Wyvern

Ephemeron Ephemeron walks up to the well-lit conservatory. "Must be a party!", he finds and walks up to the building with his massive flock of sheep. He greets Wyvern and after a brief conversation he finds out about the admission. "You mean I have to pay $10 for every sheep here?!?!" Ephemeron turns back towards his sheep. Where am I going to get that kind of money..., he thinks, gazing at the endless mass of white now in front of him... ------------------ Ephemeron Master Shepherd

Destructo Destructo arrives at the party. 10 dollars!?!?!?!?!?! thats absurd and starts to walk away. ------------------ "Destroyer of all good and evil"

Wyvern Wyvern sent out invitations to his party. They read: "All Archmages: come to Wyvern's enormous party! Be sure to bring your dates (especialy if they're babes) and have a blast! Food and alcohol for everybody! The party takes place in the Conservatory of the Great Council." and in the small print: "admisions fee:10$. couples:20$ (heh heh)" Wyvern proceded to get drunk as the thousands of guests began to arrive... ------------------ Wyvern ...almost a dragon.

In light of the recent "Quincuinox" party thread, I decided to look back over a couple of older party threads, and thought it might be nice to have some of them archived on these boards. The most successful of them, "Cerulean's Masquerade," has already been archived in this Library courteousy of Peredhil. Some of the old parties I remember well while others were forgotten until just recently, and there are some interesting trends that I've noticed in many of them. I'll be archiving these parties in chronological order, and will write a short commentary to introduce each of them. The first party thread archived here was egoistically entitled "Wyvern the Party Animal," and took place on the Archmage Universal Bulletin Boards from August 7, 2000 to October 20, 2000. Strangely, I remember the thread fairly well, despite it containing some of my very early and extremely immature roleplaying. What I don't remember, however, is that Arawn and Ozymandias contributed amongst others. It's not my best writing, so you'll have to forgive me for this one... ;-p

The orange leaves wave quietly as a light breeze passes over the Komikira gardens, the gnarled branches of the old keniji tree gently beaten by the light pulse of the Autumn wind. The movement slowly dies down, like the soft rhythm of a dying heart, as the leaves gradually rustle to a standstill. Withered and crippled, a mockery of their former Spring glory, they watch over the gardens; oblivious to friendship, oblivious to honor, oblivious to love. Oblivious to betrayal. Time halts in its course as a single leaf drops from the highest branch, its wretched distortion losing it a spot amongst its lofty brethren. The leaf dances gracefully to the wakazashi fields below, like some grotesque skeletal winddancer, a morbid puppet show of natures lost grandeur. Upon nearing the fields, it slides down the handle, then the hilt, of a katana blade that rests embedded there. It smoothly glides down the blade, sensually carressing it, savoring every moment, until it finally reaches the pool of blood that rests at its base. The leaf foats there, helplessly stranded. A meeting point for whispers and laughter. An impromptu dueling ground. And now, a tombstone. The old keniji tree of Komikira gardens.

Loki Wyrd sighs in relief as Ozymandias changes his "Honored Guest" name tag back to his original "Initiate" tag, adjusting the title below his name proudly and straightening his tunic. Bowing to the Loremaster, Loki Wyrd whistles to himself happily and briskly walks towards the exit of Cabaret Room, not noticing a scaly claw as it reaches for him from a dark corner of the room... Grabbing Loki Wyrd by the collar of his tunic and yanking him towards his hiding place, Wyvern places a scaly finger up to the Initiate's lips to silence him and hisses in a low voice: "Let me guess... you were given the 'unaccounted-for-until-recently' explanation, right?" Loki Wyrd stares at Wyvern in a half-confusion/half-anxiety, then slowly nods his head. "Well..." hisses Wyvern while taking out several portfolios labeled 'Initiate Files,' as well as a tome labeled "The Life, Times, Psychology and Emotions of Initiate Titles." "It seems you may have been shorthanded in terms of explanations. Allow me to explain what really happened to your Initiate title in your absence, Mr. Wyrd." Loki Wyrd frowns and fiddles with the tag under his name nervously, glancing towards potential escape routes to the exit of the Cabaret Room as Wyvern continues. "From the minute I layed my eyes on Initiate Title #218 (that's your title) I knew she was gonna be trouble. She was too perceptive, always leaning a little to close to the Page titles, always a little too observant of her own race. It wasn't until you left the guild that Initiate Title #218 took the time to study, and discovered the fate of Initiate Titles when a member reaches Page, that being their complete removal from existance. She formed a resistance known as the 'Initia Militia' that waged a war on Page Titles... a war that escalated to a war against all other titles, their presence all insinuating doom upon her and her race. Her campaign was surprisingly successful, but was thwarted upon your reappearence at the Pen." Wyvern places a scaly claw on Loki Wyrd's shoulder as the Initiate gives him a blank stare. "For this, I must thank you Loki Wyrd... in recapturing Initiate Title #218, you may very well have saved the existance of all honorable titles." Wyvern pauses for a moment, his face suddenly darkening. "But remember to be wary of your Initiate Title... she may be plotting against you at any given moment!" With that, Wyvern lets Loki Wyrd go. The holder of Initiate Title #218 stumbles the rest of his way to the exit of the Cabaret Room, now even more befuddled than when he had first arrived. ;-)

