Snypiuer Posted March 22, 2004 Report Posted March 22, 2004 Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; ARGHHHH!!!!!! A MONKEY!!!!!! joat116 (#7124) wrote; OH MY GOD!!! Where'd he go!!! Where'd he go!!! LOOK ANOTHER ONE!!! Stop him he's going for the bannannas (I like the letter n)!!! Get him off my face!!! More are coming in the windows!!! Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Gyrfalcon looks over to see monkeys crawling all over joat and Snypiuer. Faint screams come out of the pile of monkeys. Sighing, Gyrfalcon cast Armor of Light on thw two unfortuanate mages and then sent several fireballs into the pile of monkeys, blasting them away from the two mages. But more monkeys kept swarming in. Donny (#1631) wrote; Which is when Donny comes in and clears the whole damn stack of monkeys without any trouble. Devils are useful Donny Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! DEVIL MONKEYS!!!!!!!! MONKEY DEVILS!!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!-----------> <---------!!!!!!HHHHHHHHGRA ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!------ Crazypsyco (#460) wrote; someone got devils monkey problem? Here's my card: Crazy Psycho Lord of Insanity and exterminator of Devils Monkeys. This is a job for me... DAMN! Forgot my extermination kit WERE ALL GOING TO DIE NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Gyrfalcon suddenly remembered a spell he had seen once long ago, to deal with a plague of dancing carrots. Summoning his mana swiftly, Gyrfalcon summoned the Killer Rabbit. (Montey Python and the Holy Grail) It flew with a single bound into the pile of Monkey Devils and Devil Monkeys, and blood and pieces of the monkey horrors started flying... joat116 (#7124) wrote; Dang it man I called dibs on Cameron's rabbit when he left. Go back and check. Now give me my tower guardian rabbit back. Harumph Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Rydia (#1951) wrote; Rydia appeared in the midst of the melee, trying to wrench a--paddle?--free from the grip of a devil monkey. "I need this back, darnit! How am I supposed to steer the ark without a rudder! Holy magic has no sense of direction; leave it alone and it just randomly attacks black mages!" Minta sneaked up behind the monkey and felled it with a blow from another paddle. Together, they thrashed about, bashing monkeys, whelks, and REs left and right. Rosemary began chanting one of her darker rituals, but cut it short and flung herself obsequiously at the paws of the Killer Attack Rabbit. Crazypsyco (#460) wrote; I know! I'm gonna used the good mmonkey summon spell. Crazy Psycho start casting and good monkeys appeared and attack the devils monkeys but suddenly a black priest arrive and convert good monkeys into Devils Monkeys. Damn priest! Nim (#5882) wrote; Holy Hand Grenade, anyone? Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Gyrfalcon, taking a cue from Nim, suddenly pulled a pair of Holy Hand Grenades from his pockets. Gyrfalcon heaved one into the pile of devil monkeys, taking the time to cast Shroud of Darkness on Rosemary so the blast wouldn't effect her, and tossing the other one at the feet of the dark priest, taking the time to cast Sunray on him to increase the effects. With a massive double blast of holy energy and good 'ole explosive power, the pile of devil monkeys was blown to bits. However, the dark priest somehow survived the blast, and waving his hands, summoned an ever increasing swarm of devil monkeys. Soon, Gyrfalcon, Joat (who was still muttering over Gyrfalcon having summoned the Killer Attack Rabbit), Crazypsycho, Snypiuer (who was running back and forth in place ( ->AAHH!! !!HHAA<- ->AAHH!!)), Rydia, Rosemary and Minta, and the Killer Attack Rabbit were back to back in a circle surrounded by a ever increasing sea of devil monkeys. "This doesn't look good." Gyrfalcon said quietly. Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; --------aaarrGGHHHhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!-------------> <---------!!!!!!!!hhhhhHHHHHGGgggraaaa--------- --------aaaarrggGGHHHHHHhhhhh!!!!!!