?

[Gwaihir]

The following piece was inspired by the prompt: ?

Read my piece if you like and perhaps add your own response to the prompt below?

 

I'm not surprised that you're puzzled. It does look peculiar. But, if you can believe it, when I went to town I had only a cart to carry the groceries home in. As I started out, my neighbor asked me if I'd let her daughter walk with me, since she was going the same way to a friend's house and was a bit young to be out alone on such a winter day. I said I'd be happy to take her. Then the girl, Melanie, saw a dying rabbit in the road and cried until I promised to take it in to the vet in town. The rabbit wouldn't stop bleeding, so I put it in my old hat. So I had a bloody rabbit in my hat and someone else's child holding my hand. Not so bad.

About a minute later, a bird crapped on Melanie's coat. She noticed immediately and shrieked in disgust. Took it off and wouldn't touch it. Couldn't leave it there, her mother can't afford another new coat, so I picked it up. Then gave my coat to the shivering girl. So I had a bird-crap-coat over my arm, a rabbit in my hat and a cart behind me while Melanie wore my coat and held my hand. It’s been worse!

Not long afterwards, as I was walking by the side of the road, I stepped on an old rabbit hole. The ground collapsed and I was suddenly wet up to the knee. I was already cold without the coat, so I rolled my pants leg up to avoid hypothermia. We sped up a bit so that we would get to town faster, but as we passed a stump, Melanie just had to stop to see the doggie. Nice doggie bit a nice hole in her arm. Of course she cried, and it bled quite a bit, so I took off my shirt and tied it on her arm. There I was shirtless with a dying rabbit in my hat, a crappy coat on my arm and my right pant leg pulled up to the knee pulling a cart behind me and my neighbor's daughter walking bandaged beside me wearing my coat. So, can I have a ride?

[Ozymandias]

Well water What fish Sea foam

 

 

was what the inscription said. The blind explorers each ran their fingers across the letters in turn, silent for long minutes.

 

 

"What do you make of it?", the child asked the woman. The woman repeated the inscribed words aloud, paused, and shook her head.

 

 

"I'm not sure," she said at last. "What about you, Aesop?", she asked the man.

 

 

With a shrug of his shoulders, the man replied, "It sounds like raven."

[Wyvern]

The images of the shirtless man with the dead rabbit in his hat and the blind explorers pan out to reveal a wider view of the Assembly Room, which has a large granite question mark on a pedestal displayed at its center for all to see. The lights of the Assembly Room go out for a moment and a spotlight falls on the question mark, drowning it in a menacing hue of red. Ominous music cues up in the background as lights fall on the images of the shirtless man and the blind explorers, while the large question mark is lit sinisterly between them.

 

"Are you a victim of hazardous punctuation? Do the question marks you use accidentally dislodge smaller apostrophes and comas from your sentences?? Do they appear in packs of three??? Or four???? According to Almost Dragonic Brand Punctuation Prediction Charts™, approximately three rabbits and four explorers are victims of question mark tip piercings every year. And your sentence structures have had no alternative... until NOW."

 

The Assembly Room lights suddenly flare back on as Wyvern runs in wearing an imitation green Riddler outfit, which contrasts horribly with his crimson scales and seems to be covered in exclamation marks rather than question marks... kind of. The overgrown lizard raises what appears to be a cheap plastic exclamation mark with a barely noticeable bend at its center, then strikes a sleazy salesman sneer.

 

"Almost Dragonic Brand Straightened Spine Question Marks™ - 80 geld, cheap! Ssstop lugging around punctuation capable of puncturing, and go with bludgening punctuation instead! Thessse babies will turn your 'You buy Almost Dragonic Brand Products?' into 'You buy Almost Dragonic Brand Products!' in no time! You won't not be regretting what your sentences will no longer be capable of achieving! Extra periods also available for 20 additional geld should you wish to substitute Almost Dragonic Brand Straightened Spine Question Marks™ for baseball bats."

 

Wyvern demonstrates by pulling a spare period from one of his spandex pockets and lifting it for everyone to see. He tosses it into the air and bats it with his Almost Dragonic Brand Straightened Spine Question Mark™, sending it flying through the air and into the question mark on display at the center of the room. The granite question mark totters on its pedestal and falls over, shattering on the Assembly Room floor. Wyvern stares at the mess for a moment, then quickly drops his Straightened Spine Question Mark and begins whistling innocently.

 

"Just call 1-900-NOQUESTIONSASKED to order your Almost Dragonic Brand Straightened Spine Question Marks™ today." A triumphant kazoo medley cues up in the background as Wyvern slowly begins sidestepping his way out of the Assembly Room. The lizard's beady eyes move between his Straightened Spine Exclamation Mark and the shards of granite question mark on the floor. "That'sss 1-900-NOQUESTIONSASKED. 1-900-NOQUESTIONSASKED. Call now, and remember - you could be the cause of a fatal punctuation accident."