Guest Phoenix Posted November 20, 2006 Report Posted November 20, 2006 My family moved from England to New Zealand when i was very young. My maternal grandparents died before i knew them, and my paternal grandparents were alive, In England, and very English. i got about 4 lines from them every birthday, but the relationship has always been distant at best. When we moved to Rotorua, we became good friends with an old couple at church, Gerry, who was a retired vicar, and his wife Sheila. They are some of the greatest characters i have ever met. Sheila was born in India and was ostracised by her caste when she met and married Gerry. they have been married for over 50 years, and are still as much in love as ever. they gradually became our aoptive grandparents. we stayed with them when mum and dad were away (and found them to be completely overwhelming in their eagerness that we have a fantastic time), we had dinner with them at least once a week, and every time we came home after we'd both moved out. Gerry spoke at my sisters wedding last year. They didn't want a religious ceremony, but he prayed for them at the end, and cried for the first time i have ever seen. he was reknown for big back-thumping bear hugs, and strong opinions. he has written a weekly column for as long as i can remember, supposedly to give a his view on life as a Canon and police chaplain, but i still have the copy of his column the week he saw i show i performed in, and spent the entire column telling people to go and see it (ok, it was Jesus Christ Superstar, but still...) Sheila is proof positive that good things come in small packages. she went from being an big warm, cuddly 'adult' from a childs eye view, to barely coming up to my shoulder, but she had complete control over any room she was in. she had a disturbing habit of giving you her full attention - she'd turn her eyes on you and just listen, and you'd freeze up, knowing whatever came out of your mouth would be soaked up and processed, and probably rewarded with a huge grin if good, or a huge hug if bad. My sister treasures a baby shawl (the baby is due in 2 weeks) that she only just recieved, which is hand spun and knitted by Sheila. i could sit here for hours and tell you about these wonderful people. they spent every second of their lives working for others. if i have half the life they did i will be blessed. You see, they died. last wednesday. they were driving back to Rotorua, and hit a bus. everyone on the bus was fine, but Gerry, Sheila and their dog Benji died instantly. i just arrived in America to be here for the birth of my sisters baby, so i can't go to the funeral, but i know it will not be held in a church. there are no churches in Rotorua big enough. they are holding the funeral in the indoor stadium, because that is the only way there will be enough room for all the people whose lives this couple have touched to pay their respects. they sent me a present for my birthday this year. for the first time i can ever remember, they signed it simply, 'Granny & Grandad'. i will never lose that card, and i will never forget them for as long as i live. This is for them
Wyvern Posted November 23, 2006 Report Posted November 23, 2006 Thanks for sharing a few of your memories here, Pheonix. At the risk of sounding cliche: life can deal a very harsh hand, and I hope that you've been doing well. At the very least, you know that they led a long and happy life with one another and made a great impact on many people's lives. It's always harder to take this sort of news when it happens suddenly, so here's hoping that it hasn't been too hard on you. Feel free to share more anecdotes about them here if you ever feel like it, as we'll always be happy to listen and absorb your stories.
Guest Phoenix Posted November 23, 2006 Report Posted November 23, 2006 thanks guys i'm suprising myself with how ok with it i'm being. it might be different when i get back home and they're not there, but at the moment i'm ok. or as ok as i can be. it does get to the stage where theres so many things going on that some of it doesn't get the attention it would at other times. i think the one thing i regret is not being able to say any of this to them beforehand, but i figure they know anyway. they had an amazing life, and i can't imagine one without the other, so... it could be worse? that sounds really bad... thanks for your good wishes *hugs*
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