---------> Snypiuer suddenly stops. Turns towards no one (computer screen) and says, "I blame it on Rydia for 'spanking' the monkey's with her paddle." Snypiuer then continues to run helter skelter and screaming at the top of his lungs. AAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Agrias (#5909) wrote; Hoping to gain good realations with other mages, Agrias sends her valued priestess to deal with the devil monkey situation. The priestess stepped forward, gleaming with confidence of her magical powers, to await for a word from her mistress. "Go!" Agrias commanded, and the priestess gathered up some troops and supplies and charged off towards the devil monkeys. Agrias sits back at a distance and stares in astonishment at how amazing the priestess' powers -- suck over the hoard of devil monkeys... Within moments, the monkey devils and the devil monkeys mutilated the priestess, throwing her body parts off in the distance. Agrias even finds her priestess' magical cane flying towards her, randomly knocking out one of her guards, and as the priestess dies in agony off in the distance the crytal ball at the end of the cane shatters and two very large bags of geld magically appear along with a cloud of smoke. "So that's where she keeps her money!" Agrias says under her breath. Agrias picks up the two bags and prepares to leave only to find that she is surrounded by the hoard of monkey devils and devil monkeys. With two very large bags of geld in her hands and nothing but dead bodies and devil monkeys around her, she mutters quietly, "Life is short..." Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Snypiuer stops yet again. Removing priestess bits from his person and wondering at the voracious apetite of that rabbit, he remembers something about devils and oil flasks mentioned by one sexmage (overheard in a "gentlemans video" arcade - but that's another story). Snypiuer grabs several flasks of oil and pours them on the devil monkeys, monkey devils and basically everything in site. Snypiuer realizes that now he has nothing more then a bunch of greased up monkeys and mages. Sexmage meanwhile stands in a corner going, "Oh yeah!" Snypiuer then does the sensible thing and resumes running back and forth while screaming at the top of his lungs. AAAARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *************************************************************************** ~~~AT THIS POINT, SEVERAL THINGS HAPPEN -- ALMOST SIMULTANIOUSLY~~~ --------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------- *************************************************************************** Crazypsyco (#460) wrote; Then Crazy Psycho use a scroll of protection from fire on each mages of the room and caste Inferno, all monkeys die but the dark priest is still alive and continue casting devils monkeys Man he must e a god! Shurak (#1402) wrote; *Having returned from a long holiday, Shurak strides into the Banquet Hall to be greeted by the sight of greased demonic monkeys swarming through the entire structure.* A thought crossed his mind... "Well, at least some things never change." *He begins to utter arcane phrases in an attempt to start a conflagration, only to have an apprentice hand him a match.* "Thank ye, lad." *He whistles loudly to gain the attention of the room, to be met by thousands of sets of eyes... mage and monkey alike.* "I hope ye're all insured..." *Somewhere inside, someone mutters, "Nuts..."* Kasel (#5732) wrote; His favourite smell, the favourite smell of all Reds, the pungent smell of many things doused in oil, wafted out of the banquet hall and into the shadows, were newly reincarnated eradication mage Kasel was wont to lurk. Sniffing his nose to fill it with the heady smell of oil, and twitching occasionally, Kasel moved carefully out of the shadows, followed closely by his faithful Red Dragon, Gunter. Turning excitedly to Gunter he frothed "This is it! It smells like it's time to make our debut to the banquet hall!" Wiping the foam from his lips, straightening the tattered blue robe that served as his royal mantle, he capered off in a winding, haphazard course away from the front doors. Suddenly remembering his intent, he promptly turned around, and started a winding haphazard course towards the front doors, quite pleased with how things had begun. Gunter, quite capable of speech, merely shook his massive red head and snorted, incidently scorching a small family of tree squirrels. Gunter quite had his hands full keeping the twitching mage on his feet as he finally scrabbled towards the banquet hall, leaping, skipping, and tripping, in order to avoid the traps of his "invisible enemies". Eventually reaching the door, Kasel sticks his head in just in time to hear some unfortunate entity mutter, "Nuts..." Sighing, Kasel turns and says solemnly to Gunter, "Maybe we should come back another time." Then quickly darts behind the scale-encrusted bulk of his friend. Perplexed Gunter crouches down to look into the doorway, moaning softly when he hears Kasel's voice float from behind him, "I swear, I didn't do it, but gee...this'll be fun!" Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Gyrfalcon pulled out a Scroll of Protection from Fire and used it on himself and the people around them, keeping the flaming devil monkeys at bay. Suddenly, Gyrfalcon noticed the dragon poking his head in and Gyrfalcon shouted to him "If you breath fire on those devil monkeys, I'll give you 20,000,000 geld!" The dragon, greed in his eyes, flamed the devil monkeys more, causing many of them to die and the rest to be severly charred. True to Gyrfalcon's word, 20,000,000 in geld rained down behind the dragon, having the unfortuante effect of burying Kasel in a large pile of gold. The devil monkeys regrouped, only to be faced by one now very angry Killer Attack Rabbit, who again launched itself into the devil monkeys' midst. Blood and charred devil monkey pieces began to rain down on the area around the pile of monkeys. ******************************************************************************** ****** Blak Kat (#6732) wrote; Now we just have a bunch of flaming devil monkeys on our hands. They also look really angry.... Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; AARRRGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANGRY, FLAMING, CHARREDEDED DEVIL MONKEYS AND MONKEY DEVILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHH. . . .OOOPHH!!!! Tripping over (and knocking sensless) a rather large and full attack rabbit, Snypiuer realizes that he may have just stepped on and eliminated everyones one hope at salvation. The gutteral sound of demented monkeys increases. At least Snypiuer hopes it is the monkeys as he prepares to resume his hysterics. . . . . . . Slugge (#2017) wrote; Well, just a bit off topic, but isn't RE:Infinity:A..... like Infinity+1? Anyway, this whole monkey debacle will teach me to use my monkey to distract Snypiuer while I try to pick his pockets. Ok, now let's finish this. If any of you wasted your time readin' my story about The Conclave, you'll understand the true power. *Reaching deep withing himself and his pocket, Slugge finds a hardly used, only partially open, Can O Mimes. Unleashing its unearthly powers, a legion of deadly street mimes are transported into the area, led by none other than Speak No Evil.* *The mimes waste no time in trapping the monkeys in invisible boxes and tying them up with that rope they always seem to be pulling on. However, the casualties are high, as many mimes are trapped withing the boxes with the Devil Monkeys. A grim fate indeed* Well, let's take inventory of what is lying around. If I missed anything, by all means, add it. Here it goes: 1- Red Dragon with a check for lotsa geld 1- Speak No Evil Several- Mimes Lots- Charrred Devil Monkey corpses 2- Exploded Holy Hand Grenade Fragments Many- Empty Oil Flasks 1- Killer Attack Rabbit 1- Bystander who said "Nuts. . ." 1- Hysterical Snypiuer 1- Dead Priestess 1- Agrias's body found underneath many monkeys, clutching sacks of geld. Have yet to determine whether she is still alive. 1- Dark Priest (Where'd he go. . . where'd he come from?) Several- Of Rydia's paddles, but she'll probably want them back 1- Paddle for the ark. She'll definitely want that back. Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Thats about it, unless you mean to add: Several- somewhat sooty mages (all those flaming devil monkeys) many,many- RE:s Gyrfalcon the half-elf battlemage Immortal of Fire (a whole new meaning to this title. > ) Berserker of the West Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Realizing that the danger has been defeated before he can resume his hysterics, Snypiuer calmly and quietly stands, grabs the still sensless rabbit (remembering something about HasenPhepher or some such) and stealthfully begins to leave before ANYONE can remember who began this debacle. Before leaving, Snypiuer picks up what appears to be a gem but is only a peice of shattered cystal. He non-chalantly throws it over his shoulder as he begins to leave. It sails high and lands in front of a devil monkey. The devil monkey looks up realizing there is NO TOP to the invisible boxes! An evil grin appears upon the devil monkey's face. All are oblivious as he informs the rest of the monkeys. As he walks toward the exit, Snypiuer waves at a dark priest who seems to be about to cast a spell. Snypiuer thinks to himself, "Where have I seen him before? Doesn't matter, this rabbit will be perfect for dinner." Muffled screams of terror can be heard for miles. . . . . . . Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; As the rabbit wakes up in a *very* angry mood. The only reason Snypiuer isn't torn to bits are his protection spells, but the rabbit can still chew on him quite a bit. The devil monkeys started climbing the walls of their invisible cells, only to run into a barrier... standing at the top of each cell is a hungry Mind Ripper. Horrible screams came from the devil monkeys as there brains are ripped out of their skulls and eaten. Then horrible sreams arrise from the Mind Rippers, because Devil Monkey Brains does not cause increased psychic power, it *cuts* your spychic power down to nil. The Mind Rippers charge the door, trying to escape and find some Monkey Brains, incidentially trampling a dark priest. Crazypsyco (#460) wrote; The dark priest finally finish casting his spell ands disapeared with a note on the floor, Crazy Psycho got take the note and read it: enjoy your victory will you can cause I'll be back for sure and with greater minions. Blak Kat (#6732) wrote; Blak Kat previously unoticed sneaks up behind the dragons pile of gold. He quickly incants a spell. Just as he is about to teleport away he jumps into the dragon's pile of gold and all that touches him goes with him. Kasel (#5732) wrote; Standing up angrily, mouth open to berate his dragon for taking bribes, Kasel is completely buried under the stream of geld as it falls on top of him. Sputtering about the taste of geld and thrashing about wildly, Kasel wins free just in time to catch Black Kat's boots in the face. Forced to retaliate, Kasel retreats into his mind for a counterspell . Inside the gibbering and raving voices inside his head Kasel sits inside a small pool, the only place, of quiet. "I need a spell!" The voices confer, and Kasel lets down his will to allow them control. As the multitude flows over and through him, Kasel opens their eyes. Kasel is slightly disappointed to see that the voices have let him cast Dispel. Reappearing in midair, Kasel gets to land on top of the pile of geld, and a fairly surprised Black Kat. Unfortunately in the grip of the voices, Kasel is forced to conclude that the best course of action would be to cling to Black Kat's head, and try to gnaw off his hair. Sighing dramatically, Kasel gets to work. The bystander previously responsible for nuts glances at the Mimes, the monkeys, the invisible boxes, the mage gnawing on another mage's hair, and feels the need to reiterate his original statement. Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; AAARRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Snypiuer plows through the newly released horde of devil monkeys and monkey devils, wildly clawing at what appears to be a giant furball attached to his face. Slugge gently rocks himself in a corner as he sobs quietly, "It was only one monkey, just one." Minta Rose (#3444) wrote; Minta returned from the shoreline as night fell. She opened the Banquet Hall and was promptly bowled over by 47,340 gold coins, seven devil monkeys, and one of the Attack Rabbit's knee-high bunny bits. Seizing her circlet from a passing devil monkey in style worthy of a third-rate ninja flick, she rolled and regained her footing, only to be knocked over by *another* tide of devil monkeys. From her supine position, she looked into the Banquet Hall and saw mages with their faces swathed in hair: Kasel chewing Blak Kat's mane, Snypiuer exhaling a furball, some unfortunate who drank from a Coconut Oil Flask (SPF -30%) growing coconut fuzz on his tongue, and Gyrfalcon looking rather confused as the Attack Rabbit shed angrily upon him. Then Minta turned and watched the devil monkeys crowd around Rosemary and her amulet. In her bright yellow dress, she looked like sunshine, the devil monkeys following her like sunflowers. She seized the arm of a monkey whose head had not been drained and began preaching at it. "That is not as you will be! Where is who is as you will be, you are?" In utter confusion the devil monkey stopped capering. Between them and Minta, the gold that teleported out when Blak Kat touched it fell to earth in a gentle shower. For some reason, the teleportation spell faded slower for some coins than for others, resulting in a brisk gold front moving towards Blak Kat's realm. "You are, you are, and are not as will be is," Rosemary said, holding her shawl over her head as gold coins tumbled, "yet was. Four. Four is not as you were," and all the devil monkeys held still in the grip of confusion, "and you are here for those who said it is as they will be." Monkey after monkey, wounded by repeated blows from falling gold coins, sank to the ground. Minta found one of the paddles jammed in the lock of the Banquet Hall door, distastefully broke a Flask of Holy Water above the blade, and began knocking the stationary targets unconscious. Hundreds of monkeys and Slugge slumped over with large bumps upon their noggins. Slugge (#2017) wrote; Geez, lose us'ge of yer eh key 'nd everyone picks on you. 'nyw'y, here goes: *St'nds up 'nd groggily sh'kes he'd. Looking 'round 't the devist'tion th't the monkey devils (or devil monkeys) m'n'ged to c'use, Slugge mutters under his bre'th.* "Seems like them furb'lls 'ren't gonn' stop 'nytime soon, so. . . " *Slugge puts on 'n old h'lloween costume, disguising himself 's ' monkey. He runs 'round, trying to collect the gold coins 's well 's prod the monkeys on to wre'k further h'voc* "H'IL TO THE CHIMP!!" Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Gyrfalcon, in a fit of rage, pitched the Killer Attack Rabbit at the nearest devil monkey, which seemed to be unusually large. It also seemed to be able to talk, as it ran around screaming "Every one is picking on the only person to lose his eh key!" Gyrfalcon shrugged to himself before grabing another oar and beating the crap out of several monkeys, including one that keep on saying "Stop hitting me! I just lost the use of my eh key!" Only when Slugge's hood came off, however, did Gyrfalcon stop hitting him. Gyrfalcon, in his embaressment, did the only thing he could think of- he went off to get Slugge an 'Ole Pecuilar to make him feel better. Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Snypiuer realizes that the attack rabbit is no longer attacking him. He stops. He takes in the situation. He quickly determines that, while running around and screaming has worked VERY well for him, it did NOTHING to actually eleviate the problem at hand. He shudders to find that Slugge has embraced the lunacy. A quick calculation of all that has happened leaves Snypiuer with but ONE option! Snypiuer produces a Contract which will give the devil monkeys and monkey devils their own television network to air movies of their own making - IF they cease and desist! The monkeys AGREE (the lure of Hollywood touches ALL)! Snypiuer begins to sweat, hoping beyond hope that NO ONE finds out about, or even worse - points out, the small print hidden in the contract before the monkeys sign! Snypiuer prays that the Dark Priest doesn't reappear! If the monkeys were to find out what was hidden in the small print (in fact, if ANYONE were to find out!), the very foundations of Terra itself would tremble with the onslaught that would come! Sweat glistens upon Snypiuer's brow as the lead monkey prepares to sign. . . . . . . . . Shurak (#1402) wrote; *Shurak stumbles from hiding behind the bar, after having overturned a cask of particularly strong spirits and downing it throughout the melee. Drunken, he bellows* "Snypieur?! What the heelll are doze minkeys doin?!" *All eyes turn to the drunken dwarf, and with no need for urging, Gyrfalcon hurriedly clamps a hand over Shurak's mouth, and bodily carries him outside before he can ruin everything* OOC - Hey, everybody needs a cameo every now and again Shurak Whitefist, the dwarven illusionist Immortal of Justice Tie-er of One On LLyL (#2038) wrote; > > > > > >*An eyeless horror with raven hair runs shrieking past the mayhem outside(and inside) the banquet hall. His cloak, which does not move despite the speed with which the demigod runs, gives away the creature's identity as LLyL, demigod of the outer planes... oh what horrible thing could possibly scare the Immortal of Fear?* > > > > > >"C-C-C-C-Car... C-C-Carrots!!!! D-D-Dancing C-Carrots!!!!!" LLyL screams as he streaks down the lane and out of sight. > > > > > >Several moments pass...then a low trembling from afar quickly becomes a great vibration, disrupting the lead monkey from signing the contract. The vibrations worsen and a great droning noise becomes louder...whatever it is grows very close now. > > > > > >"Ay, 'tis my luck to be *burp* here for their return" Shurak mutters as he readies his illusions..and his massive battle axe (well, massive for a dwarf that is) > > > > > >The droning grows louder, as if the source of the noise is within the great city. The sound is like a great hailstorm, but one with large chunks of hail--thousands of pitterings and patterings striking in steady rhythm. A young boy with lumps on his head, dressed as a monkey, looks up and screams "CARROTS!!!" then immediately passes out. > > > > > >Looking down the lane from the gathering outside the hall, the patrons bear witness to the massive waves of orange death that is the infamous carrot legions of the far far east. So far east is their homeland that it's actually quicker to get there going west! > > > > > > The massive carrot army stops a mere 50 paces from the banquet hall terrace. The deading silence that ensues lasts immeasurable minutes... > > > > > > Suddenly, the carrot legions break out into their only form of attack, the most savage and hideous thing anyone has ever seen: THEY BEGIN TO DANCE!! > > > > > > "THE DANCING CARROTS HAVE RETURNED!!!" LLyL screams from the roof as he hurls black flame-balls at the carrotenous masses... OOC. ok, next person's turn LLyL, Immortal of Fear, Demigod of the outer planes Minta Rose (#3444) wrote; Rosemary thought back to her last audio-tape from the Terran Library, a selection from the child's rack. For once, they may have given her a useful one, instead of such monstrosities as "Mana Micromanagement: How to Run Twenty Dragons on Two Thousand Acres for Two Turns" or "The Little Multi that Could". She sneaks up behind the Attack Rabbit, stuns it with a blow from a paddle, drains its blood, gives it a sip of her own, and stands back. Big Bad Bunnicula awakens, and he awakens hungry. So many juicy carrots. . .so little time. . . Blak Kat (#6732) wrote; Blak Kat strides in through the back door of the hall. His hair is singed off his head. " that dragon wasn't happy when I stole his gold" He look around and realizes the monkey crisis is almost over, but the carrots is another story. The attack bunny is ripping through them gorging madly, when, all of a sudden, he becomes full and falls over with a bellyache. The carrots quickly regroup. "this doesn't look to good." Kat quickly calls upon his magical kitchen knives of carrot cutting and murmmers a spell to send them on a carrot killing spree. Unfortunately, he got the words befuddled and the knives shoot in all directions, hungry for something other than carrots. People! "oh dear! oh dear! Now how do I turn these things off again?" joat116 (#7124) wrote; Joat stood aghast at the scene before him. Dancing carrots held dear friends in their hypnotic thrall and devil monkey's rended newbie mages to pieces. It was Insanity incarnate, of course that was no problem for the Demigod of Insanity but still if everyone died who would he be insane at? Thinking for a moment of the most Insane thing he could Joat teleported to his castle. Grabbing a yellow horn and a scepter of bacon he teleported back to the scene and began his work. First he took the horn and blew a deafening blast on it. Then he ran into a nearby stable and waited for the beggining of the messiest food fight in Terra. Approximately 5 minutes later the city once again began to tremble. From the north approached a giant army of bannnnnnannnnnnnas. Their yellow banners flew proudly above them as they marched into the city. Immediately the carrots stopped their hypnotic dancing and fell upon the bannnnannnnnnnnnnnas. Chaos erupted as tiny swords, spears, and shiels clanged against each other. The battle was going well until suddenly the devil monkey's errupted from the hall. Quickly grabbing bannnnnannnnnnnnas and stuffing them into their mouths they turned the tide of battle. From the security of his stable Joat saw the carnage. Grabbing the bacon scepter he began to call forth all his energy and concentration... Snypiuer's tale Snypiuer stopped screaming for a moment as he heard a rumbling coming from a nearby stable. Curious he watched as the building began to visibly shake. Then suddenly the doors burst open and Joat rode out of the stable on the back of a pig. Wearing a can of spam on his head and a plaid cape Joat was leading an army of pigs against the monkey's. The pig's fell upon the monkeys with a viciousness that only pigs have and the monkeys began to retreat along with the remaining carrots. Joat sensing their weakness order his armies to attack. Just as the first pig riding bannanna got within fighting range it with all the rest vanished. Joat's mana had run out and the enemy remained. They were weaker but still a monstorous sight... Joat Demigod of Insanity Immortal of Shadows Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Realizing that NO ONE had actually read the small print on the Contract before all hell once again broke loose, Snypiuer quickly grabs it and hides it before anyone becomes curious. Although the monkeys never signed it, the most important thing was that no one read it! Still, Shurak suspects! Snypiuer thinks to himself, "Hopefully, in his inebreated state, Shurak will forget!" Snypiuer falls back upon his earlier plan of hysterics. Until, a rumbling noise catches his attention. . . . . Gyrfalcon (#1072) wrote; Which turned to belong to ANOTHER army that was approching. This one was headed by Gyrfalcon and a drunken Shurak, leading a large army of rabbits to fall on the carrots rear in a stunning assault. In the middle of the battle was Shurak and Gyrfalcon, who were under attack from waves of carrots and some of the remaining devil monkeys. Shurak was laying about him with his battleaxe, while Gyrfalcon had found a long sword somewhere and was using it to chop up a few carrots while waiting for the next devil monkey to work up the courage to come at him. Around him and Shurak was a pile of devil monkey corpses and many, many chopped carrots. However, things were looking grim when... Slugge (#2017) wrote; WAIT!!! *Brandishing his A key, Slugge rises up out of unconsiousness, wondering who it was that hit him with that paddle. Shaking it off, he storms up to Snypiuer* Now that I have my key back, I can resume acting as legal advisor for these devil monkeys, or