I saw two films on DVD recently: "Mystic River" and "The Cooler." "Mystic River" was an excellent movie that probably ranks amongst the best films of 2003 in my book, and I highly recommend checking it out. The film was put together very realistically and has superb acting throughout it, including exceptional performances from Sean Penn and Kevin Bacon. The mystery of the film is intriguing, the drama is riveting, and the entire thing maintains a certain level of realism throughout it. Highly recommended. "The Cooler," on the other hand, was an average Hollywood Casino/Gambling/Romance story that never really grabbed my attention, despite a great performance from Alec Baldwin as the head of the casino. The film bled cliches and dealt with themes very bluntly... it's mostly skippable.

Lumpen, I stayed up this evening in the hopes of catching your show, but the computer I'm currently using unfortunately cannot access secure connections, which caused the audio stream not to work for me (things like accessing Hotmail and Paypal don't work on it either). I struggled trying to get the stream to play on the computer, but after many unsuccessful attempts I gave up... I promise that I'll tune into your show as soon as I either get this computer accessing secure connections again, or get back to my old computer at the beginning of next semester. Congratulations on being broadcast online, I definitely look forward to hearing you D.J!

I just read through "Sleuth" and thought that it was a very well done story, Zadown. As always, the characterization of the Dreamer was excellent throughout it, as his proud yet immoral personality and his sarcastic tone always make for a great read. He comes off as a fully three-dimensional character in this story through the conflicting aspects of his personality, such as his lack of emotions in combat when contrasted with the single tear he sheds at Sherishen's death. I also agree with Yui that your descriptions of worlds were very vivid and creative in the story, particularly that of the world of Khârzalar. It was very interesting to witness the Dreamer devoid of his magical powers on the plane of Merlimar, as it seemed to almost humble him to an near-human position. The ending was a great surprise as well, and Valdar's cameo appearence was cool. He seemed to add a bit of comic relief to the mix with his "shiny" references... In terms of potential improvements, the only thing I can think of is that a bit more backstory might be nice... though I'm certain that if I read all of the Dreamer's ventures from start to finish, I'd be 100% knowledgable on all of the characters involved in this piece. Great stuff, ye mighty planeswalker. ;-)

