Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Report Posted June 17, 2004 In light of the recent "Quincuinox" party thread, I decided to look back over a couple of older party threads, and thought it might be nice to have some of them archived on these boards. The most successful of them, "Cerulean's Masquerade," has already been archived in this Library courteousy of Peredhil. Some of the old parties I remember well while others were forgotten until just recently, and there are some interesting trends that I've noticed in many of them. I'll be archiving these parties in chronological order, and will write a short commentary to introduce each of them. The first party thread archived here was egoistically entitled "Wyvern the Party Animal," and took place on the Archmage Universal Bulletin Boards from August 7, 2000 to October 20, 2000. Strangely, I remember the thread fairly well, despite it containing some of my very early and extremely immature roleplaying. What I don't remember, however, is that Arawn and Ozymandias contributed amongst others. It's not my best writing, so you'll have to forgive me for this one... ;-p
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern Wyvern sent out invitations to his party. They read: "All Archmages: come to Wyvern's enormous party! Be sure to bring your dates (especialy if they're babes) and have a blast! Food and alcohol for everybody! The party takes place in the Conservatory of the Great Council." and in the small print: "admisions fee:10$. couples:20$ (heh heh)" Wyvern proceded to get drunk as the thousands of guests began to arrive... ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Destructo Destructo arrives at the party. 10 dollars!?!?!?!?!?! thats absurd and starts to walk away. ------------------ "Destroyer of all good and evil"
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Ephemeron Ephemeron walks up to the well-lit conservatory. "Must be a party!", he finds and walks up to the building with his massive flock of sheep. He greets Wyvern and after a brief conversation he finds out about the admission. "You mean I have to pay $10 for every sheep here?!?!" Ephemeron turns back towards his sheep. Where am I going to get that kind of money..., he thinks, gazing at the endless mass of white now in front of him... ------------------ Ephemeron Master Shepherd
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern "Hey! If you don't want to pay, you can just get out of here!" Wyvern then procedes to greedily count the thousands of dollars he's already maken... ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern Anyway, the party was kickin' and all the mages (even those like Ephemeron and Destructo who didn't pay) were having a blast. If there's one thing Wyvern knew how to do, it was how to swing a party! There was alcohol by the barrel, a banging musical track, and all the Sheildmaidens and Amazons a young archmage could ask for! Wyvern thought to himself "Where are my main men Xradion and fallenlord?! They should have arrived by now. A well..." With that remark, Wyvern drank two bottles of booze at the same time and hugged the beautifull women surrounding him. ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Seraph ...who then promptly needed to be resurected from accidently being grazed by the poisonous scales and spikes on his body. Happily,decked out in a very chic golden tux,Seraph waltzes over,the ShieldMaidens and Amazons looking lustfuly at his three pairs of soft,pure white wings,and immagining what it would be like to have them wrapped around them at night. "Better than any blanket"whispers one to the other,then breaking out in a fit of giggles,The other replies"yeah,he's the one i want to get rid of that 'maiden' sufix for me" Flashing a grin at wyvern,exposing a double layer of white teeth,Seraph waltzes off once more,having stolen his entire bevy of beautiful babes... ------------------ -Seraph- Bearer of the Heavenly Throne 8th ranked among the breathren
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Zool "You mean I gotta cover this? Oh well, good thing I just sold a bunch of 'scroll of protection from fire'." Throwing wads of paper geld at the doorman, Zool entered the swingin' party. All the cool mages were there, and the band was really hot. Zool grabbed a 2 litre mug of Ol' Peculiar - Stout. Zool downed half of it, then hit the dance floor. ------------------ Zool Ager1 Eradication Mage Bard of Terra What Next?!
