reverie

60/40 bash/swooper... in poetry and in term papers... I generally edit on the fly, but also often write whole sections with little editting, once I get going... Swoopers more promenant when I'm in ramble or improv mode. Also in term papers I often like the make the biblography first, so i can just insert the citiations as needed mid stream... Most work needs massive editing once complete and may need several drafts before i'm happy with it... rev...

Yes, Congratulations!!! Hmm, but some strange reason, I thought you guys were already engaged. My mistake. Big Hugs though, rev...

Aimee: Oh I know it's the correct spelling, because it's also the way that one of my favorite singers/song writers spells hers: aimeemann.com gl, rev...

beautifully put, but sorry doesn't ring a bell. I checked you're past posts, if you're still looking wrenwind, i think she's still around??? If you're looking for AOD ppls, can't help you there either, I ran in different mage circles... Love the spelling of your name though, rev....

Clever and hilarious as always Wyv... cheers, rev...

Well it's a comfort level thing Zool. Like what your comfortable talking about with your friends is probably very different from what you talk about with your boss or a casual associate... Once you've established a rapport with another person, it's much harder to offend them, because they generally know you well enough to know if you're really joking, being serious, sarcastic etc.

Hello, all, I would like to wish everyone a Happy Festivus. Quoting for Wikipedia: Festivus Festivus is a nondenominational holiday featured in an episode of Seinfeld, a popular American television sitcom of the 1990s. The holiday was a plot device in episode number 166 of the show, entitled "The Strike", which first aired on December 18, 1997. Many people, influenced or inspired by Seinfeld, now celebrate the holiday, in varying degrees of seriousness. Some do it religously, others do it in good tidings in their respect to Seinfeld. According to Seinfeld, Festivus is celebrated each year on December 23, but many people celebrate it other times, often in early December. Its slogan is "A Festivus for the rest of us!" An aluminum pole is generally used in lieu of a Christmas tree or other holiday decoration. Those attending participate in the "Airing of Grievances" which is an opportunity for all to vent their hostilities toward each other, and after a Festivus dinner, The Feats of Strength are performed. Traditionally, Festivus is not over until the head of the household is wrestled to the floor and "pinned." Originally a Scandinavian holiday celebrating the day before the "Present" and the "Future" filled with hope. A day to be honored much in the way "Fat Tuesday" is at the beginning of the Christian Lenten Season. Contents 1 "The Strike" 2 Main elements of Festivus 3 The Festivus Miracle 4 Origin 5 Other references "The Strike" The character Frank Costanza (played by Jerry Stiller) created Festivus as an alternative holiday in response to the commercialization of Christmas. He explained its origins during the episode to the character Cosmo Kramer (played by Michael Richards), as related in the following dialogue: Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way. Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll? Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born . . . a Festivus for the rest of us! Cosmo Kramer: That must've been some kind of doll. Frank Costanza: She was. In the episode, Kramer had become interested in resurrecting the holiday after hearing the plight of his friend—Frank Costanza's son—George (played by Jason Alexander), who used the holiday celebration he hated in his youth as a defensive excuse to his employer, Kruger (played by Daniel Von Bargen). George had been confronted by Kruger after handing out cards for Christmas to his fellow employees stating a donation had been made to a fake charity (invented by George) called The Human Fund (with the slogan "Money For People") in lieu of exchanging Christmas presents. George defended himself saying that he feared persecution for his beliefs, for not celebrating Christmas. Attempting to call his bluff, Kruger came home with George to see Festivus in action. Garry Newman has cancer. Main elements of Festivus The Airing of Grievances: The Festivus celebration includes four major components: The Festivus Pole: The Costanzas' tradition begins with a bare aluminum pole (originally a Scandinavian phallic symbol), which Frank praises for its "very high strength-to-weight ratio." During Festivus, an unadorned aluminum pole is displayed. The pole was chosen apparently in opposition to the commercialization of highly decorated Christmas trees, because it is "very low-maintenance," and also because the holiday's patron, Frank Costanza, "finds tinsel distracting." Festivus Dinner: The Festivus dinner menu is flexible, but it should consist of filling, non-holiday comfort food (no turkey, duck, goose, or ham). The televised dinner featured what may have been meatloaf or spaghetti in a red sauce. (Presumably, an entree in a red sauce is more festive.) Kruger took a flask out from his jacket and took a swig; so one might interpret that drinking is optional. The Airing of Grievances: At the Festivus dinner, each participant tells friends and family of all the instances where they disappointed him or her that year. The Feats of Strength: The head of the family tests his or her strength against one participant of the head's choosing. Festivus