Yesterday night, I went to see Dangermouse & Jemini, Dopestyle 1231, Busdriver, Radioinactive & AntiMC, and Thavius Beck in concert at The Independent in San Francisco. I arrived at the concert hall early, and got to chat with a couple of the artists outside since they were just hanging out there and talking. Busdriver, Thavius Beck, Radioinactive and AntiMC all struck me as some really down-to-earth and friendly individuals, and it was awesome to just trade jokes and thoughts on music with them for a while. Radioinactive has a great sense of humor, and Busdriver is shockingly soft-spoken when talking normally, especially considering his extremely energetic and chaotic recorded material. I later met up with two good friends of mine, Misha and Elizabeth, and we went out to a nearby etheopian restaurant for dinner before waiting outside the club for the doors to open. We also directed Busdriver and co. to some nearby restaurants we had heard of. Shortly before entering the concert hall, we learned that Dangermouse and Jemini would have to perform first due to Jemini's needing to catch a plane early to take care of some urgent matters. Dangermouse said he would stick around to perform a solo set for the final act, however, so that the late crowd showing up for Dangermouse wouldn't be disappointed. Anyway, though there was only a tiny crowd at that point, Dangermouse and Jemini put on a very good set. Jemini put on a live show, which was amplified by his huge hypeman Fort Knoxx. After Dangermouse and Jemini finished their set, Thavius Beck took the stage to perform a short solo set of live electronica. His set was fairly good, though his music doesn't seem to be very oriented towards a live concert hall setting. Never the less, he mixed some very melodic and interesting melodies, and I recommend his material. Once Thavius Beck had finished, Radioinactive and AntiMC immediately took the stage to perform their set. They both put on a good show, with AntiMC working keyboards and drum machines while Radioinactive performed some impressive rhyme schemes and flows. Radioinactive's voice is an acquired taste, and is not my favorite, but his set was never the less well done, and I picked up a new release from him in concert which is great. After Radioinactive & AntiMC left the stage, Busdriver got up to perform, and promptly stole the show for "act of the evening." I had been anticipating Busdriver's performance the most out of all the performers, and was not disappointed. He has an extremely unique voice and flow, and a huge amount of stage presence and charisma live. He even performed a song I requested, "Imaginary Places." and gave Elizabeth a free T-shirt. Both of my friends went and bought his album after his set. After Busdriver left the stage, there was an intermission between acts in which the club got much more crowded, with many late-comers arriving to see Dangermouse's set. Before Dangermouse went on, however, there was another act that my friends and I had never heard of, Dopestyle 1231. To put it bluntly, he was absolutely aweful, and possibly one of the worst live acts I've ever seen. His set was based around a series of attention gimmicks with a little rapping thrown inbetween, and that rapping was not very good. Low points of his set include a children's story that he read straight from the book for literally ten minutes, and a song in which he wanted the crowd to shout the lyrics every other line. His terrible set reached its rock bottom at the end, when he decided to strip off his pants and his boxer shorts in the hopes of getting peoples attention with some full frontal male nudity. He failed, and his pathetic nudity attention-getter was completely out of place in a hip hop concert. Finally, once Dopestyle had finished his set, Dangermouse took the stage to perform a solo mix set. It was very impressive, and included some very innovative mixes such as a remix of Nas' "It ain't Hard to Tell" to the beat of Portishead's "Roads." He also formed several beats on the spot, which were all very well done. The real surprise of his set, however, was when Boots Riley, an M.C from the critically-acclaimed hip hop group The Coup, showed up as a surprise special guest and performed while Dangermouse spinned behind the boards. Boots put on a good set, which was highlighted by a remix of a classic Coup song to the beat of Soul's of Mischief's "93' Till Infinity" (possibly one of the greatest hip hop beats of all time) which they did as an encore. Overall, it was an evening full of surprises that was well worth the admissions fee, despite Dopestyle 1231's terrible set.

Ozymandias beams proudly as Katzaniel enters the beautiful palace of Luxor, smiling happily as her eyes widen at its beautiful decor and massive chambers. "Oh Ozy..." says Katzaniel in a half-whisper, turning her eyes towards him affectionately from the central entrance hall. "It's absolutely gorgeous." Katzaniel's affectionate response is suddenly interrupted as an ankh telephone resting at the corner of the hall rings loudly and shatters the sentimental moment. Katzaniel sighs and races to pick up the phone while Ozymandias continues to serve raspberries to the runner-up suitors outdoors. Picking up the telephone and holding it to her ear, Katzaniel says: "Hello?" There is a short moment of silence at the other end of the line. Then, a low almost dragonic voice speaks up. "You saw the video..." hisses the voice softly. "You have five days... then, you're mine." Katzaniel goes pale as evil laughter begins ringing from the phone, echoing throughout the halls of Luxor. Outdoors, Ozymandias suddenly notices that the other suitors are coughing in rasps upon eating the berries, and that Wyvern is nowhere to be found. "Dear Lord..." mutters Ozymandias, suddenly noticing that he's giving out Almost Dragonic Brand Raspberries. "What have I done?!" ;-) OOC: you didn't think it was going to be that easy, did you Ozy...? *cue roaring evil laughter*

Wyvern tosses a paper airplane made out of an old tax form into the Cabaret Room. The plane circles in the air a few times, and performs a maneuver in the shape of a dollar sign before quietly landing in the palm of Ayshela's hand. Unfolding the plane, Ayshela finds the following note: 1. Noun: nation-wide tax fraud 2. Verb (past tense): cheerfully slaughtered 3. Plural Noun: Fans of Nekkid Mages 4. Verb (past tense): sexily massaged 5. Noun: demi-god endorsed suntan lotion 6. Adverb: joatily 7. Verb (past tense): imitated 8. Noun: ancient angelic prophet 9. Verb (past tense): bodysnatched 10. Unit of Time: 0.000000001 nanoseconds 11. Verb: gently fan 12. Verb: bury alive 13. Noun: ancient angelic profit

Wyvern frowns and nods. I couldn't log onto Galaxynet this evening and thought it might have something to do with the computer I'm using, but now see that it must be universal... does anyone know if this Galaxynet downtime is a temporary thing, or should we seriously start looking into new IRC servers to host #thepen channel? Note: while waiting for IRC to come back up, I recommend posting creative writing on the boards, and participating in collective roleplaying threads such as "The Quincuinox." ;-) *End roleplaying add plug-in* Wyv- Jittering due to chat-deprivation.

