towering stack of cartons. He yells, "Pappa! Pappa! A stranger approaches!" Snypiuer says, "Be calm my child and tell me of whose kingdom I am in." The small boy replies, "Noble sir, my great great great grandfather will be here shortly. He is the last of our great lord's original servants. Our master left many years ago in search of a holy item that would save all of Terra. He has not returned. But, we know that someday he will. Until then, we feed the chickens and store the clubs that continue to arrive to arm our soldiers." Snypiuer looks at the cartons and realizes that, yes indeed, they are not but MagLite brand clubs. Slowly Snypiuer turns, his sources hav=d been wrong. This was obviously the kingdom of some brave soul, who like Snypiuer had gone on a quest. Most likely, he was dead if he had not returned in so long. Mounting [beauregard and riding off, Snypiuer says over his shoulder, "Your master must be a great man, fear not and never give up hope. One day he shall return. Fairwell young lad and give your great great great grandfather all the help you can. Honor him and you shall honor your master." At this, an ancient man slowly hobbles around the corner of a stack of boxes. He hears what he believes to be a familiar voice. Unable to see all that well, he can barely whisper out, "Boss?!" As Snypiuer, upon his trusty steed Beauregard, sets out once again in search of a flashlight. Beauregard lets out a mighty, "hmmmphth" as they leave the court yard several hours later. ------------------ Snypiuer Bard of Terra Demi-God of Suicide Squirrel Squadrons
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Jagged Did someone say betty crocker, are we fixing to eat? I'm starved.I hope its muffins I love muffins.. Hey what is that smell???? Squeaker was that you??? Gee whizzzz... got to get out of here, man that smell is funky!! *stepping over bloody, mutilated, half naked flash light thingy* jagged( got name because of the two foot long jagged knife he carries) walks to the door holding nose, passes out in front of door(Blocking the doors from opening) I think the paint on the walls are starting to peel. ------------------ So far gone don't know when I'll be back.
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Destructo "Hey brute my flashlight isn`t working" Destructo exclaims as he is seen pushing buttons on what appears to be a cellular phone. "All is does is beep and has people saying things i don`t understand." says Destructo.
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 brute try fixing it with a hammer. A good hammer'll fix ANYTHING!!!! try that, then if it still doesnt work, get a new flashlight. I recommend something shiny... Brute, Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 MindMaster *Looks at everyone sparingly* "You fools! You can not defeat are evil side of dark and INTELIGENT ways. Get out of my kingdom of evil, or I and the rest of the Master Revolution shall surly destroy you!
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Tzimfemme and Rydia All the idiots try to look up from the shiny stickers to gawp at the so-called Smart Person. How rude! He isn't even paying proper respect to the shinies. Unable to break away, they just shine their flashlights in the right direction. Screaming, howling, buzzing, injuring, and generally caring not at all for pretensions of immortality, the Stupid Newbies celebrate! ------------------ Tzimfemme (the naked mage of Server One) Proud member of Calculus for the Masses! Honoree of "Nekkid Mages #1 Fan Club and Worshippers" Rydia adorned with pearls Immortal of Carp Bestower of Holy Power upon Demigods Constant Reader and Moderator, Blitz One Sossity of Ager One Angels of Apocalypse Constant Reader and Moderator
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 MindMaster MindMaster has a headache! ------------------ Evil unite in my own enternal Hell's Fire ~MindMaster (Leader of the Master Revolution)
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 P51mus begins randomly pressing buttons and levers on his "flashlight" (P51mus uses item "Infinite Improbability Device" is on Mindmaster) Mindmaster turns into a small radish, which, luckily for mind master, has arms, legs and eyes, though nothing to hurt anyone with (Mindmaster turns into mutant Radish, P51mus finishes using Infinite Improbability Device) ------------------ -P51mus The Schizophrenic Mage Friend of Bob the stone golem Warper of Reality Server 1 P51mus WHACK (ARS) suicide guild Ager Server 1 Slavik The Brotherhood of Nod Blitz Server II P51mus The Order of Storms And isn't sanity really just a one trick pony anyway? I mean, all you get is one trick! Rational thinking. But when you're good and crazy, oooh!! The sky's the limit! -The Tick Fate is like a caged gorilla. It will pelt you with dung if you mock it. -Warriv (Diablo 2)
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Jagged Hey anybody for a salad?... Looking at a rather funny looking radish running around the floor. Hey, where's betty crocker he'll know what to do!!!! *looking at joat* *still wondering what everybody is doing walking around looking at the back of eveyone elses head* I'm hungry!!!!!!!!!!! ------------------ So far gone don't know when I'll be back.