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern Wyvern (gritting his teeth) "That Seraph! Always a hit with the ladies... I didn't realize my charming scales were imdued with poison..." Wyvern then procedes to wipe the poison off of his scales and joins a few ladies in a corner. ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Destructo Destructo, never a big hit with the ladies stands over in the corner of the room and watches as Wyvern and Seraph fight over who gets who. They then decide that Seraph has all the shieldmaidens and Wyvern gets all the amazons. ------------------ Destructo the guildless "Destroyer of all good and evil" Ally of the unicorn king
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Gyrfalcon Gyrfalcon, being a Bard of terra, gets free passes to all conservatory events (shoulda held it somewhere else, Wyvern. ) He comes in, dressed formally in a very costly tux, that DOESN'T itch, looks very good on him, and is sized just right for him. Instantly, some of the shieldmaidens, amazons, and the really good looking witch apprentices (say 22 at the oldest) flocked around him, while Seraph and Wyvern simply hired more female heroes to cluster around them, unfortuantly having to hire some sheeperdesses and enchantresses.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern Thankfully, Wyvern recieves all of the cute Sheperdess' and Enchantress', while Seraph get's only the ugly ones. Wyvern says: "Hey! What are these ugly ladies doing in my party?! I said, if you want to bring a lady, make sure it's a BABE!" With that remark, Seraph quickly get's the ladies drunk and goes to find only some of the finest. Only the best for him... ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Xradion After a period of grueling work, Xradion finally hits the party scene. Xradion: Hey yo, Wyvern. I ain't got no money, but I brought you ten hos. Constantine the Great: Hey, don't disrespect women by reffering to them with demeaning terms such as "ho". Xradion: Hey man, chill. I ain't no male chauvinist, I'm just a player, so don't player hate. Word to the brother. Constantine the Great: And on top of it, you try to talk like a black guy! What's up with that you white bas#%^@! Xradion: What, you wanna fight punk? Constantine the Great: Yeah, I'm gonna kick your a$$! 2ndcoming: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Gentlemen, gentlemen. Lets be civilized. We were all created equal under the one true God. As the real followers know, God isn't an entity, rather, a force that brings the universe together. God is the synergy that exists between all beings, and God is frowning upon you. So lets just split the remaining babes equally, okay? Xradion: Whoa, that's like way too deep, man. But the part about the babes sounds good to me! Constantine the Great: What he said, now lets just get this party on! 2ndcoming: Wait a minute! I don't want to split the babes! And besides these multiple personalities are getting annoying. Sheesh! The more times you die, the more voices you hear. Oh well, maybe it's just because I'm drinking too much. Anyway, you guys are dead. Constantine the Great: What! I don't believe it...aaaaaarrrrrrghhhh! Xradion:Noooooooooo! 2ndcoming:Looks like my dominions took good care of them. Finally, I get the babes! Now on with this party thing! Bust out the wine coolers and the piña coladas*! --------------------------------------------- Formerly Constantine the Great ('till I was killed by that guy in Gladiator), then Xradion (till I was killed by DreamerZ), now the 2ndcoming of the one true god, and still from ashes to ashes and dust to dust. *note: 2ndcoming/Xradion neither condones nor condemns the practice of underage alcohol drinking, and does not participate in this practice himself.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern The party was really getting hot now, and Wyvern was beginning to worry. Mages were doing things which they otherwise would have not. One mage summoned 24 gorrila's, which then proceded to beat him up. Another mage accidentaly broke a seal of Armaggedon! Wyvern thought: "The time is now. It is time to bring out the entertainers, and restore a little order here." with that Wyvern announced: "Fellow Archmages! We are now to be entertained by the bard known as..." The curtains withdraw and standing there is not a bard, but a fearsome looking Red Dragon. The Red Dragon looks drunk and stuffed with food. "Errrr... We'll need a replacement bard." ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Racouol "MURDOCK!!!!" A voice said out of nowhere. The Fearsome Red Dragon, slowly turned its head towards the door. A man with only one eye and a cloth mask over his face comes storming into the room. This man reached into his pant pockets and pulled out two frying pans. "How many times do I have to tell you not to eat humans, and humanoids? I guess I will have to beat you until you spit him out." The man started slamming his frying pans against the dragon hitting all of its pressure points. After a while the dragon is hit in the stomach causing it to puke up everything it ate that day. The man turned away from the now uncontious dragon and very greatful bard and walked towards Wyvern. "It is obvious that you need someone to make sure nothing gets out of hand. I will make a deal with you, I will stop all fights and and makes sure everyone acts in an apropriot matter if you let me stay at your party for free. I am also sure that that bard will be as good as new if you got him washed up. Now I am going to do something about that dargon. OH and by the way my name is Racouol." Racouol then took out about 900 yards of titanium chain out of his pocket and preceaded to tie up the dragon with it. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Komputer At the door the Komputor stands, searching its circuits for change that was left there. "You're holding the line," the bouncer says as he continues searching circuits. It was then that he came across a C-note. "Keep the change," Komputor replies as he hands over the 100 dollar bill and walks in. His three babes explain to the bouncer that they are with him and follow. Hanging in a corner away from the red dragon, Komputor proceeds to program himself with a little computerized anatomy and begins advanced cybersex with one of his computerized babes. Then Wyvern walked on the Komputor and his babe. That SOB! He said he would keep things under control. Wyvern calls Racouol to break the Komputor and the babe. Racouol attempts, but is unable to break them apart. "Lord Wyvern!" he calls. These horny computerized ones are stuck together! "Oh, we'll take care of them later," Wyvern said, knowing that they would both climax soon. ------------------ Komputor!!! Possessor of All knowledge, so DON'T PISS ME OFF!