is not considered over until the head of the family has been pinned to the ground. A participant is allowed to decline to attempt to pin the head of the family only if they have something better to do instead. The Festivus Miracle While not an official element of the holiday or its celebration, the phenomenon of the Festivus Miracle should not be overlooked. When, at one point in the episode, two sleazy betting-window guys from the off track betting parlor call H&H Bagels (Elaine's fake phone number) for Elaine Benes, and Kramer (who was on strike against H&H, but went inside the store because he had to use the bathroom) answers the phone. Kramer explains that he is about to see Elaine and invites the bookies to join him for Festivus. Kramer enthusiastically declares "It's a Festivus miracle!" Kramer reports another Festivus Miracle when Gwen finds Jerry at the Costanza home, despite Kramer's previous directions to Gwen. At best, a "Festivus miracle" is a coincidence rather than a genuine miracle. Origin The Festivus idea came to the show through writer Dan O'Keefe. His father, Daniel O'Keefe, had discovered the Festivus holiday in a book that outlined obscure (mostly European) holidays published in 1966, included were many of the features later included in the Seinfeld episode. The father was inspired in part by the Samuel Beckett play Krapp's Last Tape, whose protagonist tapes himself speaking at different times in his life. The original Airing of Grievances was spoken into a tape recorder, and the O'Keefe family retains some of the tapes. (The father's career as a Reader's Digest editor meant internal politics of that organization are prominently featured; external grievances were permitted.) The O'Keefe tradition did not have a set date (the original holiday took place in the "Past" day before the presentation of presents which fostered altruism in the community when supplies were diminished, and the "Future" which represented the hope of the coming year - the original date was usually on December 23), but would take place in response to family tension, "any time from December to May" (Salkin). The phrase "a Festivus for the rest of us" also derived from an O'Keefe family event, the death of the elder O'Keefe's mother. This is not dissimilar from an Irish wake. The holiday made it onto Seinfeld after the writing team was amused by O'Keefe's retelling. The elder O'Keefe wrote the 1982 book Stolen Lightning: A Social Theory of Magic (ISBN 0826400590); the work deals with idiosyncratic ritual and its social significance, a theme with obvious relevance to Festivus tradition. Other references At least two contemporary books (including the original book of the subject)on the holiday exist: Festivus: The Holiday for the Rest of Us (ISBN 0446696749) by Allen Salkin, with a foreword by Jerry Stiller, released on October 26, 2005, and The Real Festivus (ISBN 0399532293) by Daniel O'Keefe, with an introduction by Jason Alexander released on November 1, 2005. During the 2000 NFL regular season, Baltimore Ravens coach Brian Billick forbade anyone to use the "P-word" (presumably "postseason" or "playoffs") until the team actually played in it. In its place, the word "Festivus" was used. The Super Bowl was then referred to as "Festivus Maximus." The Ravens went on to defeat the New York Giants, 34-7, in Super Bowl XXXV on January 28, 2001. Connecticut College in New London, CT has a Festivus celebration in lieu of a Christmas celebration. Scandinavian students are especially honored by everyone wearing blonde wigs. Presumably unaware of the coincidence, the Brisbane Marketing organization has adopted the name "Festivus" to refer to its summer holidays program of events in Brisbane. The Wagner Companies of Milwaukee, Wisconsin began manufacturing Festivus Poles for the 2005 season. Taken from the book, "Obscure Holidays Around the World", (ISBN 3486952110) [Ettinger Publishing,] 1966. Author: Jacque Wangman. "Festivus" was the name of an ice cream flavor (mostly gingerbread flavoring) of Ben and Jerry's ice cream in 2001. Named after the fictitious holiday, the flavor has since been renamed "Gingerbread Cookie." "Festivus" is the name of a red wine produced by Grape Ranch Vineyards in Oklahoma. "Oh Festivus" (also known as "The Festivus Song") was first sung in Dallas, Texas bars and taverns in the 2004-2005 holiday season. It is adopted from the original Scandinavian songs of celebration. [1] In 2004, the University of Richmond renamed their annual pig roast event "Festivus" as part of an effort to change the event's image. For the last two years, an award-winning brewpub in Minneapolis, MN, Minneapolis Town Hall Brewery has released a beer called Festivus to celebrate the holiday season. Columbia University's Living-Learning Center holds a Festivus celebration during first semester finals in honor of Seinfeld. Drew University holds a midnight breakfast during exam week in celebration of Festivus with all the elements of Festivus including the Aluminum Pole, Feats of Strength, and Airing of Grievances. The University of Wisconsin-Madison's first Festivus celebration was organized by Andy Pascaly in 2003. Since then, the gathering has grown to about 300 participants in 2004. In December 2005 some non-Christian groups in Australia (apparently unaware of the irony) suggested a replacement name for Christmas which was deemed "politically incorrect" as it "excluded" too many people. Their suggested replacement for Christmas was a celebration to be called "Festive".

