Most Common Words

[Katzaniel]

My local newspaper had an article today about Oxford releasing the most common nouns in the English language. It seemed an interesting source for inspiration, so I have contrived this challenge. You get 5 geld just for posting something that was inspired from this. Doesn't have to fit any rules whatsoever. But if you can also do certain things, you'll get more geld:

 

* 1 geld for each of the words from list A that you can include in your piece, up to 10 geld. I won't be a stickler on form. (life = lives = lifetime = alive, etc)

* 1 geld for each of the words from list B that you leave out of your piece, up to 10 geld - but going in descending order. ie, to get credit for not using the word "a" you must also have never used "the", "and", "to", or "of".

* 5 geld for including at least 5 words from the list, in order. It still counts if you leave words out.

* Up to 5 for some other interesting thing you do that you think deserves credit, such as using exactly every second word, or ordering them backwards, or using one word per line of a poem, et cetera.

 

* 40 geld (total) if you manage to use every single word, in order. In fact, we should place bets on whether anyone can do this before Wyvern does, because I know he'll try. An additional 10 for doing this *and* not ever using the word "the".

 

List A (25 most common english nouns): time, person, year, way, day, thing, man, world, life, hand, part, child, eye, woman, place, work, week, case, point, government, company, number, group, problem, fact

 

List B (25 most common english words): the, and, to, of, a, I, in, was, he, that, it, his, her, you, as, had, with, for, she, not, at, but, be, my, on

 

 

Brief example:

 

Still, there's one problem: this time, no person will get away with anything. The world, your lives... the day will be mine!

 

This sentence would score 5 (everyone gets this 5) + 6 (words in list A) + 0 (I used "the") + 5 (since words 2 through 6 are in order, it doesn't matter that word 1 and word 7 aren't. However if I had instead said, for example, "the world, all men, your lives..." then I would have lost my ordering points) = 16 geld. Though hopefully your pieces will be longer.

 

Oh, one last thing: you have to count up your own totals if you want the geld. I'm not doing them for you - I may scan through them to double check, but don't even count on that. I trust you all not to cheat, and if you're not sure how to do it, then you'll probably ask questions. So yeah. Have fun!

 

Reference: http://www.askoxford.com/oec/mainpage/oec02/?view=uk

[Gwaihir]

OOh, looks like great fun!

 

B: We should make an appointment.

A: Come this way. What time shall we choose?

B: Umm?

A: Well, what year?

B: This current year

A: Which week?

B: Next.

A: Which day? Tomorrow?

B: Any day. No, we work. Our company party day happens tomorrow.

A: Which office-place?

B: Either.

A: Well, which person?

B: Person?

A: Which doctor?

B: No ladies! No dead eye doctors either.

A: hmm, an appropriate live male...Dr. Kerwell will work. Now, which room?

B: No walls displaying world map thingies!

A: Can do.

B: Does Dr. Kerwell have all body parts?

A: What!?

B: Doctors without hands are scary! No children either.

A: Dr. Kerwell does have children.

B: This seems quite an obnoxious problem! Well, we can't see him when we consider this fact.

A: Gracious!

B: We must see an appropriate doctor about our case!

A: Point understood. Patience!

 

 

A: Sir, it seems, all doctors practicing under our group have children. Are you sure....

B: YES! This company should hire more doctors!

A: Sir, we already have an innordinate number!

B: Madam, we give up. This seems more difficult than filing government taxes! Goodbye!

 

 

 

There, I think I used all the common nouns but no common words. However, they weren't in order, so I haven't beaten the Wyvern-goal. Still, that seems to make thirty geld.

[Patrick]

OOC: I think I've managed to use all of the most common nouns in order. I preferred not to name the child in this short piece. If I didn't miss a word, then this should be worth the 40 geld for using the words in order (I used the quite a few times, so no points for that part) I'm not sure either whether the 5 geld for participating is included in the 40.

Time magazine elects person of the year! The judges told us that along the way, nearly every day one thing was uncertain: which man would win the prestigious title, and have the honour of appearing on the cover of Time all over the world, and have his name remembered during his whole life. It is rumoured that the chief editor's hand played a major part in the decision, as for the first time ever a child became Time person of the year. The eye of the world was on this child who did more than anyone else to fight for women's rights, mostly in poor African countries. It is thanks to his relentless efforts that finally women can find their deserved place in society, gaining the same work benefits as men, obtaining the same advantages, for example having the weekend off each week. The case that a young child could have such a great influence had been a major point during discussions between heads of governments at a recent UN summit. The impact of his deeds seems so great that even great multinational companies have been forced to give in to his demands, most importantly decreasing the number of discriminatory practices. Groups of workers have been formed in even the smallest factories, with the aim of resolving eventual problems arising due to this rapid change. This is the first time that Time magazine has awarded this allocated posthumously, but it is an undeniable fact that ............ 's influence is far reaching, and his legacy shall continue on, despite his untimely death.

[Wyvern]

Wyvern trips through Astral space, rolling over long illusionary stretches before halting near Adriana Nursely's feet.

 

Perfectly timed arrival, thinks Wyvern, peeping up Adriana's personal pantyhose. This year's best voyeurism...?

