Vlad Posted May 19, 2004 Report Posted May 19, 2004 Blood boiling; Anger rising; Senses spinning; Why can't I just walk away? Teeth grinding; Fists clenching; Heart pounding; Why can't I... Just walk away? Hormones rushing; 'Drenaline pumping; Pride grumbling; Why. Can't. I. Just. Walk. Away? Hate flooding; Fear crushing; Passion growing; Whycan'tIjustwalkaway? Pulse receding; Thought returning; Muscles relaxing; Because I could just... Walk away.
blain Posted May 19, 2004 Report Posted May 19, 2004 Cool. Twice. Well put together, and I really like the content. The third version of the fourth line is a little rough. With what comes after, it would seem to want to have some kind of a transition going on there. Perhaps something in between the third and fourth stanza -- a particle, a fragment, whatever -- would serve that purpose as well or better. And I really like the content. Did I mention that? I like anybody pointing out that there are nonviolent options available even in extreme anger, and that they lead to being calm faster/better than the violent options do. Thanks for this.
Recommended Posts