Wyvern rubs his scaly palms together in greedy anticipation, seeing profit in the member-bending X-treme version of tic tac toe developed by Zadown and Valdar. Turning to Annael, Appy, and Vlad, the overgrown lizard clears his throat a few ashes and exclaims: "Now now ladies and gents... I realize that long drawn out X-treme versions of common mild-mannered games may seem intimidating at first, but just wait until you see the variety of exotic games Almost Dragonic Inc. has in store for the Pen: X-Treme Rock, Paper, Scissors. Zadown and his army stands at ready, brandishing slingshots and commanding large catapults filled with flaming rocks and stone golems. Elsewhere, Valdar sharpens his army of scissor-weilding fanatics, which includes a certain X-treme Sabre. Alienated from the two conflicting sides is Wyvern, who happily counts his piles of green paper... X-Treme Tongue Twisters. Lumpenproletariat and T)emon13laT)e wage a war of rhymes on top of a tongue shaped platform, twisting complicated rhyme schemes at dangerously high speeds, the slightest error potentially resulting in a corkscrew-shaped tongue for the rest of their lives. X-Treme Dominos. DoctorEvil and Dr. Tzimfemmstein race to see who can conceal the most members in large slabs of brightly spotted onyx, their principal objective to create a chain reaction of falling member slabs that will eventually land on Aardvark's left toe. And finally, last but not least, the most dangerous X-Treme sport of them all: X-Treme Joating. Thousands of Joat armor clad Joat-influenced members command large Joat-mechanized suites of Joat body armor. They then fire millions of volleys of Joat-missiles and signal to marine Joats to fire underwater, eventually charging at one another with Joat-cutlasses and aiming at each others Joats.

Katzaniel raises a brow curiously as she notices a small package sitting in her fan-mailbox. Reaching for the tattered package and brushing a hand over the front of it to remove the dust that has gathered on the cardboard, she carefully opens it only to find a video cassette tape. Attached to the tape is a nearly illegible note that reads: "To my dear, sweet, puuurrrrfect Katzaniel; enjoy this visual documentary of my amorous desires for you. Hiss hiss, XXL, Wyvie." Frowning slightly at the note and hesitantly picking up the video, Katzaniel turns on her television set, inserts the cassette into her VCR, and rubs her forehead as she braces herself for the worst. There is a moment of static on the screen, and then a mimic MGM studios arch made out of used cardboard boxes from previous Wyvern schemes appears. In place of the lion that regularly roars under the MGM arch is Cambronne, who lets out a timid "meow" before flopping over on her back at the scent of catnip. There's then another moment of static, in which cursing is heard faintly in the background, before the video displays a sign loosely filling the screen that reads: "Almost Dragonic Video Productions proudly presents..." The sign is then clumsily tossed to the ground and replaced with another sign, which reads: "Why Katzaniel should devote her affections to Wyvern." "Dear God..." mutters Katzaniel to herself, her eyes growing wider as the video continues. "Please, let this be short and painless." Katzaniel's contemplations are cut off as the video cuts to a scene where Wyvern sits in a beautifully furnished room, perfectly designed for love making, dressed in a fine fur coat and loosely gnawing on an unlit pipe. Turning to the camera and winking, the overgrown lizard hisses: "Fur and scales go quite well together, don't you think?" Katzaniel frowns and cringes at how poorly the fur coat clashes with Wyvern's scales. "Your fur and my scales were meant to be together, don't you see Katzaniel? Choose me, and we can cuddle next to the fire on this beautiful lion skin rug..." Wyvern's face suddenly goes blank and he stares at the camera in silence as he's struck with a sudden realization. "Errr... hehehe... that is, WOLF-skin rug. No cats were harmed in the making of this room, of course. Can you resist such class and elegence? Why, I'm certain that the other suitors would take you no further than Celes Crusador's Cafe!" Katzaniel scratches her chin thoughtfully... while Wyvern's attire didn't look attractive on him, she had to admit that the room had class. "Hey!" cries the familiar voice of Orlan from the background of the tape, causing Wyvern to turn in shock. "Why's the door- what the, WYVERN?! What are you doing in my room with my clot-" The scene cuts off as the screen turns to static, leaving Katzaniel a moment to sigh and dismally shake her head. She turns her eyes back to the screen as the tape cues up with another scene, this one in front of a Hollywood theatre. Wyvern tips the top hat he's wearing to the camera, adjusting his cheaply rented tux and hissing: "Now that the element of physical attraction is taken care of and you've fallen witlessly in love with my handsome appearence, it's time for me to elaborate upon my intellectual capabilities." "Oh geeze..." moans Katzaniel while rolling her eyes. "Looks like it just got worse." "Choose me as your suitor, and not only will we shamelessly rip off Alaeha's play idea, we'll also turn it into one gigantic advertisement for Almost Dragonic Brand Katzaniel-Sponsored Kitty Litter™! You can also rest assured that I'm very skilled in mathematic equations... for example, I know tax periods plus unfinished full-scale schemes equals loads of debt." The video once again turns to static, only to cut to another scene. In this one, Wyvern is dressed in his casual tunic and breeches, and is standing in the middle of an art gallery. "Another reason that you should choose me is for my machismo. Contrary to what some might say, I'm particularly strong and will protect you at the slightest hint of danger. I'm definitely stronger than the other suitors, and would like to elaborate my claims with a short demonstration involving one of Zool's friends." Wyvern begins pacing down the hall of the art gallery, then stops next to a painting of a body builder staring outwards. Turning towards the painting and narrowing his eyes, the overgrown lizard hisses: "What are you staring at, buddy? Just because you have those muscles doesn't mean I won't duke it out for Katzaniel!" With that, Wyvern rips the painting from the wall and tosses it onto the ground, jumping on it several times and setting it on fire with a match. The scene cuts off into static just as several art gallery security guards arrive and start beating Wyvern down with night clubs. Katzaniel scowls as a final scene cues up on the tape, this one showing Wyvern with a plain white background. "Now that you know the real deal, I encourage you to choose me as your suitor of choice. That's right Katz baby, Wyvern - the only real suitor for a one night sta- errr... committed relationship!" With that, Wyvern walks off from the area of the camera, revealing a small phrase on the white backdrop behind him that reads: "Will also be glad to cheat on Ramses with you... or cheat on anyone else, for that matter." Katzaniel lets out a low growl and turns off the T.V. ;-)

