Guest Dragcor Warwick Posted December 22, 2001 Report Posted December 22, 2001 one day i saw myself far away from here, in a place where the clouds seem to die into the plain horizon above my head. shadows drop to a new low. raging fire blazing at my feet. the crows peck at the trees to the left the doves gracefully fly over the meadows to the right this isnt home home is where the fire uses gasoline flames to burn uncontrollably where wrapped arms give a sense of completeness where the only angel is the one laying beside me id give up forever to see your waking eyes after a night of slumber to feel the softness of your chest after waking suddenly. to hear your heart beat under my ear. thats what life is worth a breath, a beat, a tightly held hand, three whispered words and many more softly spoken at any time if this isnt what home really is then i wouldnt know where to find it
Gyrfalcon Posted December 23, 2001 Report Posted December 23, 2001 *Gyrfalcon applauds* My only negative comment is that it seems to switch track partway through, from losing one's home to losing one's love. Nice to see a new poem from ye. =)
Guest Dragcor Warwick Posted December 23, 2001 Report Posted December 23, 2001 *blinks* erm...that sorta wasnt what it was about at all Edited by: Dragcor Warwick at: 12/23/01 7:19:59 am
Gyrfalcon Posted December 23, 2001 Report Posted December 23, 2001 Ah... See? I suck as a poem critic. *laughs* BTW, if you haven't checked, there are more responses in the Critic's Corner... I just posted min here for two reasons: 1) So you know at least someone has responded and 2) I had already posted by the time I had remembered the Critic's Corner. *laughs sheepishly*
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