Tralla Posted January 10, 2003 Report Posted January 10, 2003 Your eyes really aren't deceiving you. I sat down and wrote something postable. Just goes to show... who knows what you can accomplish when enough people bitch? Bittersweet Pour the thinner to my portrait, Wait for the face to smear away; I've left that place so far behind I won't return at all today. Or tomorrow. I won't return to that painted cage, To which my own mind is Artiste, I've run out of paint And I've broke my last brush; I refuse to maintain it in the least. I've no need. Store the face away in a corner Of the attic, to gather a cloak of dust About itself; Watch, unseeing, the lips slowly fade, The empty eyes run, The memories undone… And forgotten. Hide her away; The last joke’s on you: I'm already free of the frame. You'll be the one Forgotten, my friend, When I progress on to fame And my realized dreams. Thank you for your faded friendship.
Peredhil Posted January 11, 2003 Report Posted January 11, 2003 brilliant and true We do not write because we want to; we write because we have to. W. Somerset Maugham
Gyrfalcon Posted January 11, 2003 Report Posted January 11, 2003 Thanks for posting the poem, Tralla- I'll reset the bitching clock to six months. Wow- good use of imagary, Tralla. It's a good poem. (I planned to say more, but I'm not good at explaining what I like or don't like about poetry. *shrugs*)
Falcon2001 Posted February 14, 2003 Report Posted February 14, 2003 Amazing poem, Tralla! I wish I had known about his when it got posted, but NOOOO I'm an idiot and didn't check the forums like I should have. Oh well. This is a solid piece of work worthy of being in a poetry booky thingy...err...yeah. I know what I mean Excellent poem, post more
Zariah Posted February 16, 2003 Report Posted February 16, 2003 You are such a touching writer. I can't place the reason, wheter it be content, technique, or craft, but you truly have a strong skill.
lumpenproletariat Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 I have to agree with both of Falcons comments It did make me think, and I must confess to liking poems that don't overuse rhyming, and, the last verse makes me feel good - what I'd like to say to a lot of people I know, Adults and peers inclusive *makes a mental vow to read more poetry, especially good poetry*
SoaringIcarus Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 My only complaint is that I wish I could've heard your voice recite the last line. Rather good. -Icarus
Archaneus Posted March 9, 2003 Report Posted March 9, 2003 Great job. I don't know why, but this has the sound of a punk rock song when I read it.
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