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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

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Guest Signe Green
Posted

in the roleplaying game I'm playing my character is insane and she's writing a book- it's entirely in limericks and it's about how many ways she can find to kill a man. I was hoping to coax a few limericks out of you kind people that I can pass off as hers strictly for ingame use. http://www.themightypen.net/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.gif) anyone interested?

Signe's Homepage

Posted

Skew him, brew him, quick and sly

Glue him, screw him, don't be shy

For you'll be surprised at the many fashions

In which a man can die!

 

Chop him into little fragments

Make 'man apple pie'!

Dump the loser in a vat of oil

Set fire, watch him fry!

 

Strap him in a high speed race car

Then poke out both his eyes

Hit the ignition, sabotage the breaks

And off the cliff he'll fly!

 

Lock him in a marble coffin

While he's still alive

Throw him out a 30 story window

With cement he'll colide

 

Sell him to a sadistic cannibal

Who'll eat him up with chives

Or perhaps to a psychotic killer

Who'll partake in homicide

 

Charge a hitman to take him out

With just a little bribe

Poison his drink with a slow killing herb

And torment his insides

 

Make prank calls to all of the murderers

Druggies and tough guys

Then tell them that a man is calling

One murder for one lie

 

Drop him in the lion cage of a zoo

Wrapped in meats all dried

Watch the kitties tear him to bits

While you sit there and spy

 

Throw him in the water with a radio

And he'll electrify

Torture him with wips and chains

And savor every cry

 

Make him listen to Backstreet Boys

With the volume on 'high'

Rip off his testes, take pics of that region

And present it all on slides

 

Use a voodoo doll and stick the needles

Where the sun don't shine

Take him to the ocean and shove him in

With his hands and feet both tied

 

Skew him, brew him, quick and sly

Glue him, screw him, don't be shy

For you'll be surprised at the many ways

In which a man can die!

 

 

[image]http://members.shaw.ca/kea/am/wyvy.jpg[/image]

 

------------------------------

Almost a Dragon...

"My life is one big crime, I try to scheme through it." -Common, "The 6th Sense"

 

 

Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze.

Edited by: Wyvern00  at: 3/11/02 8:08:33 pm

Guest The Grim Squeaker
Posted

____________________________

 

 

Beg, cajole, argue, scream

Life's just not the winning team

Shot, stabbed, crushed, bled

Eventually, you're all dead

So please, come along with me

 

 

 

~The Grim Squeaker

~Death of Rats

~The Great Squeaker

~Priest to the Left Side of the Priest to the Left Side of the Priest of the Left Side of the Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen

___________________________

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