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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Snypiuer

Bard
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Everything posted by Snypiuer

  1. Well, now we finally know the answer to, "Who'd win a fight between God and Lemmy Kilmister." I still say it's a trick question and the answer is, "Lemmy IS God!"
  2. Snypiuer

    Question

    What would you do if you were to discover that, since the instant you began to think, EVERYONE else on the planet was able to hear your thoughts and no one ever told you because you were the only person who couldn't hear other people's thoughts and no one wanted to make you feel bad? What if this question was a subtle hint for you to monitor your thoughts - like offering a piece of gum is a subtle hint a persons' breath stinks? What if more than one person answering this question was nothing more than a trick to make you believe this was nothing more than a thought exercise?
  3. O.K., as many of you know, we had a problem a while back with our formatting when we did an upgrade and many of our older posts lost all spacing and they turned into one big paragraph. This left the original poster having to go in and try to remember EXACTLY how they had spaced their work. I, personally, fixed a few of my own, but think I may not have done so as I originally had. I use spacing in a LOT of my work to provide some tone and rhythm, so you can see the dilemma I and others may have. Well, as I mentioned in the Holiday post, I've been stuck with an iPad and, just a little while ago, went to fix some of my old posts for the first time with it. To my surprise, all I had to do was click the Edit button and the post was automatically spaced properly! Just saved the modified post and BAM! I don't know if it's the iPad or if IPS changed something. I just wish I had known this BEFORE I "fixed" the other ones! So, give it a try and let me know if it works if you can do it before I get a computer to try it on. If it doesn't work, see if you can get ahold of an iPad. If anyone wants to give me permission, I'll try to see if I can fix their old posts for them using either the Moderator or Admin feature. I have no idea if I can, but willing to try IF I get permission from the Original Poster to do so.
  4. Snypiuer