Ya know. Actually, I find that someone having the need to previse their beliefs before wishing someone else well as offensive. I see nothing wrong with wishing someone a Merry Christmas, if you believe in it, and or if you know that the person that you are greeting believes in it. Besides Christmas is pretty commercial now-a-days most americans ppl celebrate it as a folk or secular occurance. I never saw one elf in the bible. Like, if I've some jewish friends. That will be celebrating Hannaku, I might say, Happy Hannaku or however you spell it. Like wise with Soltise or Qwanza, or what have you. Usually, I just say a general Merry Christmas/Happy New Year or enjoy the holidays. The only time, I would be offended, is if you forced someone else to take part in a celebration against their will, like forcing an Orthodox Jewish person or a Jehovah's Witness to take part in the Naitivity Scene or to write an essay of what Christmas means to them. A simple greeting is inkeeping with the ideal of freedom of expression and speech. The current diabocal over the supposed war on christmas in the U.S.A. is simple a smoke screen set to further split my already divided nation. If anything people in general which derive from all faiths, creeds, levels of affluence, or lack there of... are fighting a war against fundamentalism, not the freedom of religion. And the rise of widespread fundamentalism worldwide, like the Nationalism of early twentienth centuary, is the grease propelling the war and hate machines of our century. God help us all and Merry Christmas. rev...

Merry X-mas to you too Signe. It's been too long. I miss my little Satellite Muse... Don't be a stranger, rev...

I don't know if you intended it or not, but you're not that far away from a traditional Ballad Form, ya know. I mean your stanzas are already arranged to line up with the Ballad Form if as Peredhil observed you smoothed out the meter some. Ballad stanzas are usually neat sing-songy lyrical things once you get the tune down. I try to think of meter of the first line, being answered by the 2nd line. da-dum, da-dum, da-dum, da-dum. [iambic octo-meter? ] da-dum, da-dum,da-dum. [iambic hexa-meter?] da-dum, da-dum,da-dum, da-dum. [iambic octo-meter? ] da-dum, da-dum,da-dum. [iambic hexa-meter? ] With lines ending with a Rhyme scheme: a,b,c,b Of course, you can always vary the form, but it can serve as a good guilde or lanching off point. There are even traditional variations, like I did a six-line stanza ballad for a school assignment last week, so that's why I'm somewhat familar with this particular form. Like just for fun, lets see what one of your stanza might look like if slightly tweak to fit this form. In Perfection's mold I was cast. (might not be straight iamb, I have a thing for triplets.) No flaw in me is seen To speak at all, was out of place And thus was viewed obscene. (little archaic, I know, but am just trying to get the idea across.) plus, you can also have more fun by attempting some internal ryhmes in the odd lines. (not an easy thing to force, best when it just flows that way, if at all) Let's see if I can pull if off: I am perfect in mold select. No flaw in me is seen To speak my case, spoke not of grace, And thus was viewed obscene. .... Well anyway nothing wrong with your poem, just highlighting some potenials I saw. take care, rev...

oh that "base system" got it Q. Let's see how can I say and still remain within the parameters of the ever so polite pen. Terms usually used by guys refering to girls. 1st base = kiss 2nd base = activities under the shirt 3rd base = Carnal knowledge. Home run = well you get the picture. Think the metaphores are just left overs for all those puritans that landed on our shores way back when, and I bet the victorians had a hand in it too... rev.

