Disgusting Challenge!

[Sweetcherrie]

A green cloud drifts into the Conservatory, killing all flowers on its path, and leaving a gooey feel behind. Thick as peanut butter, but with the smell of the deepest sewers, the cloud seems to seep through even the smallest cracks and settles over the people present. Some wrinkle their nose, eyes cross, and in a corner the first has already fainted.

 

Those able to stay on their legs can hear a loud thonking coming from the hallway, and as the muffled sound comes closer the smell becomes stronger. A plopping sound, and next an eyeball comes rolling around the corner. Scurried sounds announce something following the eyeball into the room.

 

A half-rotten hand makes a grab for the eyeball, and as the creature looks up, the eyeball still in his hand, some mouths drop open. The creature looks at them with the eyeball that’s still left in its socket, but one can wonder whether it would be able to see anything with it at all, since a large part of its flesh is hanging down its face, and has sunken in front of the eye.

 

With a quick move the loose eyeball is replaced in its socket with a nauseating pop. The creature coughs and large flocks of brown slime fly about a meter forward and land with a plop on the floor.

 

With its three feet nine, flabby skin, and third foot hanging loosely from its left leg, it might well be one of the ugliest creatures that ever existed, or the shortest, dwarves not counted, of course.

 

It clears its throat once more, slimy sounds gurgling through the now silent Conservatory.

 

“Ello, My name is Ugh Bah, and I bet nobody is more disgusting than I am.”

 

Ugh Bah grins, showing a set of rotten teeth, a worm crawling through a black hole in his mouth like it would crawl out of an apple.

 

OOC: Hah! New challenge! Haiku Challenge is going towards an end, and since I’ve done stories and poetry, I thought it would be nice to have an RP challenge next

 

The idea is to create an even more disgusting creature than Ugh Bah. The best player will win the cup of green slime and fungus, filled to the rim with…of course, green slime. (Though some brown and yellow smoker’s slime might be included )

[Sweetcherrie]

Ugh Bah pumps his chest up further, and roars, "Don't tell me there are no stinking mummies, rotting eggs, or worse out there?"

 

He looks around in disbelief.

 

OOC: I will close this thread next week. Am sorta hoping to see more disgusting creatures step up to the challenge, but I hate leaving things unfinished, so just to give you all a heads up

Edited April 22, 2006 by Sweetcherrie

[Sweetcherrie]

A loud burp sounds from the other side of the room, followed by girlish giggling. As Ugh Bah turns around he sees a little girl in red dungarees, with blond curls, and blue eyes grinning at him. The girl bounces over, and pulls her nose up against the odor.

 

“You do smell horrific, but I bet you can’t burp as loudly as I can!”

 

She bites a gulp of air in, and swallows it. Sweet giggles, and bounces a bit, and then burps again, louder than the first time. Ugh Bah tilts his head, and his eye almost falls out again.

 

The little girl wrinkles her nose, “You know, you should really do something about that eye, you need two to see.”

 

Ugh Bah nods, “But I can do that as well,” he declares, and breathes in deeply. Half of the green cloud disappears into his mouth, and the air suddenly smells better…for a short instant. Then Ugh Bah opens his mouth, and a pathetic little burp comes out.

 

“See! See! Toldyaso Toldyaso Toldyaso!” The girl chants and dances around him.

 

“And burping is disgusting, I know cause I’m always told so.” She giggles again and stops bouncing which is probably only good, since Ugh Bah was starting to see green from dizziness nausea.

 

OOC: Hah! Might as well have some fun myself here

[The Death of Rats]

The Death of Rats strolls in with what at first sounds like a butcher simultaneously grinding sausage, slicing roast beef, and cracking his knuckles while inhaling through a nose full of mucus and *looks* like Salvador Dali might've imagined a yak inexplicably vomiting a life-size, three-quarters digested, fully painted sculpture of an as-yet-undried oil painting of a three quarters digested (and halfheartedly reassembled with hot glue) Doberman Pinscher - on a bright,friendly red collar and leash.

 

It's tag names it simply, "Spot".

 

The Grim Squeaker laboriously hefts a tennis ball, and , letting go of Spot's leash, hurls it as far as his tiny, muscleless limbs allow.

 

Spot emits a noise that sounds halfway inbetween a happy bark and a five-foor long cockroach being squashed, and ...bounds... afeter the rolling green orb, leaving splatters of blood, a trail of unidentifiable goo, and what appears to be a pancreas in his wake.

