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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

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I'm a bit of a hypochondriac, but I don't care enough about my health to act on it. My attitude is that if something's really wrong with me, I shouldn't have too long to wait around and worry about it. Does that make me an optimist? I hope not.

 

Once I had an imaginary friend who came down with such an affliction. He was under the delusion that whenever he crossed the road, he would be able to make it safely to the other side without so much as even a cursory glance to the left and the right. And I was always expected to follow right along after him. Well, needless to say, it didn't last. One sunny afternoon he was feeling particularly chipper and he practically floated out into the street. And then...BLAMMO! It's a good thing he wasn't floating, or else when the car hit him, it likely would have launched him into orbit--instead it just ran him down. He was never a big fan of the space program, so I think he would have preferred it that way. I managed to drag him out of the street, and then I buried him in the sandbox.

 

Years later I went to dig him up, but he must have fully decomposed in that time. I think it was the television that did away with him. It leaves so little to the imagination. I'm of the opinion that the imagination is like a muscle, it needs to be worked or it gets soft. I can always imagine that people are talking about me; or they would be, if I ever went out. Instead, I stay in and hear voices yelling my name. So were someone to ask me why I watch television, the answer would inevitably be: "To drown out the voices." Then I'd turn up the volume.

Edited by Loki Wyrd
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