Wyvern stutters as he nervously eyes the circle of aggravated trolls now surrounding him, cursing at his inability to whistle at Ayshela's atypically provocative bodysuite attire given his current situation. "We's not get PAID enough for dis, Wyvern!" growls a troll with a large bone protruding from his nose and several eyelid piercings. "All trolls know: two cow meal plus two geldy piece is about fah-... uuuurrrr... two doz-... urgh, not enough pay!" "Ugh iz right." grumbles the leather-jacket sporting troll bouncer that had previously halted Celes Crusader and Knight amongst others. "Me works hard, has five trolls, one half-giant, and fourty eight mammoth to feed at home. Wants more pay!" Wyvern rubs his scaly forehead as the leather-jacket troll bouncer attempts to demonstrate his point by counting on his fingers, only to stop in confusion upon extending four of them. The overgrown lizard's headache and painful Prince-groupie-trampled joints are suddenly accompanied by a feeling of endangered pride as he notices a cute Princess curiously eyeing his situation from Buffet Table #12. Clearing his throat of a few ashes, the lizard hisses: "Now now fellas, you know I-" "Furgurmurgur go BOOM in flames!" interrupts a troll with a tattoo of a pig on his forehead and a total of three teeth. "Grock see it with his own eyes... dragon come and make Furgurmurgur toast. Dangerous job, more pay!" "Oh that..." mutters Wyvern in an irritated manner. "Well, that bouncer who got incinerated-" "Furgurmurgur." interjects the troll. "Yesssss." hisses Wyvern from between clenched teeth. "Furgurmurgur. Your friend's being burnt was not actually an accident. You see, uuuuhhhh... he had food poisoning and decided he wanted to be incinerated for his burial, that's all..." The trolls stare at Wyvern in silence, caught in confusion somewhere between the logic of Wyvern's argument and the meaning of the word "incinerate." "Look, I'll tell ya what..." continues Wyvern. "Since you all asked me so politely and formed this fine little circle around me, I'll give each of you a free ride on the Gwerry-Go-Round as extra pay." "Me no like pretty little plant." exclaims Ugh. "Gwerry-Go-Round for sissies!" "Yeahrrr!" exclaims another troll. "Wyvern a sissy!" Wyvern clenches his scaly fists up upon hearing this accusation, casting a quick glance to the Princess of Buffet Table #12 before retorting. "Now listen, I may be a lot of things, but I'm not a siss-" At that moment, Annael's butterflies arrive at their destination, and greet Wyvern by landing on his snout and flying in beautiful patterns around his scaly form. The overgrown lizard's face goes blank as the trolls are overcome with accusational grins upon witnessing the spectacle. "Wyvern a sissy!" shouts a troll, pointing at Wyvern and the butterflies. "Get'im!" Wyvern stutters as he's lifted from his feet by two troll bouncers, and goes pale as one grabs him by the tail and uses it to hold him high in the air. The trolls walk over to Buffet Table #12 and stop at the mutant pirahna platter, directly in front of the draconian Princess slurping there, and hold Wyvern directly above the platter menacingly. "Give pay, or you sleep with dah fishes!" ---- Elsewhere, at the guard outpost of the Conservatory's entrance... "So you see..." mutters Jim the security guard to Gnarlitch while sipping on an ale and staring at the stars. "Naturally, I'm the one who takes the security shift for the door when Melba is out examining carrot statues and looking up recipes or whatever it is she does. I mean, who else can the Conservatory rely upon? Heck, even those dumb troll bouncers seem to be strangely absent at this hour." "Mmmhmm." mutters Gnarlitch in response, only half-listening as he continues his vain search for any leftover frogs outdoors, his hands still tightly clutching his axe. Behind Jim, Stick races towards the chocolate mud wrestling arena in a frenzy, cleary set on stealing the chocolate one pocket at a time if necessary. "Sometimes, I don't think people appreciate my skills as a security guard..." continues Jim, taking a long sip of his ale as he fails to notice Rydia headed in a collision course with the Gwerry-Go-Round as she races towards the bathroom. "I mean, I can monitor both outdoors and indoors perfectly fine by myself, I always see to it that everything runs smoothly." "Yup." mumbles Gnarlitch as he sets himself on all fours and searchs under peoples legs for any frogs. Behind Gnarlitch, onWEED the stoned-golem, a remnant of Xradion's fantasy, hobbles in through the front entrance without paying a fee, proudly showing off its illegal and potentially dangerous components as it does so. "The stars certainly do look bright this evening, don't they?" mutters Jim, raising a brow as he notices that a small sliver of the moon is lit in a slighty dimmer hue then usual and ignoring Kaitlyn's cries as she cuts herself on Xaious' knives. "Makes an expert security guard like myself wonder... that equinox thing should be quite a spectacle. Not too far off either is it?" "Yah..." grumbles Gnarlitch, successfully completing a dirt sculpture of a frog and whacking it with his axe. "Hopefully, it'll attract some more frogs or something."

