Wyvern Posted July 3, 2005 Report Posted July 3, 2005 I love “you” but most words revolve around “me.” “you” I use to reflect my pride, my conceit. My version of “you” is a possessive “me;” it makes “you” mine. “I love you, love you good.” Bright make-up and rosy gloss, her lip reflections bring the words to life. With neon stockings, she sways her hips, and fingers thighs through trapeze touches. In street spotlights of circus mascara her eyelashes tame lion wills like whips. A playful bodice with plastic pearls: dull, meaningless as tattooed privacy. Her worn, synthetic smile presents... The Greatest Show on Earth, in broken English. “I love you” If the Hallmark card could squeak the line within its cardboard heart, its sweetened breath would surely reek of perfumed words that stand apart. A part of business, a part of “art,” an art that cardboard-hearted seek. A comic pic: a hollow lark to overcome the bleak. “I love you.” The doll’s voice is flat. She squeezes again. A lifeless drone: “My name's Sue, what's yours?” Her mother calls her "Failure." She squeezes again. A static tone: “Let's play a game.” Hide and stay hidden. She squeezes again. A hollow moan: "Don't leave me or I'll cry." The doll's tears are Failures. So she squeezes again, and plays alone until the doll's battery dies. "I love you, anyone else would have killed you by now. Pathetic, how dependent you are. Just always remember you're worthless, I'm the one that cleans your disgusting messes. You're disgraceful, you'll never amount to anything. If it wasn't for me, you'd be helpless, nobody wants a useless idiot like you. That's why you're my special little burden." “I love you.” Desolé, je ne comprend pas. Desculpe, eu não compreendo Spiacente, non capisco. Sajnálom, de nem értem. Saya tidak faham. Spijtig, ik begrijp het niet. Sugaliavam, no az ne razbiram bulgarski Anteeksi, en ymmärrä. Apesadumbrado, no entiendo. Entschuldigung, Ich verstehe nicht. Tyvärr, jag förstår inte. Огорченно, я не понимаю. 残念、私は理解しない Sorry, I don't understand.
The Portrait of Zool Posted July 6, 2005 Report Posted July 6, 2005 I really appreciate this. I'm not going to get into the mechanics of it because I think it expresses itself quite well. What struck me about "I Love You" is that it's not about love at all, of course, but reveals from the opening stanza the inconsistancy and even hypocrisy of the use of the word "love", and also how poeple's insistance that they are using the word correctly when they are not has become a kind of enforced irrationality in society. Truly, one cannot "understand" being constantly shown a hand grenade and told it's an apple. Each stanza in turn shows another aspect of what we call love, such as neediness, vapid sentimentality, animal desire, unconscious and thinly disguised demands and self-securing manipulations. These are not love. In order to truly love, you must not need the other, because the need will always distort perception and generate manipulation to get (or keep) what you need. How can you love what you cannot even percieve correctly? How can you love what you manipulate? Truly it is an epic misunderstanding laid bare. Good Job Wyvern. Very well done.
Kane Posted July 7, 2005 Report Posted July 7, 2005 Hmm. I agree that this is very well done... and perhaps this isn't the correct place to disagree with a comment, but before I get into the poem I wanted to reply to something Zool said. In order to truly love, you must not need the other, because the need will always distort perception and generate manipulation to get (or keep) what you need. I must assert that people, in their human nature, do need love. And once you have love, you need to keep it. It's personal relationships that sustain us. To think otherwise is to be jaded, and a jaded soul is one that is wounded forever. But. On all other points Zool brings up about the poem, I agree. Love is a term that is thrown around too freely in today's society, and I believe that you made that point well, Wyvern. The partial rhyme scheme works well here and I particularly like the stanza about someone's "special burden". It strikes a chord with me. Thank you for your work, Wyvern.
Peredhil Posted July 7, 2005 Report Posted July 7, 2005 Excellent and thought provoking Wyv. For my general purposes, I stick with the three broad categories given by the Greek words: Agape, Philos, Eros, with the following meanings. Agape - I love you as a choice, as an absolute, with the love that always wants the best and does the best for the one loved, even if it hurts their feelings. A love that always rewards good and doesn't give a false reality by rewarding bad. A consistent love. If the lover were a radio, they'd be an FM tower, beaming out love to all those in range, and not expecting feedback or considering the "value" of the radios receiving. The act of loving is the reward. Philos - The love of one human being for another. if each person is a Love bank - the feeling of love for the other person is a net value summing all deposits of nice and withdrawals of non-nice. Sort of "you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours". It is based on personalities, common interests, etc etc. This love can be superficial or powerful but it requires a knowledge and feedback from the other person. Eros - desire. I want. I want the other person, I want the other person to want me. From physical lusts to domination games to mind trips, there is always a central feeling within the person loving that must be met before any feeling is expended on the other. It can be mutual and sharing, or can be one-sided and a form of rape. The three taken together are why for some people I can sign my letters AP-E. I love them, I love them, but I don't desire any ownership over them or lust for them. Again, great poem.
reverie Posted July 7, 2005 Report Posted July 7, 2005 (edited) eh... i don't know. I guess you can't really say much about love if you've never really been in love... Though since the question was asked, I'll take the leap... Hmm, I think your poem treats love with with very harsh hand indeed: Dwelling only on the darkside which to me, seems more about "obsession, co-dependance, infatuation, and lust" rather than 'love...' which is supposed to be "selfless..." Translation: Love is giving, not recieving. And just maybe then, fate and fortune will abilge you, and let love come back around for you... To paraphrase the charactor Dan Fielding from the 80's sitcom "Night Court..." "No one will ever love me, Harry...because to be loved, you have to give love... and I'm incapable of that..." I think love can spring from many things. Acts of kindness, general selflessness, taking the time to care, being great at whatever you do and generally enjoying it... These things if done in earnest can inspire confidence, admiration, or receptacle actions on your behalf... Naive? I don't think so... Myself, I thought I was in love a few times in my life, but in highsight I think it was just infatuation...or not wanted to be alone...quote myself, "it's not that your lovely, it's just that your near..." Sick? Possibly... But, honestly i'm not so sure about anything anymore. Now "heartache," yeah, i've definetly felt heartache... That's an interesting combination of pain and saddness that I wish on no one... So am left to wonder? Well, if i felt heartache, as some point there must have been a grain of love there. Spurned though it was, there still must have been a quality of love there, no matter how small or brief since it allowed me to feel the pain of the rejection. It's not always rejection per se' though. Sometimes it more of a realization... A realization that you've just not seeing what's really there. All that aside, if you want to get a girl to like you more,* then make them feel special... Like they're the most important person in the world... of course, that usually requires a good memory and lot's and lot's of listening... *note: it helps a lot if there's already some interest shown on her part... my thoughts, rev... Edited July 7, 2005 by reverie
Parmenion Posted July 15, 2005 Report Posted July 15, 2005 Fantastic poem Wyvern - again you have created another gem. Always a pleasure reading your work!
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