 

"No way." Adriana looks straight ahead, turning towards Time Magazine's Tom Flailigen. "Top story: Nursing profession requires day by day sexual harassment suites."

 

Wyvern says nothing, entranced by perfect curves.

 

"Man." Tom squints, noticing Wyvern's tail position. "World just keeps getting uglier, sheesh."

 

"Hospital life never gets any cleaner." Adriana sighs, nudging Wyvern's horns underfoot. "Could use some manly hands here."

 

"Taking no part, ma'am." Tom jots notes between head shakes. "Thanks though, great story. Tentatively titling this piece 'Childish Lizard Eyes Nurse Woman Unabashedly.'"

 

"Freeze." Dr. Kerwell shoves Adriana's twelve gage near Tom's back. "Good. Now, place any incindiary nursing stories under permanent wraps."

 

"Oh great, like this work week could possibly get any crazier." Tom sighs, letting tabloids drop from tight frozen fingers. "Cases are made from pointed guns, Doc. Lots... Government court cases!"

 

"Shut up." Kerwell's trigger finger twitches. "Pointed guns can also make used ammo cases, sometimes. Call Kerwell Hospital Branch's company complaint number, we'll send Time Magazine's tabloid group compensation. Now scram."

 

Dr. Kerwell watches Tom Flailigen flee, then sneers towards Adriana.

 

"Anything else?"

 

"Uhm, DUUUHH." Adriana stomps over Wyvern's face. "Giant lizards staring between legs are problematic, just like those nursing sexual harassment facts. Kill this damn footstool!"

 

OOC:

 

Memoing Katzaniel -

25 most common English nouns, ordered: 40 geld

0 words used from List B: 10 geld

Roleplaying connecting characters from Gwaihir and Patrick's responses: 5 geld

Wyvern cuteness factor: 1 geld.......? ;-)

[Sweetcherrie]

Shanuki had taken his time after the match. He had helped cleaning up the shirts they had used as goal posts, and waited until he was the only person left. He said goodbye to Mileay, and sauntered back to his own house. Avril had looked beautiful in her snoopy shirt, but he had been pretty stupid, and had not only ignored her, but also laughed at her when they were making fun of her.

 

The look she had given him had hurt, deep inside, but he was simply a cowards. A whole schoolyear he had needed to discover that he liked her, and then he just had to act in a stupid way. One day he would make sure to say all the right things, but that was not today.

 

Maybe he simply had to wait until he grew up to be a man, or maybe he just had to become a ninja. Shanuki shook his head at his own illogical thoughts. There was no way that he would become a ninja, not in this world, or this lifetime at least. He stuck his hands deeper in his pockets, and kicked at a partly eaten sandwich.

 

He must have looked like such a child in her eyes, and she had the shapes and manners of a true woman already. How would it ever be able to match those two?

 

He reached his house, and felt with his fingers above the door post. It was a secret place his mom had though up to hide a key so he could get in even if she was at work. He found the key, and quickly opened the door. After having put the key back where he had found it, he closed the door behind him.

 

He grabbed the comic book that was still lying open on the counter, and stroked the lock of hair. It had certainly been a weird week. He wished he was like the ninjas in the book, and as he kept touching the soft strand of hair, he turned the page back to stare at his heroes.

 

His stomach cramped, and he mumbled something non-descript, but that would surely have gotten his mom thinking he was foul mouthing. Shanuki grinned sheepishly at his own thoughts; she was always thinking that his language was foul, but in this case it had been only a desperate romantic mumble. His fingers slid over the points of the hair, and he wanted to get up to get something to eat to stop the cramps, but found he could no longer move.

 

He looked around him, and saw that the colours of the kitchen had changed. In one corner he saw a square box appear, and letters rattled off inside it.

 

“Even ninjas have cramps sometimes, and..”

 

He stopped reading. Was this a trick? Where was the camera? He’d sometimes heard about governments putting hallucinogenic stuff in the water, but he didn’t think the water company would agree with that. And he also didn’t think he was just seeing things. Finally he managed to move his hand, and managed to touch the counter.

 

Then he screamed. His hand too was looking comic book like, and as he whirled off the chair he saw a page number appear in the right corner. A text balloon flowed out of his mouth, and his scream was typed out inside it.

 

He stared at his hands, and turned to look at himself in the mirror. His face had disappeared behind a ninja mask, and he touched his face. He swirled around when he heard the door open, and there came in the rest of the group of ninjas from his comic book.

 

When they saw the look on his face they all took fighting positions, and spied around.

 

“Shanuki?” One of them said, “Is there a problem? Have they been here?”

 

Shanuki simply couldn’t speak. How would he possibly explain this? He must be dreaming, and he pinched his arm to wake up. But in fact, all that happened was that a drawn red spot appeared on his cartoonish ninja arm, and he just looked at the other ninjas with a dumbfounded expression on his face.

 

OOC: Not sure if it's special enough for the 5 geld extra, but I think I did use all the words from list A in the right order Couldn't get myself to also watch list B, so skipped that part and kept the story flowing instead

Edited June 26, 2006 by Sweetcherrie