#48

[Mira]

This is about an actual bridge in East Lansing.

 

Here I stand, on hallowed ground

A graveyard of one line poems

Hastily scrawled on concrete parchment

With pens of aerosol

 

The poems speak of long lost love; "I LOVE KAT"

Others of forgotten hate

But all lay bare their writers souls,

For all the world to see

 

With the same haste as poets before,

I add my rag-tag lines to theirs

And when the deed is done I fade into the night

But leave a part of me, forever, under Bogue Street Bridge.

 

Edited in Wyvern's suggestion: 9-2-04

Edited September 2, 2004 by Mira

[Wyvern]

I think that this is an excellent poem, Mira. Noting that the poem is based on a real bridge at the beginning may be somewhat unnescessary, as I feel that the details of the poem make it immediately apparent to the reader. Powerful imagery and evocative original details flow throughout this piece, and the narrators own involvement with Bogue Street Bridge elevates it to something touching and personal. Very well done... my only recommendation might be to change "lie" to "lay" in the third line of the second stanza, as that's the word that seems to be implied there.

 

Great stuff!

[Mira]

Wyvern,

I'm sure everone would realize the reality of the place, however, just in case anyone had any doubts, I put it there as added the little note at the top as an afterthough. Also, my obvious error has been fixed, and I thank you for pointing that out to me.

[Parmenion]

Another little gem from you Mira

[Mira]

What can I say, I aim to please.