X-Sabre Posted February 1, 2004 Report Posted February 1, 2004 All of this energy spent, lost in the stream of time. Wondering why they've went, it feels like a bad crime. People ask how I am so strong, to have faced all that I've seen. But maybe they're all wrong. And their vision not so keen. How do you bury a friend? Standing so strong for everyone. Only to see another life end. Asking it to be all undone. I stand solemn, like a pillar, I don't speak, nor do I sigh. It's all nothing but filler, I'm just too weak to cry.
Alaeha Posted February 1, 2004 Report Posted February 1, 2004 "I'm just too weak to cry." For some reason, that line, as well as all of the second stanza, hits really hard. *Hugs* Nicely done.
Ayshela Posted February 1, 2004 Report Posted February 1, 2004 *nod* it's hard to bear sometimes when others' view is so different than our own. the last line wraps it up especially well, totally aside from that i never thought i'd ever see anyone else say that. *hugs*
Yuki Kokoro Posted February 1, 2004 Report Posted February 1, 2004 I don't have much to add to the other comments, but felt compelled to reply. The last two stanza came through so strongly, especially: "Standing so strong for everyone/ Only to see another life end" and "I'm just too weak to cry". The surrender in that last line was potent.
Falcon2001 Posted February 2, 2004 Report Posted February 2, 2004 I don't really know what to say to this, but I do think it's an excellent poem. I didn't quite catch the rhythm pattern, but often I'm the only one who catches it in my poetry, so it's all good. The overall mood of the poem is something I can identify with, too.
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