monkey devils. Now, let's see this contract. Hurry up with it, the dancing carrots and rabbits are a bit too close for my comfort. just let me put on my glasses and read this fine print, and then we'll sign. . . *To give himself time to read the fine print of the monkey's TV contract, Slugge opens another Can O' Mimes, again summoning forth these deadly street performers, as always led by Speak No Evil. Withought hesitation, they leap into the fray* Shurak (#1402) wrote; As Shurak and Gyrfalcon continue to hew through what seems to be a stew of assorted bizarre characters, the dwarf spies Slugge loosing his killer mimes upon the populace. Before he can do anything, however, some mage's kitchen knives begin to shred newbie mages with considerable speed. Torn between saving newbies or wreaking death upon the mimish hordes, Shurak shrugs and begins to split the white-faced monstrosities as best he can. "Alright! Ye sorry lot are gunna get it now! I've been saving these dead Dwarven Elite for a special occasion!" Wicked black energy sparks and crackles from around Shurak, as his spell lances out and into a train of wagons that lined the street. Dozens of half drunken, carnivorous dwarves appear from seemingly out of nowhere, each wielding wicked axes and feral grins. "Mimes, meet the Inebriated Dwarves Intolerant Of Talentless Street-perfomers! Oh, and they're already dead, too!" His beard blowing in the breeze as he laughed, Shurak's IDIOTS began to shred mime-flesh with gusto, chopping any mime that moved, and eating those that didn't.... Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Slipping Slugge a PHONY contract (Snypiuer is prepared!), Snypiuer begins to move away from Slugge as he searches for his glasses. Turning to run, Snypiuer is caught between the IDIOTS, mimes, carrots, bannnnaannnnaas, pigs, devil monkeys, monkey devils and bunnicula. Not to mention several mages who seem to be upset. . . Snypiuer points off behind the mages, says, "Look!" and runs in the other direction as EVERYONE turns in horror to see what else could be coming. . . . . . Blak Kat (#6732) wrote; Could it be? Yes it is Blak Kat's army of furious Zombie Hellions. Undead mages with the enchanted rune swords that have the power to blast the life from the living and dispell the kitchen knife enchantment. Unfortunately just as the get into the fray the swords turn into signs that they raise over their heads. NO MONEY NO WORK they read. Calls of, "We want more than a losy .02 mp" can be heard. Blak Kat looks a tad embarrassed "I really should start paying the chaps. He sits down to start a zombie union negotiation when all of a sudden like... Slugge (#2017) wrote; THIS BIRD'S GONNA FLY!!! *Slugge, still wearing his monkey suit but not the mask, leads the remaing mimes (several still have dwarves knawing at their ankles) and devil monkeys out, letting the remaining armies wreak devistation for the moment. But they will be back* Oh, and Snypiuer, my monkeys demand a REAL contract! Snypiuer (#7089) wrote; Message #18637 A. . . . . . . . 00-01-02 08:47:46 Snypiuer wrote ARGHHHH!!!!! A MONKEY!!!!! There followed 17 post to the title (from what I counted that were not erased) by myself and: Joat116 Slugge Gyrfalcon Donny Crazypsyco Rydia Agrias 2 side titles were: A. . .Maybe I can be of service - 1 Gotta have the Monks - 3 RExInfinity A. . . . . had 5 post, started by Shurak with: Kasel Blak Kat Gyrfalcon Snypiuer That Whole Monkey Thing - 10 Post: Slugge (started) Gyrfalcon Snypiuer Crazypsyco Blak Kat Kasel Minta Rose 1 Side post: A proposition -1 Slugge RE:x11 That Whole Monkey Thing - 2 post: Gryfalcon (started) Snypiuer Monkeys Monkeys Everywhere - 7 post: Shurak (started) LLyL Minta Rose Blak Kat Joat116 Snypiuer Gyrfalcon XLots Monkeys Monkeys Everywhere - 2: Sluuge (both) The Monkey/Carrot/Banana/Mime/Pig/Vamp Bunny War - 4 post: Shurak (started) Snypiuer Blak Kat Slugge 57 Post that are still up, by at least 14 mages. Should we be ashamed of ourselves? Or should we be proud? Who knows? BUT, with Slugge taking the monkeys away and what seems to be a reservation for the banquet hall, it seems that it has finally come to an end. I will miss it. Thanks to everyone who contributed and enjoyed this debacle! Snypiuer. P.S. "What's that over there?" ------------------ Snypiuer Bard of Terra Demi-God of Suicide Squirrel Squadrons
The Portrait of Zool Posted March 23, 2004 Report Posted March 23, 2004 Shurak? JOAT? LLyL? Nim? Slugge? And Snypiuer! Like, WOW!! - that is entertaining! (and ancient! )
Ozymandias Posted March 24, 2004 Report Posted March 24, 2004 YOU SAVED IT!!! Snyp, ol' buddy, I could kiss you. ...but I'll stick with a straight two thumbs up. :pen: :woot:
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