[Wyvern]

Wyvern steps into the room wearing a horrific combination of plaid sweatshirt, neon yellow gym shorts, and green horn mittens. The overgrown lizard adjusts a pair of large star-shaped sunglasses on his snout and walks towards the center of the Conservatory, ignoring the squints on the faces of spectators as he drags his purple-dyed stinger behind him. He pauses at the sight of the large pancreas oozing on the floor, and stoops to pick up the organ with a claw. The still-twitching pancreas squirts a bit of leftover digestive fluid as Wyvern turns it in his claws, and the lizard flinches as a bit of it lands on his snout. He goes cross-eyed and licks the thick droplets off of his scales with his tongue, then sucks the rest of the fluid out of one of the organ's stems before sticking it into his left pocket for future consumption. A damp spot immediately begins forming on the lizard's gym shorts.

 

"Ladiesss, gentlemen, and things that fall somewhere inbetween." Wyvern reaches into one of the large sleeves of his sweater and pulls out a small white tin. "I would like to interrupt this gore-fest with a brief advertisement that may spark your interest in light of recent sights. Are you tired of relatives and co-workers grossing you out? Want an easy and effective way to make them more attractive?"

 

Wyvern beams proudly and sticks the white tin out for all too see. The eyes of the spectators focus on the digestive fluid trickling down Wyvern's left leg, however, and they cover their noses as a rancid portapotty smell begins wafting from a puddle forming at Wyvern's feet.

 

"Introducing, Almost Dragonic Brand Handsome Sauce™!" Wyvern grins and points at the lid of the white tin. "The liquid sssolvent that miraculously changes looks in the blink of an eye. To prove the sauce's worth, I shall now test it on this poor creature... Guh Ga."

 

"That's Ugh Bah."

 

"Whatever." Wyvern grins and opens the tin with an excited twist. The clear liquid inside seems to bubble and let off steam. "And now, witnesss the miracle of the Sauce!"

 

Wyvern tosses the liquid at Ugh Bah, and all eyes turn to the deformed monstrosity as it lets out a hideous shriek. The creature's already tattered flesh seems to bubble as the Handsome Sauce dribbles down its sides, its hanging face almost coming to life under the influence of the chemicals. Onlooking eyes widen as enormous blisters begin forming over the monster's flesh and start cracking open in miniature volcanoes of pus. Ugh Bah starts trembling in seizures as the Sauce continues to work its way through his system, and a large dent begins forming on what would have been the creature's right cheek. The monster lets out distorted scream, choked under a vomit of blood, as an edge of his spinal colomn tears through his cheek in a jagged growth. A family of maggots who had been living within the confines of Ugh Bah's mouth decide to take this moment to swarm and escape under the tide of blood. Ugh Bah's eyes perform a 180 in his sockets, revealing the dangling red veins that normally connect them. The red tubes begin to grow until they've become a gnarled tree of veins, spanning the monster's face.

 

"Ahaha." Wyvern bites his lip and a raises a claw to his snout as Ugh Bah collapses over. "A-as you can see, 100% improvement."

 

Wyvern listens to the silence of the potential consumers for a moment. He then watches as Spot prances over and begins gnawing on the piece of spinal chord jutting from Ugh Bah's face, tearing it further and further out of the corpse in a mess of torn flesh. Several maggots crawl up the length of the bone and find themselves a new home in Spot's nose.

 

"Hoo boy." Wyvern takes a step back. "I think I'll passss on watching Spot's digestive system (or what he has left of it) working through that Sauce. I mean, it's probably not as nasssty as McDonald's Mystery Sauce, but I'm guessing it won't settle too well..."

[Alaeha]

Sephora runs in, holding a paper bag at arm's length and chanting "Grossewwgrossgrossgrosseww..." She looks around frantically for a table, leaping over the prone form of Ugh Bah twice before finally settling for the seat of a wooden chair.

 

"Hey Sweet, come check this out!" She shouts, still holding the (now somewhat mottled) bag as far from herself as possible.

 

Sweet prances over to come look, and pokes at the bag "Whats in it?"

 

Sephora grins, and leans over to whisper into Sweet's ear. Amid rampant giggling, she upends the bag and drops its contents onto the chair before leaping off with a squeal and almost landing on a spot of Almost Dragonic Brand Handsome Sauce.

 

Sephora clambers up to perch on Sweet's shoulder, and frowns at her display. Resting on the chair is what appears (to the common eye) to be nothing more than an ordinary, if somewhat squished, banana sandwich.

 

"The grownups won't understand, will they?" She asks.

 

"Nope!" Sweet shakes her head, almost knocking the other girl from her seat. "Are you sure?"