Hmm, but if the adversaries of the "voiceless" (e.g. women) found the need to interrupt their protest, then indeed the women did have a voice albeit only momentary and outside of the normal political channels. But I do see your point. I think what's confusing me, is the persona's point of view. For some reason my brain wants to read the poem from the opposing side, but still apply the same sentiments. thus = confused revery. However, cast in this new light, I can see things a little more clearly. Hmm, in the first line, I would recommend exchanging "Silencing" for "Interupting." I think that would give the first line more edge with an ironic bend to it. ... rev.

base system? Am sorry, am not familar with that phrase? Please elaborate.

I like it Vlad. I have to read sooo many of these this year in my creative writing class, and I can honestly say this best one I've seen. Oh and here's a rather long explanation of a Villanelle from: http://www.writing-world.com/poetry/villanelle.shtml Poetic Forms: The Villanelle by Conrad Geller One traditional form of poetry that can be fun to write, is technically easy compared to the most challenging forms, and often surprises the poet with its twists and discoveries, is the villanelle. Villanelles have been around for at least three hundred years. Its name derives from the Italian villa, or country house, where noblemen went to refresh themselves, perhaps dally with the locals, and imagine that they were back to nature. It seems to have grown out of native songs, with their frequent refrains and complex rhyming. The first thing you need for a villanelle is a pair of rhyming lines that are the heart of your meaning. Here are the two key lines from The House on the Hill, by E. A. Robinson: They are all gone away There is nothing more to say. Now put an unrhymed line between these two, to make a three-line stanza: They are all gone away, The House is shut and still, There is nothing more to say. The next stanza begins with a line that rhymes with the basic couplet, a line that rhymes with the middle line you added, and (this is the key to this form) the first line of the couplet repeated: Through broken walls and gray The winds blow bleak and shrill: They are all gone away. The next stanza has a first line rhyming with "away" and "say," followed by a line rhyming with "still," and then the second line of the couplet repeated: Nor is there one today To speak them good or ill: There is nothing more to say. You see how the two lines of the base couplet become more and more meaningful with each repetition. That is why the success of the form depends so much on the careful selection of the couplet. The poem then goes on this way for a total of five three-line stanzas, alternating the two base lines, and ends with a sixth stanza that adds the second line of the stanza one more time: Why is it then we stray Around the shrunken sill? They are all gone away. And our poor fancy-play For them is wasted skill: There is nothing more to say. There is ruin and decay In the House on the Hill: They are all gone away, There is nothing more to say. Beautiful,as the gloomy atmosphere deepens with each repetition. Here is another, much lighter villanelle by a more contemporary poet, Sondra Ball. Her subject is the villanelle itself, and the form is strictly adhered to, though she does allow herself some irregular rhymes: Musical and sweet, the villanelle, like light reflected in a gentle rhyme, moves to the ringing of a silver bell, its form creating soft and tender spells. Like the singing of distant silver chimes, musical and sweet, the villanelle flows through the heart, and builds a magic spell from sunlight and from shadows, and, sublime, moves to the ringing of a silver bell. It never arcs into the sharp loud yell of vast pipe organs. Soft its climb. Musical and sweet, the villanelle, like a tiny and translucent shell catching sunlight in the summer time, moves to the ringing of a silver bell. Soft and gentle, tender and so frail, like light pouring through petals of the lime, musical and sweet, the villanelle moves to the ringing of a silver bell. Notice, too, that in this form poets can choose longer or shorter lines. Robinson's poem has three beats to a line, while Ball's has the more traditional five (ta-DUM, ta-DUM, ta-DUM, ta-DUM, ta-DUM). This hardy and flexible poetic form has had a resurgence in the last hundred years. Probably the best of the poems produced during this time is Dylan Thomas's reflection on the death of his father, Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night. And for good measure it's probably one of the best poems of the twentieth century of any kind, period: Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage, against the dying of the light. Though Wise men at their end know dark is right, Because their words had forked no lightning they Do not go gentle into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight, And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way, Do not go gentle into that good night. Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. And you, my father, there on the sad height, Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

that's a good observation, Try. you're prolly right. Sorry just couldn't resist. Well, i'm off to go fight traffic. For some crazy reason, I fill compelled to criss-cross a couple of states. Happy Festivus, everyone. rev...