    Holiday Season

    Well, here we are at the end of the year. I've been stuck with an iPad and haven't been able to do any skins for a while. I hope to get to a computer soon to at least set up a Christmas skin and a New Year skin. Either way, come the beginning of the year, I'll be out of commission for a while. But, will be back as soon as I can with, if all goes as planned, a lap top. Once we're ready to upgrade to IPS Version 4, I'll need it to redo all our skins. We have new members, Zatar being the newest, and new posts - for those of you who just monitor the News Forum. So say HI! and do some reading and, if you have the time, give some feedback. So, Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Merry Kwanzaa! Festive Festivus! Blessed Winter Solstice - Yule! AND ANY AND ALL HOLIDAYS I MAY HAVE FORGOTTEN OR AM UNAWARE OF!
  5. Is it just me, or is the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" nothing more than a propaganda piece to make people believe that a life of giving up EVERYTHING they ever wanted, so that everyone else around them can have THEIR dreams come true, is BETTER than actually having their own dreams come true? Does ANYONE else see the conundrum here? How is a lifetime of bitter disappointment better!? Everyone in the movie that benefits from George Baileys' sacrifices seem pretty, freaking happy while ol' George just trudges on and makes the best of what he has to work with. George had dreams and the ambition to make those dreams come true. Instead, well, let's make list of ol' Georges', so called, "Wonderful" life: 1. It starts with his idiot brother. Said brother falls through the ice and George saves him, causing George to get sick and get an ear infection - which leads to him having hearing problems. That's O.K., ol' George is a trooper. He gets older and gets a job. 2. George works at a pharmacy where his boss gets some bad news and, in his misery, mistakenly fills a prescription with poison. When George points out the mistake, his boss smacks him. Where? That's right! In his bad ear! Take that George! Save a life, go deaf in one ear! I'd like to take a break to say, I miss the days when it was O.K. to smack a kid - even if it wasn't even YOUR kid. I'd also like to point out that, if ol' George had learned his lesson from this incident, that no good deed goes unpunished, he wouldn't have had a lifetime of disappointment - so MAYBE ol' George just got what he deserved. Back to the list! 3. George gets older and saves his money. He's going to travel! George is going overseas! George is going to college! Georges' dad has a stroke and the board of directors for the Savings and Loans, his dad started, won't keep it open unless he, George, takes his dad's' place! LUCKY GEORGE! 4. It's O.K. ol' George is a man with a plan. He'll postpone his dreams and use the money he saved to send his idiot brother to college so that HE can come back and run the Savings and Loans. George is a freaking GENIUS! Georges' idiot brother isn't such an idiot and comes back from college with a wife and says (I'm paraphrasing here - YEAH, that's what I'm calling it!), "So, George, buddy, I'm getting laid regularly and her old man is giving me a job, sooo . . . thanks for the edumacashun and SEE YA SUCKER!" At this point, George should just head to the bridge. 5. George decides if he's going to be stuck running the Savings and Loans, he might as well get laid regularly too. So, he gets married and plans to use the money he was saving to travel the world (that is, until his idiot brother showed up and flushed THAT dream down the toilet), to honeymoon in New York and Bermuda. It's not traveling the world, but it's something - and you can't deny the man his honeymoon! Wait for it . . . that's right! There's a run on the banks and, instead of just letting the Savings and Loans get bought out, he uses the honeymoon money to cover the deposits. You hear that? That's the sound of an overworked toilet flushing another of ol' George Baileys' dreams. 6. This one is ALL on George. He creates a residential development of nice homes and, basically, sells them at cost TO THE SAME PEOPLE THAT FORCED HIM TO USE HIS HONEYMOON MONEY TO COVER THEIR DEPOSITS! How about make a bit of a profit George? No? Take a rest toilet, that one ol' George deserves to eat! 7. Here's another one all on George. He's offered a job making more money than he ever could hope for and he turns it down - George, your freaking wife is pregnant! Arghh! 8. War! Yay! It's not ideal, but there is travel and you can pretty much count on adventure. And, who's going to say anything or judge ol' George for signing up? Why, it's his duty as an American! Wait a minute . . . get your 4F butt back to the Savings and Loans George! You half-deaf . . . 