Questions of the Lost Man

[Arashi]

Am I real

Or am I a figment

Of some small child's imagination

Set here in his toy box

Slowly rotting away from years of neglect

Awaiting my chance to be let out

For one last adventure through time and space

 

Am I really here talking to you

Or did you just conjure me up

As you slowly lost your sanity

Were you lonely

Needing a friend

Is that the reason I am here

To hold you together while you fall apart

 

Did I really live

Or was I a dream

Floating between the void of life and death

Silently screaming

Drifting slowly to my final destination

Edited May 28, 2004 by Arashi

[Ayshela]

Glad to see you posting again!

 

i like this, and not only because you ask many of the same questions that i have. =)

 

Awaiting for my chance to be let out

i don't think the "for" here is necessary, and it flows better as "awaiting my chance"

 

 

Is that the reason I am here

To hold you together while you fall apart

i really like this. For me, this expresses very well the often frustrating and sometimes futile feeling of questionable purpose. Nicely stated.

 

i don't think i could find a favourite line, though, actually. i *really* like this, and am very glad to see you writing here again.

=)

[Peredhil]

Welcome back!

 

I kept getting mind-picture flashes of all those toys with whom I spent endless hours playing in the days before constant television and computers. Wonder what happened to them all...

[Xaious, Master of Time]

spent endless hours playing in the days before constant television and computers

Yeah. My poor TV has become neglected because of mine comp.

Good work, you who art name Arashi.

 

Geez, now I feel sad fro my toys, too.

 

And I too agree that it would flow better without that 'for'.

Overall, very good.

[Arashi]

thanks for the replies. And I just noticed how bad that look so I changed it. I missed it when I wrote it because it was late.

[Falcon2001]

Excellent poem, Dustin. I really think that inviting you to the Pen has helped you increase your poetic horizons a lot - watching you grow is a rewarding experience.

 

The overall tone of the poem is one that I feel that I've explored a few times - not only questioning the purpose of life but questioning whether we truly exist or not and if we do, whether we're just figments of some imagination. My favorite theory is that there's a large orange and white tabby dreaming us and one day he'll wake up and we'll all evaporate.

 

As to the stylistic side of the poem, I like the repitition and the free-formishness of the poem. I always was a fan of the style myself, and it works well with this poem, though I think it could work with a formatic approach.

 

Keep writing, this is some good stuff.