I agree with Q. I never heard or saw anyone ever use the abbreviations "BTW, BRB, LOL, J/K, IMHO, ROTFLMAO, TTYL, GTG, ROX, SUX, Thanx, CYA, HIYA, TY, @" before I started using the internet. I recall frequently having to ask ppl what they meant, since chat rooms didn't provide the best context clues or have a marked absence of body language. Oh "ppl" and "prolly" are some other one's I never saw before. Same goes for "w/" for with, plus we can't forget the increased use of "..." elispses I blame ICQ. Now, it's true the words/phrases "be right back, by the way, just kidding, and in my opinion(not many ppl say "humble" in informal speech), talk to you later, Got to go, rocks, sucks, see-you or see-you-later, at, and thank you," existed long before the internet. But like I said, I never say anyone EVER abbreviate them outside of the internet. "Hiya" is interesting I think. It did exist before the internet, but not really as it's own entity. It was just kind of an exaggerated way of saying "Hi" when you might have got too excited. Or even a syllabic stumbled when trying to say "hi, how are you doing" too fast. If you rushed the words your ear would translate it into, "Hiya, how ya doing" or "how ya'll doing" if your from the south. It's got kind of a lyric quality to it. "Hi ya" trying to parallel the "how ya." And of course there were the cheezy cowboy movies attempting poor imatations of native american speech, but that "Hiya" as a seperate meaning, and also so does the Karate variat. Really, the only common abbreviations/acronyms, I recall existing before the net was "b/c" for "because," "K or ok" for "okay," and "&" for "and."

Happy b-day Sweet.

well pretty much, you're just like me, you're in the middle, so you got some aspects of both generation... Consider yourself a hybrid, and like any good hybrid you have to learn to deal with not ever being fully able to totally fit in to either group that birthed you... but you can take some comfort in your extra strong immune system, and if you lucky you might get a mixed and unexpected range abilities that one ever could have anticipated. So take pride in your hybrid status. I do. Say it, scream it: I am TIGER WOODS!!! Well, not exactly, but you get the picture. Plus, you guys have a destinct advantage over me, I'm on the tail end of my generation, so I'll always be playing catch up. While you guys are at the beginning of yours, so you get to blaze the trail. So go out and be the best little prioneer you can be... Heh, but honestly, all this talk of labels, is really just sometime that historains and lay ppl use to compartmentalize our thoughts. We don't need them, and no one ever exactly fits into any prescribed mold. So I wouldn't lament, being a part of Gen Y, but not feeling apart of it. It's just a contrived notion some people thought up for the sake of convenience. If you want a label, make your own, or if really need someone to give you one. Then Bam! I dub thee Nintendo Kids. Or children of the 80's. Or Kids that grew up in warm Green Glow of the Apple 2. Abort, Retry, Ignore... I myself was one of these, but I was also an Altaria Kid, I recall ppl talked a lot about Famicons too, but that's just the Japanese name/version for Nintendo, so am not sure what all the fuss was about... Hmm, when i look back at my life in terms of video games systems, it really makes pause, and wonder about validity of our collective first-world cultures and the future progress of humanity in general, ya know. Jeeze, no wonder everyone hates us... I suppose the Romans had their own forms of meaningless entertaiment... Dang, we really are doomed aren't we... rev_out.

Interestingly enough, as I doing a last minute cram session with some of my classmates, today, one of the freshmen girls (college type), jumped up enthusiastically, and yelled out, "BRB!" ...then took off down the hall. She didn't say "be-right-back" or "bathroom break," she said: "B" "R" "B." Aye, 'tis a brave new world indeed. rev...

Oh yeah, I forgot Webster's rebellion against British spelling... good call Q.