 

"Of course! Wyvern told me. " Sephora ignores Sweet's suspicious frown, "Fine..." Sephora sighs, and jumps back to the chair. She draws out her Magic Marker, and laboriously begins writing on the sandwich, "They need to know. This is the grossest thing ever. Even grosser than old people smell!"

 

As she writes, an unrecognizable piece of something flies over her shoulder, but she slides around the chair too quickly to get dripped on. "Grosser than that, too!"

 

"Even a grown-up should understand that." She points at the sandwich, which now reads in oversized, hastily scrawled handwriting: Cootie Sandwich.

[Ayshela]

(LOL)

[Ozymandias]

Suddenly, a booming feminine voice echoes throughout the room:

 

WITH TRUE LOVE'S KISS, THE SPELL IS BROKEN!

 

 

Just like that, Ugh Bah's corpse begins to move.

 

"Ew", says Ozymandias.

 

The oily, torn and rotted flesh begins to rise like yeast.

 

"Ugh", says Ozymandias.

 

The rising and falling of the body's skin and muscle accelerates, becoming more and stacatto, looking more and more like boiling meat.

 

*Hurk*!, says Ozymandias, all over the floor, the front of his robe, and his nice new sandals.

 

Finally, the bubbling and frothing reaches a height nearly twice that of Ugh Bah, and the entire mass splits open like an egg.

 

CRRACK!

 

The two halves of the much-abused corpse fall away to reveal not one, but two men standing there, looking dapper in matching navy blue suits: former U.S. presidents Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton.

 

"Peanuts!", declares Jimmy happily.

 

"COOTIES!", shrieks Clinton at the ominous sandwich, before turning on his heel and running for his life, never to be seen again.

 

"I'm going back to bed," says Ozymandias.

[Sweetcherrie]

“Ugh Baaaaah! Here boy!”

 

The voice thundered through the room, and the next moment those present feel the earth shake under their feet. Something big was approaching, and judging by the words it was looking for what was now floating in bubbles on the floor. The earth shook again, and the voice cried out; closer this time, and more urgently.

 

“UghBaahaahaha! I know you’re clohose, I can smell you!!”

 

The floor croaked and moaned, and as they all looked at the door they saw an enormous shadow appear in the doorway. The shadow grew larger, and then a head was stuck around the doorway. Two blood-red eyes were staring into the room, and a familiar green cloud drifted from an enormous mouth.

 

“Has either of you seen Ugh Bah, my doggy?”

 

As he spoke the spectators could see that a half decayed cat was lying inside a rotting tooth, moving slightly with each word. A bubble of green snot threatened to drip out of the hairy nose, but the giant sucked it back in, almost lifting Sephora and Sweet of their feet with the draft it caused. The nose wrinkled, and glanced over the room. Apparently it had a good sense of smell, even though the nose was filled with snot, because the giant squashed himself through the doorway and looked straight at the goo on the floor that had once been Ugh Bah.

 

It seemed to be analyzing the situation and scratched its ass in the process. Then he bent down and the finger that had been scratching his arse, a finger about as big as a whole hand, was stuck in the blubber. He pulled his hand back and sniffed on his finger, and then stuck it inside his mouth. He sucked up the chemical ooze and made a slurping sound as if he was eating soup. The green bubble of snot reappeared and when the giant turned around he was clearly crying. Large drops of blood fell from his eyes and spread out over the floor and his face.

 

He looked around the room, scratched his arse again, and then looked straight at Wyvern. As the giant shuffled closer to the Almost Dragon the bubble of snot rose and fall as the overly large species kept on sniffling.

 

“Hahas my dohoggy suhuffered?”

 

He had finally reached Wyvern, and placed the hand he had just used for scratching his bare arse onto the lizard’s head, patting him like Wyvern was a doggy as well. The almost dragon looked up, but just that moment the giant chose to place a spotted brown finger over Wyvern’s face. The giant started crying even louder, and looked around for a handkerchief. He spotted Ozymandias’ robes, and grabbed it to blow his nose in it, lifting Ozy along in the process.

 

All the green snot disappeared into Ozy’s robe, and the giant held Ozy at a distance to look at his snot. He took his hand off Wyvern’s head and picked the robe free from his snot, and stuck the finger into his mouth. He picked his teeth with his fingers, and the halfdecayed cat flew out. With a big bow it landed in front of the girls’ feet, and both of them jumped back with a squeaked ‘ewwwww’. He dropped Ozy to the floor, like he was indeed only a used handkerchief, and knelt in front of the lizard. The green cloud seemed thicker as he spoke now.

 

“Please, tell me what has happened to Ugh Bah.”

 

OOC: Let me know please if I've accidentally misused one of the other characters.