Loki Wyrd Posted August 30, 2004 Report Posted August 30, 2004 (edited) I wonder: Terribly vile words That will cause you to lose your balance In life, in liberty, In-and-of yourself. DISREGARD FOR NONSENSE to be avoided. He shows a disregard for nonsense That I find to be quite disturbing. It is my educated opinion that he should be treated With the strongest drugs we have at our disposal; Medication is key to alleviation Of symptoms for such a troubled young man. Edited August 30, 2004 by Loki Wyrd
Wyvern Posted August 31, 2004 Report Posted August 31, 2004 I think that this is a very interesting poem, Loki Wyrd. I really like the mock doctor analysis that you use in the second stanza, as well as the thematic suggestion that disregarding the "nonsense" that society produces will ultimately cause people to shun you. There was one line in the poem that confused me a bit, which was the final line of the first stanza. I find the manner that the line is phrased a bit confusing, as when I initially read it I thought it meant that one should disregard nonsense and avoid it. Upon reading the second stanza, my interpretation of the line changed... Then again, perhaps this was done intentionally? Nicely done, an interesting piece.
Loki Wyrd Posted August 31, 2004 Author Report Posted August 31, 2004 (edited) The last line, first stanza was intentionally written ambiguously, though it was really meant to be in keeping with the first stanza (to disregard the first line). The two stanzas were written to be dissimilar, as I was trying for a different tone between them. I hope the confusion didn't detract from it too much. Edited August 31, 2004 by Loki Wyrd
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