Wyvern takes a long moment to gape in awe at the Pens artistic talents, his eyes widening as they wander from one picture to the next. I love the coloring of the Gyrfalcon picture, the beautiful dress of the Salinye picture, and the golden glint in the eyes of the Chibi-Wyvern picture amongst other notable details. I think that each one of these pictures is excellent, and would like to applaud both Yui and Alzorath for their awesome work. Also, I'm honored that you chose to do a pic of Wyvern, Alzorath. Thank you, that Chibi-Wyvern seems to simply ooze mischief! ;-) Once again, great stuff!

Enitharmon sighs dismally and rocks back and forth in her applicant easychair, glancing at a nearby grandfather clock and wondering what could be taking the Elder of Initiates such a long time to arrive. Her arrival in the Recruiter's Office now seemed like a distant memory, though unlike the fond memories of her Pops and his Honda, these recollections were filled with gathering dust, sticky cobwebs, and overwhelming boredome. Memories perhaps best left forgotten in some remote, secluded corner of the brain... dull, dull, dull, dull, dull, dull, monotonous memories. Enitharmon suddenly perks up as the front door of the Office creaks open in an eerily calm manner and Wyvern staggers into the Office. She raises a brow as she notices that the overgrown lizards tunic and breeches are tattered and filthy, and that the Elder's eyes speak volumes of confusion. In one scaly claw the overgrown lizard carries a slightly chipped tecquilla glass with a purple umbrella sticking out of it, in the other hand he carries a slowly suffocating octopus. "Mr. Wyvern...?" manages Enitharmon meekly as she cautiously observes Wyvern's appearence, taking two steps back as the lizard hobbles forward and drops the octopus he's carrying. The applicant cringes as Wyvern lunges forward, placing a wet claw on her shoulder and quietly hissing: "Excuse me, would you happen to know the way to the nearest farm by any chance? See, I'm trying to get back to this Pen place that's listed on my business card, but for some reason I can't remember if it was a chicken pen or a pig pen..." Enitharmons jaw drops open as she silently stares at the reptilian Elder, her eyes following his hobbling form as he takes her speechlessness as a "no" response and wanders towards his desk. The confused lizard comes to a halt when he reaches the cluttered desk, and slowly raises a claw to his scaly chin. "Sssssay, this desktop looks vaguely familiar... and so does that octopus lying on the floor over there!" "Actually" interrupts Enitharmon in the hopes of helping Wyvern out "That's the octopus that you were just carrying, and that desk is supposed to be yours." With that, Enitharmon picks up her application from Wyvern's desktop and hands it to the lizard. "Here, read this over... it details my own memory, but there's a small chance that it could trigger something in yours." Wyvern sniffles to himself and snatches the application, reading it over out of curiousity. The lizard doesn't get far, however, as he stops mid-way through the first sentence and suddenly jumps as his full memory returns to him in a flash. "The seasons of my childhood were precious, golden things..." the lizard reads in an amazed manner. "Of course! I'm Wyvern, and this is the Pen!" Having said this, Wyvern happily stamps Enitharmons application ACCEPTED, then rapidly dashes towards the applicant in the hopes of using this moment of revelation as an excuse to tightly hug her. Fortunatly for Enitharmon, the lizard quickly proceeds to slip on the octopus laying on the floor and goes sailing out of the Office door... and directly into Melba's Anti-Wyvern Mallet. Home sweet home... ;-) OOC: On a more serious note; a nicely written application piece, Enitharmon. I particularly liked the numerous original details you used to bring the story to life, as well as the realistic subject matter. Certainly ACCEPTED, welcome to the Mighty Pen! My apologies for the long wait in my response... I look forward to reading more of your writing as well as participating with you in group projects. Once again, welcome!

