Peredhil

A bit of a ramble for archival purposes. Read at your own risk, for this is the person behind the Peredhil I am an exclusion thinker. I'm blessed with enough that I take what goes correctly for granted, and my focus is innately directed toward exclusions. what ever I accomplish, I zero in on the (however small) portion that I could have done better. I "If Only". If Only I'd worked harder. If Only I'd worked smarter. If Only I'd figured it out a bit sooner. If Only I had/hadn't said something. If Only. I fill my life with "If Only"s. If Only I'd walked with Jesus surely it would be easier to believe what is written instead of how I feel. If Only I weren't alone. If Only I could just retreat from the world, and all it's demands, and have time to think and study and figure things out. Even my If Onlys are contrary. The result of my exclusionary thinking is that I don't do things. I wait on circumstances to change. I find excuses not to take charge of my life. I blame things, circumstances, people. My exclusionary thinking focuses on contrast. "But". "But what if" and I look at myriad futures that may or may not happen and find reasons not to try. Exclusionary thinking on my part leads to failure, excuses for failure, and reasons not to try. The only solution I've found for my ability to sabotage and defeat myself is trust in God. After so long, it's pretty much experience on my part, I know without uncertainty that things will work out, I will be taken care of, etc. Such a simple thing. Still doesn't make it any easier to live, just gives me a choice. Focus on promises? Or my "If Only" or "But"s.

LOL. I'd forgotten many of these.

Wow! I like this. Gives the up and down feeling of reality's pulsing when medications fight sickness. Good alliteration, nice use of line breaks. You shouldn't be reluctant to post at all. Heh - go read the sticky "should I post" - and then post more!!!

yay! welcome back!

My friend broods and paces restlessly, mulling bits of information and examining them like the raven he is. There's not enough to make a whole, but he can't leave the shiny pieces of his life alone. Outside, the wind rustles through the dying leaves idly, playfully testing each one to determine if it is its destiny to fall yet. Even the green leaves sway as it teases with promises of their future. Occasionally a child's shout drifts in, exclaim joys of discovery, a snail or worm, the joy of kicking leaves or just running to become one with the wind, heart pounding life pumping happiness. The start of a diesel engine and the raven flies away.

consider "beyond words" hyperbole, and describe to the best of fragile communications to the non-touched the beauty of such a transcendent feeling. The incredible *knowing* of love, without doubt, without wondering if it is manipulation, without anything but to enlarge the heart to receive such a gift. Feeling the love seeking out and finding each hidden fear of being unworthy of such a feeling, and soothing it with acceptance.

A grim grin spares nary tooth unless great gain Gleefully grinning I glean grated grain Going against the grain I grin at pain Though its gyres and glaives wind me 'bout.

Happy Birthday!!!

1. [male pennite] Orlan 2. [female pennite] Wrenwind 3. [adjective] bold 4. [another female pennite] Ayshela 5. [adjective] royal blue 6. [item of clothing] corset 7. [adverb] dynamically 8. [almost dragonic product] Almost Dragonic Hair Remover™ (only 2 Geld if you order now!) 9. [adjective] bashful 10. [creature] jabberwocky 11. [adjective] orange 12. [body part] nostrils. 13. [yet another female pennite] Beautiful Nightmare 14. [sickness] cooties 15. [event] Annual Pen Fundraiser 16. [shape] round 17. [speed] approaching the speed of light 18. [feeling] gruntled 19. [body part] toe 20. [game] War on Terror: the boardgame

I love these. *laughs in delight* thank you for hosting another one, Wyvern.

yay! shiny stabbity fun!

I left the store today, The birds quoth "cheap, cheap, cheap". I left the house tonight, The birds were fast asleep.

A game! a game! The game is on, The couplets needn't, Be too long.

glad you posted this. particularly resonated to "Instead of having my head in the clouds, I wish all of me were there."

1) Name of Female Pennite - Tralla 2) An Object - oscillating beanie cap propeller 3) Verb, ending in “ing” - osculating 4) Adverb - stingily 5) Noun - paradigm 6) Adjective - stonking 7) A Number - .00031 Name of Male Pennite - Jechum 9) Adverb - transparently 10) Adjective - minuscule 11) Type of Laugh - maniacal 12) Adjective - baby blue 13) Adverb - wearily 14) Plural Noun - tails 15) Part of Body - eyes 16) Adverb - highly 17) A Color - puce 18) Verb, Past Tense - defenestrated 19) Plural Noun - men 20) Verb - fighting

would die laughing - but is too wise to do so around a Necromancer... Marvelous!

Well written

wow. this really speaks to me. good job.

ooooh. that captures so many wonderful movie memories. *hugs Politely* welcome BACK!

Peredhil wandering in absent-mindedly, eyes fixed on the floor looking for dropped change. He wears a blush, a bit of icing, and a very dazed expression from the stripper. Looking up and seeing Wyvern... Wyvern! How wonderful. Here's the $1.36 I've collected toward the Pen Board Fees. quick hugs If I could just remember where I hid that mountain of geld I had. the Polite one wanders back off scratching his head to aid memory, leaving Wyvern with a dazed expression at the mention of a mountain of geld. The long lolling tongue encountered icing and in a swirling motion, licked it. The reptilian eyes sharpened suddenly. "Peroxide-blonde, 38, 24, 36, pasties, white cake, one hug and an unclaimed paid-for dance!!!" Portrait forgotten, Wyvern hurried after Peredhil Peredhil! Stop! Where was your party! I'll do it for you!

Good stuff, and great muses indeed. Huh. just realized that where I am in SC, I'm 2 hours from Atlanta.

Heh. I'm retired from my first career. working on starting on my second. I think I had more hair than Jon W. when I was a wee laddie, knee-high to a short sheep.

A kid is the beginning portion of life. At 47, I'm still starting. When I grow up, I want to be young at heart.

http://www.myspace.com/feldar Mention the Pen if you want to add me as friend or I'll prolly delete you as spam...

Drops off a chain-saw, primed and ready to go, and a 'get-out-of-jail free' card...