Yeah, Katz you on the cusp... 1981 is usually the agreed upon cut off date for Gen X. Where the first wave of Gen X has just reached middle age, the first wave of the Digital Generation is just old enough to have generally just graduated college and a maybe a short graduate school... So for the most part Gen X found their voice thoughtout the 80's and early 90's. Moreover, the last wave of Babyboomer's still dominated the youth culture of the 70's just like last wave of Gen X of dominated the youth of the 90's...(Using music as example: the dominance of Hip Hop and Grudge revolution came out of the fading embers of Gen X, just like Punk, Disco, and Rockabillie came out of the last wave of the Boomers...) Concurrently, the Babyboomers also finally came to power and took over the establishment in the early 90's as while. Like Clinton and Bush the younger are Baby-boomers who came of age in the Vietnam era. While Bush Senior and Reagon fought in WWII so were part of the supposed "greatest generation." If trends repeat themselves, then Gen X (if we step up.)should just be coming to power within a decade or so... Most Boomers right now have already past middle age, so retirement for the majority of them will be becoming a reality sooner than later. Hmm, so Gen D's just getting it's feet wet, and the Generation after Gen D is just being born right now. Though some new age groups have already dubbed the children on the mid 90's to present the indigo children for their supposed vast increase metaphysical and pyshic abilities. I doubt that label will endure though. I'm betting more than likely a new name will crop up based on the millenum or sometime do with the current state of international events. Like if we have a WWIII or sometime in the next ten years or so to right now, Gen D would be fighting most of it (That's whose's in Iraq now. All three waves of Gen X are in charge, and 1st and 2nd wave of Gen D are the green recruits or canon fodder, if you will...) If we have one in 20 years, the Gen after Gen D will be fighting it. Well, that a lot nonsence, but was fun to write. rev...

Hmm, I wonder if the Digital Generation or Generation D (i've never heard this before 'til you mentioned it) will surplant the name Generation Y. I think it be good thing if it did. As I'm part of the crowd born at the tail end of being considered Generation X, and I often looked on at the up and coming Gen Y with curiosity. Well, the label really... Gen X's Identity was firmly set before I even hit my teens, and the middle to upper end of my Gen is coming to grips with growing out of their respective primes. And even being on the peripheral, I can see how we earned our name. We were the gen that basically rose up and said, to our baby-boomer fore-fathers: "What the #!$!$, you can't start a cultural-revolution then opt-out of halfway...How the @#@$ do you go from being a Hippie in the sixties to a stock broker in the 80's. Does no one else see the hypocrasy in that???" And they answered us, "Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. Sorry 'bout the Enviroment, Drugs, AIDS, and OIL btw; but you kids are smart we're sure you figure it all out...just like we did with communism..." And we were like, "Whoa, that's some heavy stuff, hmm, we need to take an extended break to mull all this stuff over..." So we invented MTV, Maxium, Video games, and the Internet to distract ourselves from the insanity that was reality. So with all that being said, I always thought it odd that the Baby Boomers went ahead and named Generation Y. Like, they haven't even done anything yet to define themselves, which I think is unfair to them. They shouldn't have an arbitrary name forced upon them just because it the letter "Y" convenietly follows "X" in the alphabet. They're better than that... and btw Brittiny Spears, boy-bands, and other assorted pop culture icons that did not start at the grass root level do not count. You think Gen X is going to let the Tiffiany and New kids on the block, define us. No way. !!@#!@ that! So, henceforth I will refer to Generation "Y" as the Digital Generation or Generation D. For where most of the Gen X'ers witnessed the Digital world rise from the ashes of the Analogue world (anyone else remember life before cell phones and CD's or Vinyl records, 45's, Cassetts Tapes, Pagers, and if you're really middle of the road even 8 tracks), Generation D was born into it. So thanks for the insights Mira. And Generation D, welcome to the world. Sorry about the rise of worldwide fundamentalism, terrorism, bird flu, the continued depletion of ozone layer/enviroment, urban sprawl, David Hasselhoff, David Blame, The Mullet, Pop-country music, Crack, Reality T.V., and the return of war...but you're smart kids, we're sure you'll figure it out.

'ello all, As I was gearing up for my English Lit. Exam this evening, I ran across an interesting idea in my text's preface. It's one of those HUGE norton anthologies. Anyway, it said sometime like: A particular speech community can pronouce words "half" or "car" however it likes, but it can't unilaterally change the way the words are spelled. Indeed, this is one of the unappreciated advantages of the notoriously irregular English spellings system-it is so plainly unphonetic that there's no temptation to take it as codifying any particular spoken variety. When you want to define a written standard in a linquistic community that embraces no one standard accent, it's useful to have a spelling system that doesn't tip its hand. So in other words, English is cool in that the various english-speaking regions of the words can come up with their own individual dialects or way of pronoucing things, but for the most part we can still understand each other in the media of the written world. Okay yeah, big deal. Why am I bringing it up? Okay so presumably an individual english speaking-community can't unilaterally change the rules of spelling just because of their regions accent. Well what happens when you have a community that doesn't speak to each other at all. A community that communicates almost exclusively via the written word, say like the internet??? And with all the net-speak lingo that's already out there, I wonder if one day we will all end up creating an new internet-based standand of English... What are the over all implications of this? I have no idea. I just thought it sounded neat. rev...

