Wyvern Posted October 29, 2009 Report Posted October 29, 2009 An interesting and rather odd story you have going here, Mr. Clamhat. :-) When I began reading it my immediate thoughts were that it felt like a cross between "Oliver Twist" and the manga "Steam Detective," but then later on it transformed into something more reminiscent of the Indiana Jones or Tomb Raider series. Wolfgang strikes me as somewhat of a comic character in his naivety and very formal mannerisms towards people, and feels kind of like a figure from a coming of age story caught in some grand action adventure. One thing that I was uncertain about in the story was Wolfgang's age... initially I expected that he was very young, but then later different events seem to hint at him being a young adult. Any clarification in that regard in the story would be greatly appreciated! Aside from that, the supporting characters seem fairly interesting, with Rose and her former Bloodpath priestess roots standing out the most currently, though Mrs. Strauss is also a nice comic relief. The introduction of the setting through the abandoned ruins was a nice touch, and I like the concept of Wolfgang getting caught up in some mob thing that's way over his head and maturity level. I did feel that the Tomb Raider style puzzle of the temple ruins dragged a little, though having Oorak as the tome was a cool idea. I'm hoping that they'll find the artifact in question soon, so that the central story revolving around Mr. Shivers and Sean Riley the blacksmith can continue! Nice to see you posting again Sir Walnut, welcome back and thanks for sharing the story thus far. :-)
Sir Walnut Posted October 30, 2009 Report Posted October 30, 2009 Thank you very much Wyvern. Wolfgang is a young adult, sorry I didn't make that more clear. Yeah that puzzle sequence was kind of long but it's one of those things that kind of slips by you at four in the morning. I'll clean it up a bit the next time I sit down with it.
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