9. George gets to be the air raid warden while friends and family become war heroes and rich from selling parts to the military. At least he's getting laid - 4 kids.You go George! 10. Finally, after all that, and ol' George is resigned to just living the rest of his life stuck in the same town he was born in and never left, working at a job he never wanted, what happens? His uncle, the TRUE idiot of the family absent-mindedly places the Savings and Loans $8,000 bank deposit in a folded newspaper and HANDS it to the banker who hates George and wants nothing more than to see him thrown in jail - actually, it wouldn't be a stretch to say he REALLY wants ol' George dead! George is going to prison! He doesn't want to, but let's face facts here, does ANYTHING in ol' Georges' life point to him NOT being locked up? Hey, George, at least you'll finally get out of Bedford Falls and, not to worry, you'll STILL be getting laid regularly - whether you want to or not! All this leads to George realizing he's worth more dead than alive, you know what? I know I said "FINALLY" on the last one, but there's more. 11. George decides to give up his "DREAM", of just existing, in order to save the Savings and Loans. That's right, he's going to give up LIVING so that the business doesn't get shut down and people aren't thrown in jail and his family doesn't have to be ashamed that he was locked up. Get that straight, it wasn't because he was worried he was going to end up having the back of his head shaved and the face of a woman tattooed on it that his cell-mate called Martha. No, IT WAS TO SAVE THE BUSINESS AND TO SAVE HIS FAMILIES' REPUTATION. 12. You would THINK that would be enough. No. No, it's not. An angel shows up to help ol' George? No. The angel has a dream. A dream to, one day, have wings! What better way to get them than to rub ol' Georges' face in the fact that he had to suffer through life long disappointment so that OTHERS could, not only, do what he was only allowed to dream of, but to live FAR better lives than him. And, on top of that, make him believe he's being SELFISH for wishing he had never been born instead of living a life of broken dreams that has lead him to the point where he is WILLING TO KILL HIMSELF! Go for it Clarence, get them wings! 13. Hmmmm, 13 . . . figures. Final, finally. George sees the error of his selfish, selfish ways, more clearly than a reluctant guest in Stockholm and realizes he's the "RICHEST MAN IN TOWN" because everyone is willing to help him. George, George, George, you poor, pathetic, delusional fool. These same people will throw the fact that they gave you a few dollars to help keep you out of jail, right in your face the VERY first time they're late making a payment on a loan you've ALREADY made to them. And, your rich friend, the one who could pay the $8,000 outright, if he wanted to, only gave you a line of credit. You'll have to pay back everything you borrow from it. George! You will NEVER be able to afford to leave Bedford Falls! You will die there and the last thing you're going to think on your death bed is, "I should have let that idiot drown!" So, there we have it. A "WONDERFUL LIFE" where the hero of our story lives a life of disappointment and the villain, who is ALREADY the richest man in town gets $8,000 for free, in a day and age when $8,000 could buy you a freaking huge house.
  6. O.K., that one was weird. For some reason, I got a vision of the scene from Mickey Rooney's "Boys' Town" where all the boys and Father Flanagan are marching up to the bad guys' hideout. BUT, and here's the weird part, it was to the song "Babes in Arms" from his and Judy Garlands movie "Babes in Arms". You would THINK that I would, at least, see the marching scene that is ACTUALLY done to the song from the movie the song comes from . . . weird, right!?
  7. *Snypiuer walks meerily through the Valley of the Gribbles, singing* The wonderful thing about Gribbles Is that Gribbles are . . . AAAARRRGGHHHHHHH!!!! THEY GOT ME!!!! AAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!!! GET THEM OFF!!!!! AAARRRGGHHHHH!!!!!!
  8. I heard the song "Silver Bells", in my head, while I read this!
  9. I like it, but wonder if it wouldn't work better as 2 separate works? I see how you come to an awareness and, eventually, overcome. It works, but would it be more powerful if separated? I'm not sure. Maybe this is actually a "middle" piece where you chronicle the end of your coming to awareness and the beginning of overcoming . . . Just tossing it out there - THOUGHT GRENADE!
