The Portrait of Zool

good here. Surely, if they are coming back, you could tell who's they are?

Indeed, Happy happy B-day!

You forgot Gilligan's Island, F-troop, Car 54, Rat Patrol, Sea Hunter, I Love Lucy... Err... N/M.

"I'll drink to that!" toasts the portrait above the fireplace to the stunned silence. Lifting a painted mug in his painted hand, his painted lips find, much to the whole portrait's dismay, that Brute has already drank this booze as well. "Well..." begins Zool again, wondering distractedly how Brute managed to drain even a depiction of a tankard, "Give the young man some supper then - he has certainly earned it."

Wait a minute - didn't you say you hurt your thumb? Isn't the thumb only used for one thing - and you have two of them??? You oinker! Hehe - love your story!

English is an overwhelmingly male language. Point noted.

What Peredhil said. :/

(OOC: I have avoided this for years, and don't know if I got it right - but great thread Tzimm! ) Zool talks to cats as he passes them on the street. He gives a dogs a wide birth, even as they come bearing gifts in his dreams. Zool is of completely erratic and unpredictable nature, not so much from depth of opinion as breadth of choice, upon which he stands as if it were a windy mountaintop of wet ice, off of which he could slide in any direction at any instant. Zool has so completely alienated and pissed off his muse with his obnoxious and overbearing thinking that she imprisoned him in his own likeness, so that one day he may see how in his loud flatness he is his own worst enemy. Zool is a fool, but it is an artfully orchestrated foolery with a painstaking silliness etiquette, sometimes even coming together to make a point. Zool would never admit that though; to do so would be to admit to seriousness, in which case he 'knows' he would instantly keel over in green sizzling death. Zool is fearful of any kind of focus, even as he is attracted to ley line convergences. Zool is what old men who totter around in colorful ill-fitting clothes and laugh a lot were like when they were younger, if they survive. Zool is what young boys who wander around daydreaming all the time are like when they are almost grown up, if they survive.

Wonderful post Canid. I commend you. From m-w.com; Main Entry: in·no·cence Pronunciation: 'i-n&-s&n(t)s Function: noun Date: 14th century 1 a : freedom from guilt or sin through being unacquainted with evil Key here is the concept of evil. I personally believe that once one reaches the sophistication to redefine evil, then it becomes possible to reclaim innocence. For example, Christianity is famous for expousing that all is according to 'God's plan', then ducking responsibility for suffering by chucking it all up as the work of the devil. So, which is it? Either all is for good, or it is not. When one can commit to everything being 'for good', wether in faith or for any other reason, then it follows to forgive the universe. Of course, that is just an example - but the point then becomes innocence through experience. What you have experienced is disillusionment of the aparent idea that teachers, adults, and the entire education system in general actually know what they are doing. Heh. I actually think having a 'theme' and putting the functioning of the grown child in society as a goal is fine, but listening to the way they do it gives me the willies. Comprehension can be a very slippery thing. Most people think that if they can understand the words to something, then they feel comfortable in saying they understand the concept. This obviously does not automatically follow - but try telling them that. Listen to Nyyark - his is a very responsible and aware attitude. To some extent one must play the game, but if you let them they will readily consume your soul and spit you out at the end of your productive life. Simply becoming aware that you have to watch out for yourself, and can never take what society hands you at face value is half the battle. This does not necessarily make everything in society bad, but you have to think for yourself. Take what they teach you of value in school, as Nyyark says, and use it to serve YOU. As for wisdom and imagination, that is pure and utter nonsense. Imagination is one end of manifestation, the other end being the discipline and skill to make it real. This is how people innovate, invent, enlarge mankind's horizons, write books. Many people in the worldare very skilled and disciplined, but only encouraged to use their imagination to the extent it serves their employers aims. I suppose that's fine, if you are satisfied being a 9 to 5er for someone else the rest of your life... Imagination will atrophy with disuse, just like any capability. This is one way the world encourages us to expand. To have a dream - to be a writer, an astronaut, a movie star, whatever - we must then grow enough to not only maintain that vision, but also develop the discipline and the skill to make it real. Then we become a force in the world. An artist does not become an artist by painting pictures - many people do that. An artist becomes an Artist by capturing the intangible - by using his imagination to intuitively conceptualize a form with meaning, and then uses his skill and discipline to manifest his creation. That is true personal power - and knowledgable people can readily recognize the value of that, as well as sense it's complete lack. And so, it seems, can you.

I used to live on Hemlock. No, really... it was my street... Nice go on a gothic theme, as Rune pointed out. Another fine poison is Oleander leaves...

Oh yeah that feels gooooood!

