Peredhil

Resist the call, Death's illusions cease All things pass, make the change Impotence is society's lie One person can make the difference Before they die. Acting out to meet needs within Demanding those needs be met Is another way to say depression my friend You can do better yet. If you can give without needing response If you can turn inner eye to look out The world's not such a bitter place after all The gift of life don't flout. Hugs There are those at the Pen, at least, who'd miss your voice if stilled forever.

Without missing a beat, the General bonks the fuzzy with his baton, and then they both face the audience and begin to sing. General Oh, I'm a most very modern General made for war Not to be confused with Officers from H.M.S. Pinafor It only in the peacetime that I have time which I abhor - For I'm a most very modern General as I said before. Purple Fuzzy - subtext translation accompanies music I'm a Purple Fuzzy one of many very mercenary Most consider us to be quite greedily contrary We're only limited in our desires by what we carry - Canid's delight - I'm a purple fuzzy (was he?) who's mercenary! The General stops, looks down at the fuzzy in distain. This is too silly for me. He walks off the stage. The fuzzy waves it's toothpick and begins doing a parody of the General with his baton... cut to:

Posts here are original to the Pen. Posts in the Library have appeared at another Site, or been published somewhere else. (email, school newpaper, Poetry.com, etc).

this is a good depictation of a type of addiction, the emotional/relational side. For every victim there will appear an abuser, and the only way to stop is to take self-control and responsibility. I think you brought that out, or at least, I see it when I read.

Strong Haikus you have Pain-filled, sensitivity I don't like that Beast!

When the trust dies And they believe lies Then the relationship is dead. Some may endure no longer pure As suspicions fill his head. Sometimes the sharp knife ending is better than the lingering...

Ouch. Hugs My family is a bit strange at funerals. After shedding tears at the graveside, and grieving our loss, we go back to a common room or banquet hall, and hold a celebration of the person's life. We share memories of the person gone, and keep them alive a bit longer in that way. We write down stories and memories of their life, and give it to any family survivors. things like that. The body may now be dead - but the important part we loved is no longer in there...

sometimes, I wish relationships came with a roadmap. Confused and clueless, longing for deep love and settling for shallow lust. I think these are pretty universal themes.

This is chilling. You could make an entire story out of this. The father taking care of the daughter, until one day he notices she's growing, changing - starting to look and act like her mother... Meep!

What a paean to Mentors every where! Funny, but Zool did the same sort of thing for me- when I thought I couldn't write any more, he prodded me back on the literary path. I like this.

I like this were-horse description. What is it about young women and their horses? Perhaps there is a lesson, in a small bridle of leather directing all the savagery and power...

The loss of any pet is difficult. We had three geckos, now there is only one, cowering near the heat lamp.

"Morale is to numbers as ten to one." When I read things like this, I keep seeing them as neat snippets which introduce chapters in a really good fantasy novel.

In the second line, perhaps "it's people that I find"? Did you mean scowl instead of "cowl" in the eight that said, This reminds me of the 1000 years in Revelations when the devil gets released to play...

And it's a good thing that eraser took a hike. Like the song says, "I'm so dizzy my head is spinning, Like a whirlpool it never ends" Love and hormones are a deadly combination to the intelligent and sensitive. keep breathing in and out!

Sleeping Beauty would be my guess Or at least the one I hazard The give away might've been the dress Or maybe the romantic waking love stuff.

Interesting ABBA structure, which also once upon a time had some really fun songs. Nice mythic quality to this.

If it were me, I'd judge it Assembly Room material. Which is a shame, 'cause this is really good, and that's our least read room.

Odd? I like it. But then, I'm prolly reading all sorts of things into it.

Interesting. I think I've been this tired... Personally, I'd consider changing 'unto' into 'to' in the second line. You write poems to which I relate, but I wish I didn't!

For some reason, I thought of a old computer monitor, or one of those old black-and-white television sets, warming up after being turned on. Which I'm sure has nothing to do with this, but there you are.

Laughs out loud What a great twist ending! I've had days where I wish I could say some of those things on the phone. but I just can't be that Rude.

Hmmm. Death? Isolation? Deafness? This reads on many levels and none. Speaking it aloud, some parts felt awkward - have you considered a rewrite?

You're welcome. I'm sorry I didn't come looking for this until now. I'd plead busy, but I should've made the time anyway. I still like it, and I think it captures the feeling of the lover fearing to leave. I think you might have meant "losing" you, but it works well in a clever way as it is - he doesn't want to let her loose, for fear so won't return. It must be difficult to feel so much, in passion's grip to burn.

There is a seed here, jagged and raw. But, like the doubled today in stanza three, this one just didn't sing to me. But then, my feedback isn't the law.