  10. If it is indefabigle proof you seek, I give you Neb the Umbiquous! *At this point, Snypiuer pulls from his pocket, a haggard looking mouse which he retrieved from the rafters above the Tavern. He places the mouse on a small chair he has placed on a table and whispers to it, "You sit there and don't try to run off, or I'll staple your tail to that chair again!" The mouse lets out a small squeak and, with fear in his eyes, sits upright with his front paws clenched tightly together against his chest* Snypiuer: Do you, Neb the Umbiquous, swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you Fimple!? Neb: *The very frightened and confused mouse repsponds* squeak Snypiuer: Very well. First question, are you, in fact, the entity known as Neb the Umbiquous? Neb: squeak Snypiuer: Good. Now, is it true you are acquainted with every nook and cranny of the Keep of the Pen is Mightier than the Sword? Neb: squeak Snypiuer: Ahhh! So it would be fair to say you are an expert on the ins and outs of said Keep and its' inhabitants? Neb: squeak Snypiuer: Let the record show that Neb the Umbiquous IS an expert on the Keep of the Pen is Mightier than the Sword AND its' inhabitants! Neb: squeak? Snypiuer: Now, Neb . . . I may call you Neb? Neb: squeak Snypiuer: Oh! I'm sorry than, MR. UMBIQUOUS! Neb: squeak? Snypiuer: So, Mr. Umbiquous, as an expert, can you say, DEFINITIVELY, that Snypiuer DOES, in deed, lurk within, AND, if so, does he lurk within, ALWAYS!? Neb: squeak THERE you go! STRAIGHT from the expert! I, not only, lurk within, but I do so . . . ALWAYS. *While Snypiuer, ungraciously, claims this as proof, the very frightend and confused mouse makes a break for it and scurries away* AND, while I could bring forth many, MANY more experts and produce MASSIVE amounts of evidence to further prove my statement, I believe the mere stature of Neb the Umbiquous is enough to . . . Neb? Where'd he go!?
  11. Snypiuer lurks within. Always.
  12. Story so far: Who's the infiltrator? Snypiuer: I'm thinking . . . it might be you. James: Nooo . . . I'm PRETTY sure it's you.
  13. I've never played, but have been wanting to try. So, be willing if everyone else was O.K. with someone who has no idea what they're doing!
  14. Somewhere in the Keep of the Pen is Mightier than the Sword, Snypiuer, in his custodian uniform and still in search of creaky noises that he is unsure if they are coming from his old bones or from somewhere within the Keep, stops his slow, hunched-over shuffle and looks around, confused. He now wonders whether or not his thoughts are echoing in his skull or if someone is just messing with him. He continues his slow, shuffling search, muttering to himself, "I've either been alone here so long that I've gone completely off my noodle or someone wants a story about how an old, dried-up janitor put his foot . . . muttermuttermutter . . . I'll show them what a . . . grumblegrumblegrumble . . . HA!"
  15. Next line . . . NEXT line . . . line . . . LINE . . . An absent minded theater actor, is NEVER fine. Next line: I'll be removing my pants now
  16. Never mind this entry, just continue . . . A peculiar way to start a tale. It seems - Too long . . . and yet . . . too short. Next line: Wait . . . I slept through the Rapture!?
  17. O.K., Snypiuer has written off and on about things he has done (or MAY have done - things he will neither confirm nor deny) that one COULD consider to be "BAD". Here's another: Snypiuer goes to store. At check-out counter, bag boy is annoying checkout girl. Bag boy is, obviously, high school kid and so is check-out girl. Check-out girl is decent looking. Now, Snypiuer is in NO way a looker. He is not a Brad Pitt or a George Clooney and he is DEFINITELY no where even NEAR the scale of the raw sexuality that is a Steve Buscemi. But he does know looks and she was . . . O.K. Anyways: Snypiuer: Dude, why don't you just ask her out? Bag Boy: Huh!? Snypiuer: She's cute, ask her out. Bag Boy: What!? Snypiuer: Let's face it, you OBVIOUSLY like her or you wouldn't be annoying her so much. Bag Boy: I'm, I'm, I'm . . . just Snypiuer: Look. We both know that, even if she wasn't cute, you're young, you're horney, that's enough. Your hormone saturated brain wants her. Ask her out. What's the worst that can happen? Bag Boy: ahhh *With a look of shock, fear and EXTREME embarrassment, he quickly walks away* Snypiuer: Well, he'll either ask you out or leave you alone from now on. Just remember, they're ALL horney until they're about . . . you know what? Don't even TRY to put an age to it, just remember that they're ALL horney. Check-out girl: *Wide-eyed with a 'what-just-happened?' look* umm, thanks? Snypiuer: No prob, you have a WONDERFUL evening!
  18. O.K., Snypiuer will NOT go see 'American Sniper' at the theater. Why? 'Cause Snypiuer is a MAN DAMN IT! And a man does NOT cry in public at a movie! Not that he WOULD cry! It's just that Snypiuer is VERY patriotic . . . and . . . he has allergies . . . and . . . stuff . . . HE'S A MAN DAMN IT! He will watch it on DVD . . . alone. A MAN YOU HEAR! A MAN!!!
  19. Snypiuer

