Salinye Posted July 30, 2004 Report Posted July 30, 2004 Ivahna felt her coach lurch as it’s lumbering sway came to a stop. The lull of the rhythmic movement had almost put her to sleep. She opened her eyes, seeing the lush curtains slowly cease their swish. She wasn’t too concerned about the stop, as they were not rare. When traveling through forests, they often had to stop to clear away things like trees that had fallen over the trail, or to water the animals or prepare a meal. She closed her eyes once again, unconcerned. Twenty minutes later, she was brought out of her light slumber by a knock on her carriage door. “You may enter.” She called back softly. The door swiftly opened and an armed guard stepped up into her coach immediately lowering himself reverently to one knee. “Your highness, please forgive my haste.” Sitting up, her royal purple blanket falling from her lap to puddle at her feet, she smiled at him. “Think nothing of it, speak freely.” Ferohn looked up at her and nodded quickly. “We’ve run into some trouble up ahead, and I think you should come right away.” “Alright.” Ivahna replied slipping her feet back into her shoes. The guard slipped back through the coach door and down the steps offering her his hand. She accepted his aid and dropped down from the carriage, the mist of the late afternoon causing light goose bumps to rise upon her skin. Reaching back into her carriage she grabbed a golden shawl, draping it across her shoulders. It complimented her deep burgundy dress nicely, her long black curls danced around her face and she nodded signifying she was ready. Up ahead of where her entourage had stopped, she could see a group of people gathered. Speeding her steps, careful not to trip on the roots that randomly poked up along the trail, she followed Ferohn, her curiosity growing. Crossing through the last of the trees into a small clearing she saw a small carriage tipped onto its side, a rather frantic horse still connected to it and pawing at the ground with it’s hooves frantically. To the left of the wreck a small crowd of villagers stood in a group muttering amongst themselves. Many of them gasped surprised when they saw her. The men pulled their hats off and bowed while the women backed away, their faces reddening in shame. “Your highness!” “Lady Ivahna!” “What is she doing here?” These words, among others, could be heard rippling through the surprised crowd. Ivahna paid them no mind. Her attention was on the limp and bludgeoned form of a winged woman upon the ground. Even in death, the woman was unarguably the most breathtaking beast any one there had ever laid eyes on. A human man lay crumpled at her side, bleeding from a head wound and sobbing to himself. Ivahna slowly dropped to her knees next to them. She had never seen the succubus in her natural form, with wings. The succubus preferred the form of a cloaked human-her attempts to not stand out in a crowd. Her assumption was that death returned Elisria to her most natural state. Ivahna knew the Succubus well. Years ago, she had entered her kingdom. She made a point to call a personal meeting with the Queen upon her arrival. Elisria was very forthright with what she was. She did not hide the fact from Ivahna. However, she explained that she had heard that Ivahna was a woman who listened to reason and did not commonly pass judgment without first weighing the situation. Elisria explained that she had come to truly love her previously indentured bed warmer, a human named Tomas Scantavia. They were married in their own private ceremony. She had solemnly sworn to him that she would never again use her magic to draw a man to her. Naturally, her very countenance attracted people to her; which is why she was never uncloaked except in the privacy of her own home. She was in effect asking for Ivahna to trust her and allow her to live within her kingdom. She wanted to raise children and everywhere she went, she could not find peace. The Queen agreed, granting her permission. The only other person within the kingdom who was informed of the Succubus’ true presence was the high priest Herick. He was given the task of helping to watch over her. He could walk among the people with more ease than the queen could. Any jaunt she took through the villages, drew too much attention. “What happened?” She asked softly, not rising and with her back still to the crowd. A multitude of voices began speaking to her at once. “She was stealing our men away!” “She’s a demon, look at her wings, we have proof!” Ivahna rose to her feet turning on them, her eyes revealing her restrained rage, her authority immediately silencing the crowd. Looking at the assortment of angry and ashamed faces of her people, she noticed the shrinking form of Herick. She couldn’t keep the shock from her face. “Herick? Herick. Please come forward.” The priest stiffened his spine defiantly, chasing the last of his ashamed glances away from his features. The group parted as he walked forward to stand before her. She simply looked at him, waiting for an explanation. She didn’t feel any questions from her were needed. When he finally spoke, he did so loudly and with a trace of arrogance. “I’m sorry, M’lady. My fealty to my God is stronger than my fealty to you. It is the oath I swore upon becoming a priest.” “What does your fealty to God have to do with this? You swore to protect her!” “Yes, M’lady, but only as she kept her vows. She has not.” “What are you talking about?” She asked, anger and pain flashing across her face. “Many of the women of the village noticed their men returning home later than usual, it was obvious what was happening.” “The only thing that is obvious to me, Herick, is that your flesh is weak. It was YOU who would not leave Elisria alone. It was to be my first order of business upon my return, but I never thought you….” Her words were choked by a rising lump of emotion in her throat. “You see.” Helrick proclaimed turning back to the villagers. “She consorts with evil. Demonic whores who would steal the fathers of your children, sexually enslave your sons.” “Stop it.” She spat at him, her temper flaring dangerously. “That’s not true. She had long ago changed her ways. You see her husband dying at her side. His soul was willingly bound to her. You have murdered more than one innocent life tonight. You KNEW she was innocent, Helrick. It was YOUR lusts that brought this about, not hers.” “You will face trial for this, Helrick” On her word, guards stepped in and began binding the priests hands behind his back and the mutterings from the crowd dropped to a dead silence, broken only by the small cry of a baby. A silent tear ran down her cheek as the priest was led away. “GO home.” She told the crowd and slowly they dispersed. Her men followed the wail of the baby to the tipped carriage and quickly pulled not one but two baby boys from it. “Take them to my carriage.” She whispered. Glancing one last time down to the babies dead parents, she said a silent prayer and slowly made her way back to her entourage pondering the changes that were sure to take place as she raised half demon/half human twin baby boys.
Salinye Posted July 30, 2004 Author Report Posted July 30, 2004 Okay, so I know this needs an edit, I wrote it late at night. The idea for this story has been tickling the edges of my mind ever since I wrote Ayshela's prediction. I thought it might help explain why the Scantavia brothers have their alluring effect on every woman they meet. Plus, I thought it might be neat to see Ivahna Quixotic in a new light. Perhaps she was something quite different than she is now. Also, as Gyrfalcon pointed out and Orlan could scarringly testify too. She may be timeless, but she is definately not ageless. ~Salinye
Wyvern Posted July 31, 2004 Report Posted July 31, 2004 I like the story so far, Salinye. It's interesting to read the background of Madame Quixotic as well as the origins of the Scantavia brothers, as it's slowly developing their characters and giving us some insight into how the enigmatic trio got to where they are now. I particularly liked the interactions between Ivahna and Herick near the end, as I think they show Ivahnas up-start personality quite well. There's one thing that you might want to focus on in editting the story, which is the tense of the story when it switches from its initial course to the earlier story of Elisria. You may want to consider writing that segment in a Past Perfect tense (i.e "had entered") instead of the past tense that the rest of the story is written in, as it might help to seperate the flashback and backstory of Elisria from the rest of the piece. I look forward to reading more of this history.
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