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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

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Posted

I am young and out of love

To give, to have, to take

From the day I fell my life was hell

Then suddenly I crashed

 

I am young and out of love

To want, to need, to care

I got up, shook off the dust

And then I walked away

 

I am young and out of love

To know, to see, to touch

And I’ve found here on the ground

A reality of sorts

 

Whatever, it fits my needs

 

I am young and out of love

Don’t tell me that I’m not

I am young and out of love

This illusion’s all I’ve got

 

I am young and out of love

I’m not

I’m not

I’m not

Posted

I enjoyed very much the self-arguing in the poem. It came across to me that there was a conflict between two-sides, one which believed that the protagonist was out of love and the other which did not and so despite "hope" being introduced it is over-shadowed by a lament of sorts.

 

Your repeatition of "I am young and out of love" throughout and ending of "I'm not, I'm not, I'm not" was for me excellent in portraying this point.

 

A well written poem which was a pleasure to read.

 

:wolf:

  • 1 month later...
Posted

Case you haven't noticed, I'm catching up!! ::smiles:: I like the idea and concept in which was previously stated. It's like you ARE in an internal battle, which I know what is like, I have them every day. I enjoyed it. It made me think of recent events I can relate to, which is always aneat thing to be able to put across.

Awesomeness!

 

<love>

 

BlackCagedHeart :dragon3:

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