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Gyrfalcon Gyrfalcon conjured up a screen around the two, for the sake of any young viewers (younger then 200 years old) and then conjured up a bucket of cold water over Komputor, and a sign that said "break it up or fry, circuit-boy" There is a muffled scrambling sound, a quick muttering, and the flash of a Gate. The bucket of water appeared above Gyrfalcon, and upended itself. The water merely slid over the barrier Gyrfalcon had around himself, and the half-elf mearly grinned as the water slid down the shield. When the bucket was finally empty, Gyrfalcon lowered the shield and went back to the amazons and shieldmaidens waiting for him.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 komodo "Ten bucks?" Komodo mused, aproaching the long line. A resurfacing spell brought him t othe front of the line. "Sorry," he remarked to the previous leader of the line, who happened to be a really hot babe, "I'll be seeing you later." "By the way mister, it appears that I'm a bit late, so, ya know, you could kinda let me in for free, ya know, I mean we could both make a coupla bucks here." Racouol was quickly summoned and threw Komodo into the street after stunning him with a frying pan. Komodo dragons are fierce warriors, not easily defeated. He popped back up at the front of the line - in front of another babe, I mean this place is just swarmin' - and handed the usher-guy a 50000 dollar bill. As the guy counted out the change, Komodo sheepishly grinned and said "Well, I guess only one of us is making the money here." The usher-ticket-taker-whatever-guy handed Komodo his $49990 change, and his grin became a smirk. "I always wondered what that fool's gold spell was worth." Wyvern and Seraph were in the corner, surrounded by chicks, so Komodo went to join them. They were all sittin there with their smug smiles and all, gloating about their apparent success. Komodo, having no luck with the girls this evening (why doesn't my pickup line - Hey, they don't call me a dragon for nothing - work) looks around making sure they have an audience. "Well" Komodo started, "I've been meaning to show you guys this new unique artifact I just found." He then pulled out the legenary Chic Magnet! ------------------ § komodo dragon § "And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone..." -Metallica
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Wyvern "A CHIC MAGNET?!" Wyvern thinks to himself, then asks komodo: "Say... Komodo, old friend. How much will you take for the Chic Magnet? I'll give you 500,000,000 geld. Wadda ya say...?" ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 komodo Well....500,000,000 geld is a hefty sum. However, Komodo cannot converse with Wyvern, as he is mobbed by all of the chicks (Think Backstreet Boys and N'Sync at concert with guest appearance by Brad Pitt.) All of this attention is great for Komodo, who's thouroughly enjoying the party, but some of those other mages look a bit jealous. C'mon guys, go drink some punch or something. Hey - it's not my fault your gilfriend left you, I'm just SO irresistable! Anyway, I was thinkin about maybe renting the thing. I could prob. get more than 500,000,000 in one night (Maybe 100 mil/hr), and have it back by sunrise for the second day of the party! (Meanwile, some guys try to approach the magnet in an attemp to wrest it from Komodo, but are stopped invariably by the tightly packed chicks surrounding him.) I mean, this part IS gonna last a while, I hope. I would be dissapointed in you if you would throw such a lame, one-day party. BTW - we gotta get some new entertainment - for you guys I mean - looks like I'm gonna be entertained fine for the time being. ------------------ § komodo dragon § "And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone..." -Metallica
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Gyrfalcon Gyrfalcon chuckles evily as he places an anti-magic sphere around the Magnet. With it's emissions blocked, the babes return to their senses and go back the the men they had been with before Komodo had come in.
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 P51mus a shimmering blue portal appears in the middle of the conservatory P51mus steps out of the portal, closely followed by his friend Bob the Stone Golem Sorry, I would have been here earlier, but i had some, er, business to attend to.... P51mus then notices Komodo with a unique artifact and decides to have some fun P51mus casts his ultimate Ancient spell "Warp Artifact" on the chic magnet The chic magnet is horribly warped so it now repels women, instead of attracting them, and to make things worse for komodo the new cursed unique "chic repellent" has imbedded itself in Komodo's hand ------------------ -P51mus The Schizophrenic Mage Friend of Bob the stone golem Server 1 P51mus WHACK (ARS) suicide guild Ager Server 1 Slavik The Brotherhood of Nod Blitz Server II P51mus The Order of Storms And isn't sanity really just a one trick pony anyway? I mean, all you get is one trick! Rational thinking. But when you're good and crazy, oooh!! The sky's the limit! -The Tick Fate is like a caged gorilla. It will pelt you with dung if you mock it. -Warriv (Diablo 2)
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 komodo "Hey! What do you guys think you're doing!" Komodo quickly shook his hand and destroyed the anti-chick magnet as well as the enchantment on his hand. He cast a quick ungliness spell on P51mus while stealing Gyrfalcon's girls with his amazing smile. Noticing that Racouol was supposed to keep this sort of stuff from happening, but seemed to be enjoying the spectacle instead, Komodo cast the incredibly annoying straightjacket spell on him for good measure. "Oh well, geuss I'll just have to use my natural attractive abilities now that you punks have ruined my treasure!" ------------------ § komodo dragon § "And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone..." -Metallica
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 komodo Damn - should have sold it to Wyvern whil I had the chance! ------------------ § komodo dragon § "And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone..." -Metallica
Wyvern Posted June 17, 2004 Author Report Posted June 17, 2004 Racouol Racouol, being busy elsewhere finally sees a commotion going on. As he walked over he pulled two frying pans out of his pockets. "Ok you three, if you do not stop this immediatly I will throw the three of you out." Racouol said while pointing his one of his frying pans to Komodo, P51mus, and Gyrfalcon. ------------------ Racouol Father of Darkness The Golden Lord Lord of Nightmares Bearer of Deep Pockets
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