Rahsash Geldich Posted February 15, 2002 Report Posted February 15, 2002 ((This poem has given me more than its share of trouble! When I first wrote it, I fell in love with the way the first verse flowed. Then I realised that it flowed because instead of rhyme, I had used the same word! Vexed, I decided the flaming thing could stay that way, and wrote it to be so. Then when I was delayed in posting it, I lost the last two lines and the last word of the second line. Frustrated, for surely no line can ever be re-written exactly how it was, I finished again. So, without any more ado, my troublesome poem.)) Silver eyes glistened at sunrise, Taking in the new light of day. A cold wind swept up from the east. She was doomed to die this day. Her jaw was clenched bravely And her eyes were now cried dry. Her love watched from afar, Face covered in blood, now dry. "I'll always love you." Words hung. She nodded, gestured with broken hands. The guards pulled her away rougly, Yet another death in their hands. She knelt before the altar, heavy death. She looked up and saw the red sun. Her youth-silver hair caught is light. The guard's sword raised, caught the sun. Her love cried out and fought He was hit again, blood spilled. Chains protested his force, crying All tears now being spilled. She turns her head slightly, The red, the sun, the silver. Her eyes meet her loves- swish. Blood red now taints the silver.
Rahsash Geldich Posted February 15, 2002 Author Report Posted February 15, 2002 EEK! Never Mind, it decided to be annoying and appear where I couldn't see it : unishes the poem::
Ozymandias Posted February 16, 2002 Report Posted February 16, 2002 I was going to comment on the fact that you'd repeated yourself (this and "Celest"), but I guess you already caught that?
Rahsash Geldich Posted February 17, 2002 Author Report Posted February 17, 2002 Yes, I wasn't sure if it had posted or not because ezboard was being grumpy
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