I managed to see "Kill Bill Vol. 2" in the theatres with a good friend of mine the other day. This movie marks the first time that I've been genuinely excited to see a film in the theatres in a long time, since I was a huge fan of the first volume and have loved all of Tarantino's other works. "Kill Bill Volume 2" was excellent, as I expected, though it was radically different from the first volume of "Kill Bill." I felt that whereas the first volume of the series placed an emphasis on making a comically surreal action flick, the second volume seemed to take things that would normally be considered comic and make them serious. I never thought that something like "the five finger exploding heart technique" could be dealt with in such an elegant and powerful manner... In terms of other films, I also recently saw "The Last Samurai" and "Something's Gotta Give" on DVD, which I'd tag "average Hollywood film with oriental flavoring" and "slightly above average Hollywood comedy (thanks to Jack Nicholson)" respectively. Having said this, Wyvern quickly hammers up a sign that reads "Be Back Saturday," whines about one of the few disadvantages of meeting with friends over the Summer, and rushes off to socialize...

Lord_nor sighs and fidgets in his applicant easychair, toying with a large calculator in order to pass the time while waiting for the Elder of Initiates' arrival. The eager applicant rolls his eyes as he solves the Fuurier Series yet again on his powerful contraption, yawning and leaning back in his comfortable easychair. Proving algebraic formulas was always fun, but the anxiety evoked by Wyvern's extensive absence from the Office was causing him to be off by a couple of decimal places in his responses. Besides, the thought of entering the Pen and adding one to every Pen variable involving members was tempting enough to break his otherwise disciplined concentration... The slamming of the Office door suddenly breaks lord_nor's concentration as Wyvern speedily dashes into the room, immediately running towards the Recruiter's desk and crash landing into his favorite seat. The overgrown lizard begins rapidly shifting through the enormous amount of paperwork there, searching for lord_nor's application in the mess. "Mr. Wyvern, I presume?" mumbles lord_nor glumly, staring at his watch. "You are currently fourty eight hours, twenty seven minutes, and thirteen seconds late in responding to my application... fourty eight hours, twenty seven minutes, and fourteen seconds late... fourty eight hours, twenty seven minutes, and fifteen seconds late... fourt-" "I get the picture!" exclaims Wyvern, practically tearing the scales out of his head in frustration as he finally manages to find lord_nor's application amidst the piles of paper. "My apologies for being late, lord_nor. I'll be responding to your application shortly." Lord_nor smiles and nods as Wyvern immediately begins reading over his application, jotting various notes over the writing in a sloppy almost dragonic scrawl as he goes along. After he's finished, the reptilian Elder turns his scaly snout towards nor and hisses: "Hmmm... so you're the almighty Saint Lord of Mathematics eh? Would you happen to be a disciple of Pythogorus, Descartes, Einstein, or BelZspock?" Lord_nor stares at Wyvern blankly in a silence that can only suggest a negative response, to which the overgrown lizard hisses: "Ah well... hey, truth be told, I might be able to use an Almost Dragonic accountant to go through all these tax return papers around here, and you seem pretty good at math. Then again, the whole theme of wealth not equating to happiness found in your application story goes against one of my most basic principles in life." Noticing that lord_nor is paling at thought of going through Wyvern's paperwork, the greedy Elder sighs softly and stamps his application ACCEPTED. ;-) OOC: An ACCEPTED application story, lord_nor. Welcome to the Mighty Pen! I look forward to reading more of your writing, as well as participating with you in group projects. Sorry for the small delay in getting to your application response, and welcome once again!