"Pssst... Kender... Over here..." Tasslehoff turns his head to see Zool down on one knee, whispering and animatedly gesturing him over to his painting. "Err..." began the Kender. "Shhh!!" shooshed Zool, his eyes wide. After quickly looking both ways to make sure Deadly Nightshade had not heard, he once again gestured Tasslehoff should come over to his portrait. Quick to catch on, Tasslehoff tip toed over to the giant portrait over the fireplace. "Yes?" he whispered. "Just this," whispered Zool as he pushed 'Play', and blasted one of the loudest, coolest, most awesome songs Tasslehoff, or the Pen, had ever heard. The Kender jumped back as though struck by lightning at the chanted intro, but quickly started moving to the beat as the song took off... I've seen all good people turn their heads each day so satisfied I'm on my way. I've seen all good people turn their heads each day so satisfied I'm on my way. Take a straight and stronger course to the corner of your life. Make the white queen run so fast she hasn't got time to make you a wife. 'Cause it's time, it's time in time with your time and its news is captured For the queen to use. Move me on to any black square, Use me any time you want, Just remember that the goal Is for us all to capture all we want (Move me on to any black square) Yea, yea, yea. Don't surround yourself with yourself, Move on back two squares, Send an Instant Karma to me, Initial it with loving care Don't surround Yourself. 'Cause it's time, it's time in time with your time and its news is captured For the queen to use. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit didda. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit Didda. Don't surround yourself with yourself, Move on back two squares, Send an Instant Karma to me, Initial it with loving care Don't surround Yourself with yourself. Don't surround yourself. Send an Instant Karma to me. Don't surround yourself. 'Cause it's time, it's time in time with your time and its news is captured For the queen to use. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit didda. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit didda. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit didda. Diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit diddit didda. 'Cause it's time, it's time in time with your time and its news is captured... The pealling crescendo left everyone wide eyed - and then complete silence. One could hear a pin drop... Nightshade stormed around angrily. *I've Seen All Good People, by Yes*

Great intro to your story Judicator. You might call it 'Son of the King' or some such, to convey the central struggle of the story, which is to come out of that label and into Kingship in his own right. Or did you have a more complex theme in mind? I think you have done a lot right here. The main character is well handled, showing his private misgivings and insecurities with his realization that so much depends on his presenting the right image. He is well portrayed as a person caught between worlds, though he knows his responsibilities are clear. Vishn (great name!) is very intrigueing, of course, well set to be a central character to our protagaonists difficulties, one way or another. First person would not have been my first choice for this, but that is a matter of personal choice. I think for dramatisation third person often works better for the simple fact that SHOWING comes more readily to that structure, though I think you do a good job with it. Many questions, personal to Javo, are also the questions on the reader's mind, so POV is never violated. My only criticism is the old saw 'Show, don't tell'. Rather than saying 'The ceremony was nice' or 'Vishn isn't your ordinary person', you should simply SHOW it. There is enough descriptive detail to omit those observations and still engage the reader meaningfully. Again though, in first person, throwing in the some personal observations of Javo are fine, though used judgementally too often it can become a distraction. As the heir his thoughts will gravitate to grappling with the troubles in his new reign. Idle thoughts are less and less likely to pop up. As the action unfolds, he too will see what is shown, and act accordingly.

So stop that.

One day the details will interest you. One day you will practically be posessed by a story and unable to shut it out of your mind until it has been told. One day you will have two good thumbs, I think. ;p

Poem 6; Do you mean 'touch' instead of 'tough'? Oh my... http://www.themightypen.net/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.gif That wouldn't be B, would it?

Well, my dear Zadown, do keep regurgitating that 'vision'. It is rather pungent - in a good way.

If it takes a lot of room, we understand...

I imagined a hawk, though I never ruled out a cybird.

Fascinating story Aardvark, crammed with as much history and action as one could hope for in 1177 words. Very well written. And yet... It leaves so many questions unanswered. This is a wonderful synopsis of the action of a novel - not plot, because plot is what actually moves the action. Who is it that died? Why was he wanted dead? Who wanted him dead? Who was the chronoassassin (Oh! What a great series of novels that concept would make!)and how does he operate? How does he move in time? How was he able to hit his victim from such a temporal distance? The beginning of a story is always a promise - a promise to show, to explain, to satisfy our curiousity. We want the dirt! The more personal, the better. We want to feel as part of the story. Never pull emotional punches. Is this the scientist's story? The assassin's story? The guy who hired the assassin? An associate of the scientist, or someone else? As a real live novel this has so much potential!!

I enjoyed that Z. I've been thinking myself for some time how I might combine sci-fi with the occult. Certainly, fantasy and sci-fi have become nearly inseperable, but, as I think you have done here, I envision a genre that stands on it's own - sort of Edgar Allen Poe writes Stranger in a Strange Land... Ray Bradbury explored this, though his style and penchant for using historical figures lent itself more to the fantasy tale in the future. The physical universe grinds on, but the metaphysical is always just under the surface. It is unseen, but inevitably driving events. Are God and the Tao one? Are there places where the door is not so tightly bolted - one way or the other?

So here is an exercise in life architecture - suck up your own life, chew it up, and blow bubbles... It can be fun.

You got the wiggle Gwai... heh heh...

Yes, happy sweet sixteen!