Arashi Posted January 27, 2004 Report Posted January 27, 2004 (edited) The first bite led to this. My wife, My Children, and all of my friends, Lost to that thing called Edmond. My name is Vincent Raines. My time of death was 1709 AD but I will forever walk the earth a vampire. I wanted the madness to end, but he took my wife and kids, and I stupidly gave him my blood hoping he would end my life as well. Unfortunately, fate dealt me a losing hand and instead of giving me death he gave me life eternal and for that I will forever hunt him down until he has suffered the same way I have. Edmond's existence is the main cause of my sorrow. I have watched countless friends and family members die and I have known the pain of not being able to help them, because if I did, I would be no better then Edmond. Now and then I see glimpses of the man I used to be, but then they get shattered by the fact that I can never be the same again. I am haunted by his face when I sleep and haunted by my face when I awake. You may think living forever would be the best thing in the world, but you would be badly mistaken. The pain of loss that you would have to endure would drive you insane. Knowing that you could never have friends and that you could never fall in love. Now do you think being immortal is a dream come true? It's more like a living, breathing, nightmare. One that you can't wake up from. Everything you touch, you know, will eventually die. That is why I have lived in solitude for the past hundred. Some times the hunger of blood overpowers even the strongest mental barriers. Then you snap out of it just in time to see your victim squirm with its last breath. It sickens me to see the images. Every time I sleep I wake up to find dried blood on my shirt and fangs. Its taste is so bad that you feel like vomiting for hours and even then that doesn't help. And don't think that by not sleeping you can control it, because I have tried to and it doesn't work. There is no way to stop from passing out. The only good side is to being immortal is that it gives you time to think. Now it is time to awaken from my hundred years of thought to hunt for Edmond to make him suffer and judging by the scent in the air, I would have to say that this new world has a lot of information to offer to me about his whereabouts. So the hunt begins _______________________________________ This is the first of possibly two books I am writing. The other is a tragic romance story that I think is going to turn out very well......I hope. Please tell me what you think of this piece. I will post the other story that I started as soon as I get all the pages I wrote it on in order. And I know that it seems a lot like its from quen of the damned but when I finish the first chapter and post it on here you will see that it isn't......again, I hope. P.S.: I need all the feed back on this that I can get on how I can make it better. Edited January 27, 2004 by Arashi
Savage Dragon Posted January 27, 2004 Report Posted January 27, 2004 One thing I’d definitely be interested ion learning is why this Vincent character took a 100-year break from searching for Edmund. The story looks great so far and you cant be blamed if it sounds a little like queen of the damned since that movie tried to incorporate every single vampire movie into one plot.
Arashi Posted January 28, 2004 Author Report Posted January 28, 2004 well my reasoning behind his taking a 100 year rest was that he had followed so many leads that lead him to dead ends that he finally got so discouraged that he decided to rest not really wanting to wake up but then he hears Edmonds name mentioned and it rouses him from is rest. I plan to make that part clearer when I finally sit down and begin writing on it more.
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