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Severan *Severan looks upon the swarms of idiots from his castle's scrying mirrors*. "Oh my. The idiots have assembled in force there. This is not good." Contemplating for a second, Severan comes up with the answer. "Ted!" Severan calls, and then he sits and waits. The lanky young apprentice comes into the room and promptly trips. Severan shakes his head; out of all his apprentices, only Ted finished with a 20% or lower on all his magic tests. "Yes, sir?". Severan glances at the apprentice. "I have a delivery I want you to make". "Yes Sir!" says Ted. Severan stands up, and walks to a corner of his old room. Opening an ancient box labeled in Old World text, the words 'DANGER' are transcribed over the box. Inside the box, high power machine guns, with massive carbines, are sitting in the box. Severan hands three of them to Ted. "Send these 'flashlights' to the group in the middle of... 431 market street. Do you see the big troll here?" Severan points into the mirror. "Yeah?" says Ted. "Tell him that if he holds this "flashlight" and hits people with it, it'll make a flashing light from the hole." Ted nods, and Severan sighs in relief: while Ted's arcane knowledge bordered on infidelity, his memory and loyalty was unrivaled. "Do you see the drooling demi-god, the one staring at the shiny stickers?" Ted nods. "Give a flashlight to him, and tell him if he spins in circles and pushes the button here," Severan points at the trigger. "Betty Crocker will start making bananna muffins. Tell him it only works if the hole here," Severan points to the hole at the end of the carbine. "is pointing away from him." Severan thinks for a second; What should he do with the last 'flashlight'? Finally, after a few minutes of contemplation, he comes up with the answer. "After you give those two the flashlights, give any female at the gathering the last "Flashlight" and tell her it's..." Severan thinks hard. "a really good pleasure thingie, if she makes sure it goes hole first into 'the hole'. Inform her that it turns on by pressing the button here." Severan points at the trigger. "Got that Ted?" "Yes sir, I..." Ted drivels on, quoting Severan's words and exactly who to give the 'flashlights' to. "Yes, good man. Now go!" Severan opens a rift, and shoves Ted through it. Snickering loudly, Severan rallies his archangels, and orders them to line up on the defense, should the newbies ever figure out how to get the portals to work.
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 P51mus P51mus begins using his "flashlight" again (P51mus uses "infinite improbability device" randomly) At that exact moment, Ted arrives just outside the hall,bh nad unknown forces gather around him ("Infinite Improbability Device" focuses it's power on Ted) Ted turns into a turnip (with legs, though he's clumsy now), the box of weaponry turns into a salad shooter (Infinite Improbability device turns Ted into a turnip, box of weaponry turns into a salad shooter. P51mus finishes using the Unique item Infinite Improbability Device) P51mus is confused My flashlight didn't do anything this time.... ------------------ -P51mus The Schizophrenic Mage Friend of Bob the stone golem Warper of Reality Server 1 P51mus WHACK (ARS) suicide guild Ager Server 1 Slavik The Brotherhood of Nod Blitz Server II P51mus The Order of Storms And isn't sanity really just a one trick pony anyway? I mean, all you get is one trick! Rational thinking. But when you're good and crazy, oooh!! The sky's the limit! -The Tick Fate is like a caged gorilla. It will pelt you with dung if you mock it. -Warriv (Diablo 2)
Guest Minta Rose Posted January 18, 2002 Report Posted January 18, 2002 Brute Brute hears the reply of an Idiot over the din of confused voices. "Salad! I want a salad!" Brute, being an Idiot of the first order, found this suggestion to be agreeable. Blinking his eyes, he managed to look away from the shiny sticker on the back of another Idiot's head. His eyes were soon focused on the incredibly large turnip and the salad shooter. "Mmmm...tangy tossed turnip salad! My favorite!" Pulling forth a pair of wooden spoons, Brute began to chase the turnip. The possibility that this was odd in the most extreme way imagined never occured to Brute, as he was an Idiot of the first order. "Someone help corner that clumsy turnip!" Brute yelled to the milling Idiots.
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