On second look, I dismiss my notion of a third persona in the first stanza. And see it again as a mother daugther combo, but with the daughter this time being disappointed... disappointed in what? Now that would be the question. Hmm, maybe the main speaker is disappointed in her mom's pretence. Though, I'm not sure what that mask or "lie" consist of... Hmm, maybe they're at the father's funeral, and the mother feels not grief, but guilt over his death, or maybe she even had a hand in it Intriguing, yet preplexing... hmm. So dad's gone and passed away in the last stanza as well, and maybe the mother has died in a way herself. Oh she's still breathing, but the daughter is doing something to "urn" her. I do love abstration and obscurity. Maybe a little to much really, since I'm supposed to be writting more concrete in order to achieve more balance in my poems. i.e. so other people can understand them. But, I still ask the question, why do they need to understand them, and the answer I get is, "oh they don't, but if you are the only one that understands your poetry, then what you are really writing is journal...and there's nothing wrong with that."

I agree, very nice... but: "sib urns" meaning escapes me, as does the use of "urn" for in the next sentence. And I'd suggest the use of "commas" in you last stanza, "she knew, she knew, she knew..." inorder to mirror the first stanza's, "she knows she knows she knows" Also, it seems you have built a fairly complex metaphore encompassed by a "before and after" frame. The two outside frame stanza's seem to be taking place in the present, while the "at age..." stanzas seem a life time of reflections chronicling past disappoitments of some sort which the main speaker is using as a reference to judge or view the actions of the unvoiced other person in the first stanza. kind of like, a parent saying to a child, "you can't fool me, I've seen it all before." *** Another take, i have on this, is of a Mother in the first stanza sitting with her daughter. The mother is clearly disappointed and the daughther has an inkling of this. However, it is unclear to me, whether or not the person that is saying "I'm diappointed" is the mother, and if that is so, if the Mother is the main persona of the poem. This all ties back into the "sib" part, which make wonder if there is not a third persona in the First stanza. That of an Older of sister, and the older sister is watching her Mother punish her younger sister in the same fashion that she was once punished. Yet, the conclusion escapes me. It seems it hinges on the "sib urns" line. And since "sib" can mean "kin." And "urns," seem to be related to cremation, and since you using it as a verb here, I conclude it may me something like: The relative takes Daddy's ashes out of love, and Mom's just because... Which make me wonder, why there seems to be a stronger tie to the father. And it also reinforces for me, that a third personal voiced as a sister may exist. Whew... So, I see LOTS potenial in the poem. You may want to consider writing a few variation on your theme and see what fruit it brings. Also, the "at Age 7" stanza strikes me as an flawed metaphore, or only half of one. I can see how being a new kid could be like the Mayor's daughter stepping up prematurely. But I don't get how they would be seen as bargining chips or how the daughter of a Mayor could ever assume throne in the first place. But the throne itself could be intended as metaphorical to the position itself, as with the process of assumption. Even taking that into conderation, it still seems an awkard or incomplete metaphore. Though, I'm probably just missing something. Also, given the strong catholic school references in this poems, (Nuns, rulers etc..) I wonder if the "at age 9" stanza's necklace is refering to a cross, rosary beads, or some other religious icon. Other musings lead me to see premarital sex and an unexpected pregnacy may also be a huge theme in poem. Though the details are a little fuzzy. I draw this conclusion largely from Stanza's dealing with ages "17, 19, and 21." Oh and least I forget, "age 15" seems to almost foreshadow the next few, with the lines: hoping those patterns sensed behind Mommy and Daddy are nothing more than poltergeists left behind by someone else Which seems like your speakers, trying not to repeat the mistakes of that her parent made, but once again, that mistakes/patterns or even inherited traits are fuzzy too. Whew... So, I think you got a gold mine material here. cheers, rev...