Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Report Posted February 17, 2002 This is a semi-poetry thread which I had originaly started in the Poetry section of the Archmage UBBs, but felt like archiving it here. The reason I place it in the Banquet Hall rather then the Library is because I'm thinking of continuing it with the poetry threads found here some time... Anyway, here you go...
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Wyvern And now... A handy-dandy book of recipes for poetry cocktails. Just sit back, relax, and let me wip you up a delicious treat. My recipes offer only the best in flavor... (unfortunatly, the prices are not as superb... ) Having said this, Wyvern wips on a bartender outfit and phony moustache. He takes out a blender, which he procedes to set to 'Stir, Shake, Squeeze, and Generaly Liquify'. One cocktail, coming right up! Recipe #1: The 'Singing in a Bad Mood' Splash. Ingredients: 1 "Singing in Spanish" by Canid 1 "Bad Mood" by Gwaihir 2 Quarter Cups of Scotch 1 Quarter Cup of Brandy 1 Little Pink Umbrella Directions: Take a tall empty glass and mix one quarter cup of brandy with one quarter cup of scotch. Stir well. Then, place "Singing in Spanish" and "Bad Mood" into the blender and make sure that they mix well. Add the product of the two poems into the tall glass. Now, throw in the second quarter cup scotch. Stir well. Add little pink umbrella for effect. Serve cocktail warm. Comment: After having drunk a few of these babies, you'll be singing in a bad mood alright... The result: "Singing in a Bad Mood" by Cwainid It doesn’t matter that you do not know the language, You may not get to understand the words. You may have spirit, and your spirit's with the Spanish. So it is that I'll sing that you’ve just screwed up so much, You’ve lost them too, and the lyrics seem to slide along the way. Oh, go ahead and pinch the melody so naturally off my tongue, But hope’s the only dream you'll ever sing in Spanish. More to come... OOC: A note to authors of the poems I use. I don't mean to be offensive in any way... I hope you take my parodies in good humor. Edited by: Wyvern00 at: 2/17/02 11:38:20 am
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Canid "But of course you may make my poems into art more obscure than words! Sign here, here and here please...." Canid hands Wyvern a lengthy contract of use consisting entirely of fine print. She grins her famous wolfy grin in a slightly evil way... Edited by: Wyvern00 at: 2/17/02 11:42:51 am
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Wyvern Wyvern strokes his moustache and lets out a deep, hardy laugh. Recipe #2: 'Dark Angel Cereal' Charmer Ingredients: 1 "The Dark Angel's Flight" by Black 1 "Cereal killer" by Lord of the Gay 1 Half Cup Milk 1 Quarter Cup Gin 1 Little Pink Umbrella Directions: Take a glass and pour the half cup of milk in. Throw in the poems "The Dark Angel's Flight" and "Cereal Killer", and then pour in the gin. Watch and wait as the two poems dissolve into the liquid. Shake it well, then put it in the fridge for a few minutes to cool. Add little pink umbrella for effect. Comment: For an extra kick, try serving this with your Lucky Charms rather then normal milk. YAHOOZA! The result: "The Dark Angel's Cereal" by Lord of the Black Once upon a time There was a killer with the wings of an angel He committed a crime to do his job right He killed a cereal touched with death's call, It needed to be cured This little peice of grain Black as the dead and the dying themselves The killer caused all his pain He was only an evil soul from hell Of hopes and coals of angels in a furnace Nature's loving blade flies through the sky, Death's call screams in torture The 'Angel of Death' begins to fall So, he lived for many dead lives in Hell It made him think and have a good brain That is when all his fears of the dead and dying Started to cause all his pain. Search for more submissions by heaven, which bids ado.
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Gyrfalcon *Gyrfalcon laughs* This is really good, keep it up Wyvern. =)
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Wyvern Recipe #3: The 'Dancing Vamp' Deluxe Ingredients: 1 "Dance with me" by Cerulean 1 "Vampire" by Falcon2001 1 "I Like Spam" by irongolem 1 Cup Lemonade 1 Half Cup Tequilla 1 Little Pink Umbrella Directions: Take an empty glass and squeeze the contents of the poem "Vampire" into it. Mix in the half cup tequilla and cup of lemonade. Put "Dance with Me" and "I Like Spam" into the blender and pour the result into the mix. Add little pink umbrella for effect. Serve at room temperature. Comment: Be carefull who you dance with after having a few of these... The result: "Dance with a Vampiric Spammer" by ceruleangolem2001 If I could call you to my side clad in black, Encircle you in spam with my cruel computer - Would you hunt the idiot Archmage? And would you wonder how the bulletin boards hurt all the while? Though they aren't at home; still the pale people play. The night breeze helps the fallen through high school, The gentle dale spills spam into the leaves at the end of the day. Or would you hurt? Fearing the angry words of a fool that slammed you out. Did this percussion form our evil favorite thing When we forgot what posting was about? Or did you simply find another board? Leaving me to spam alone.
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Lord of the Gay Wyrven =) you got wayyyyy too much time in your hands... but its' creative.. definately refreshing and hilarious =)
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Gwaihir me tries to think of imperatives that aren't trite Eh, nevermind that, but this is truly neat!
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Cerulean Cerulean takes aggressive hold of her Sacred Stalk of Celery and punctuates each blow to Wyvern's head, with a chastisement. "You would THWACK take my lovely, tender BASH precious work for MrGoat, and you would SLAP stick it in a BOOM blender?" *Snigger* "Cool!" I laughed so hard, I almost snorted fizzy water down my nose. You had to pay for that! LOL Any more in the pipeline? It's great to see a lightening of mood on this board. Well done.
Wyvern Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Falcon2001 Yay! *Starts dancing wildly around* I got put in a blennnndeeeerrr! I got put in a blennnndeeeerrr! Woo-hoo! What you ought to do is stick one of mine or Shadowflowers together with something light-hearted and fluffy. Mmmmmmmm....fluffy.
Falcon2001 Posted February 17, 2002 Report Posted February 17, 2002 Mwahaha, that was good, I remember that...great thread...and I especially liked the part where I chimed in with 'I got put in a blender!' YAY! Of course, things haven't much changed... *Walks off singing I got put in a blender to himself*
Wyvern Posted February 18, 2002 Author Report Posted February 18, 2002 Tzimfemme & Rydia Well, if it works for the Celery that Stalks at Midnight, it'll work for Undeniably Asparagus. . . (Rydia whaps Wyvern with the spear of asparagus, thinks for a moment, realizes that Wyvern's already been corrupted to the cause, and whaps the Poetry moderators with it as well.) I want a vegetable that goes BOOM when I thwack people with it. The Asparagus just sort of whiffles and raises dust-clouds!
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