    HAPPY NEW YEAR!

    Well, I threw together a quick New Year skin for you! Not great and the CBox did NOT play nice! I will put CBox back to normal in a couple days. The New Year skin is the default for now and I'll switch that when I put CBox back to normal. Hope you enjoy it. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!!
  20. Snypiuer

    Skins

    Hi, we've added a few skins that are lighter and we're working on redoing all skins. If you go to the bottom of the page, on the left you'll find 'Change Theme', click on that and a list of skins will appear. If the skin starts with 'Pen' that's a new or updated skin. We're keeping the logos simple for now because there are a LOT of skins to come. We'll put them up and see which ones you like - A poll will be set up when we get more running. Once we have a good idea of which ones to keep, we'll upgrade the logos to fit each theme. If you have any comments or suggestions on ANY skin before the poll is up, PLEASE go ahead and let me know either here or with a PM!
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  21. I've moved back to the Pen - Myspace is dead, Facebook is too much drama, and so I've come home. With the help of a few others, we've been been rearranging a number of things, applying board and security updates. Along the way, we discovered that the formatting in many of the older posts has gone. This isn't an issue for most of the works, but is of concern for poetry, where the format is part of the mood and message. If you have posted a poem or song in the Banquet Hall, and can spare the time, it would be very nice if you could come by the Pen and reformat your works. They'll either be in the Banquet Hall, or under the Vaults of Time, in the Banquet Hall Archives. If you've forgotten your username, and/or password, please email me at peredhil31@hotmail.com, and let me know. If you have forgotten your username, it would help if you remember the email you used. I can update emails and passwords for you, if that would help. I'm currently dedicating two to three hours six days a week to the Pen, and look to be doing so for the foreseeable future. If you haven't the time to reformat your Poetry, let me know and I'll make my best guesses as to what you intended. respectfully, Peredhil
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  22. I like this. But, have to admit. I'm the guy who yells, "JUMP!"
  23. Chicken, you can BBQ a chicken (but the egg came first!) Chili: Red or Green?
  24. Dear Pennites, It may or may not be implied (though it shall neither be confirmed nor denied) that Snypiuer has just been cleared to reveal that, for approximately 40 years now, world governments (headed by U.S. Intelligence) have been secretly researching a 'Holiday' mystery. It has been conducted under a Top Secret Govt. Commission known as the "SIISSL - Scientific Inquisition Investigating Seasonal Salutations in Lyrics". Since the early 1970's, a seasonal phenomenon has been studied, in depth, by the greatest minds the Human race has ever produced, using the most advanced scientific tools available (including proto-type equipment based on theoretical extra-dimensional sciences) and the FULL resources of the most clandestine Black Book agencies. Once again, neither confirming or denying any ACTUAL costs, it may or may not be ASSUMED that, after exhausting irreplaceable resources, uncountable man-hours, unimaginable monetary expenditures, years of countless experiments and even more deaths and horrible disfigurements in conjunction with said experiments, a (non-official) preliminary conclusion has been arrived at. And, at this point in time, this commission is unofficially ready to, off-the-record, neither confirm nor deny that it is possible that, all aspects and conditions being equal, a non-binding consensus has been reached by a minority of peripheral investigators, pertaining to the core focus of said commission. This being: It is possible (in an unofficial and non-binding way) that, MAYBE, if taken in certain context, it can be inferred that, depending on one's own comprehension of the subject, that, when viewed and considered in its entirety, it seems that it could very well be that one 'Jose Feliciano' may or may not intend to, or have a desire to, 'wish' specific or non-specific individuals, what may or may-not be considered and/or referred to as a 'Merry Christmas' and/or a 'Happy New Year' Keep in mind that this is purely a preliminary conclusion and that the actual final 'official' findings are decades, if not centuries, from being confirmed - if, in deed, they are even possible to quantify. As such, it is best to simply disregard the entire preceding message and, in the future (perhaps - if further advancement is noted) a fuller, more complete, unofficial, non-binding preliminary conclusion may or may not be neither confirmed nor denied in either a private and/or public briefing, if at all. It is also to be noted that this message, in and of itself, is in no way intended to, nor should it be implied in any way what so ever, that being made public, as-such, neither gives credence nor substantiates, in any way, the existence or possible existence of ANY organization, either covert or public, which, may or may not, in any way, shape or form be involved with investigating any, or all, possible or hypothetical Seasonal Salutations or ANYTHING in conjunction to, pertaining to, or related to (in any way) aforementioned Salutations. And, therefor, should not, in any way, shape or form be construed to do so, by any individual, group, organization or network of individuals, groups or organizations. This may or may not be Snypiuer, neither confirming nor denying a desire, or intent, to wish any or all members of the Mighty Pen (and/or their families and/or loved ones), a Merry Christmas and/or a Happy New Year!
  25. Wood, with a bear skin rug! Wombat or Capybara?
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