"Well, old buddy old pal, I've got this party game I've been playing. The game's called 'Extort Money from Old Friends to Pay for Wyvern's Extraordinary Party Expenses,' and I'd love if you'd participate, old buddy/friend/associate/nemesis!" Knight frowns and quickly turns away from Wyvern upon hearing this, only to be met by the same leather-jacket sporting troll bouncer that had previously confronted Celes Crusador and Cambronne. "'Scuse me sir..." the troll growls, holding up a pair of plain boxer shorts. "Dese wouldn't happen to be your boxers, would dey?" Knight frowns again, deeper this time, and slowly nods. "Why yes, they are... is there a problem?" The troll spits a small imp he had been nibbling on to the ground and searches through his jacket for a moment. He then pulls out an extremely crumpled invitation sheet, which he quickly unfolds. Pointing at the area labeled "entry fee" on the parchment, the troll growls: "Says here it's gotta be an original form of underwear, not da generic variety. I'm afraid yer gonna have to cough up some original undies, otherwise it's the boot for ya." Knight frowns yet again, even deeper this time, as the troll gives a thumbs up to Valdar's entry fee, labeling it "indiscernable piece of cloth undies." He continues to frown as he notices Wyvern wandering off towards the buffet tables, hissing something about searching for mutated tomatoes to toss at Prince under his breath. "Oh, and annuder thing." grumbles the troll, pointing a muscular thumb outdoors. "If that's yer heap o junk of a 500,000 ton Tacnull spacecraft sitting outdoors, it's in a 'No-Parking Zone.' You'll have to move it three feet to the left fer it to be legal." Knight's frown deepens yet again, his scowl slowly ressembling that of a gargoyle... "B-but, it isn't even a functioning vehicle anymore!" ---- Meanwhile, at a familiar ancient observatory located several miles East of the Pen, on top of a hill that ressembles a gigantic stone version of Zool's toupee... "Coordinates! Coordinates!" screams Verteniun frantically, his eyes still gaping wide from the flaming comet he had just witnessed. "Cord of Nates, Core dynamite, Coor's Light... damn it, I can't find any coordinates here!" yells Daliarus, practically pulling his hair out as he shoves the "Astronomers Digest - Alien Swimsuit Issue" he had been glacing through to the side and rapidly searching through a pile of papers. "They're not just lying around! We were supposed to be recording them, stupid! Great, just great. That's the last time you convince me that watching an episode of that banned show "Melba-Rose Place" is more important than star-gazing. Whatever we missed, it sure looked important!" "By the stars..." mutters Daliarus, slowly paling as he continues to desperatly search through papers in the hopes of miraculously finding pre-written coordinates for the comet. "What are we going to do, Vert? What are we going to do?! Master Calzoo will have our HIDES for missing such an event!" "N-now, calm down Dal. There must be some solution to this situation. We just have to think it through." "W-w-w-we actually have to think?!" sobs Daliarus "This is not what I had in mind when I took the position of assistant astronomer. *sob*" "Shut up Dali!" growls Verteniun loudly. "Just give me a second to think this through or we'll both be permanently seeing stars when Master Calzoo gets here." A long moment of silence passes in which Verteniun thinks and Daliarus laments over the process of thinking. Then the former perks up and quickly reaches for a backpack sitting next to his chair, rapidly filling it with leftover junkfood and drinks. "Vert..." mutters Daliarus, staring at his associate glumly. "You know that running away is for sissies, right?" "We're not running away." counters Verteniun, tightening the straps of the backpack on his shoulders. "We're tracking down the comet manually. Come on..."

HappyBuddha sighs to himself and fidgets in his "Extra-Endurance Adamantium Applicant Easy Hammock," bending it slightly and causing small tremors to wave through the floor of the room. Tanuchan and MeThinksUFoolish cling to several messy file cabinets as HappyBuddha taps his foot impatiently on the ground, causing the room to shake with each contact and leaving large foot-shaped impact craters in the foots wake. Mumbling curses under his breath and keeping a close eye on the Office door, the enormous buddha raises his chin(s) as the front entrance to the Office slowly creaks open. "Wyvern!" exclaims HappyBuddha, causing the entire room to quake as he lifts himself from his seat. "Finally, what took you so-" The eager applicant comes to a sudden stop as he notices that the figure entering the Office is not, in fact, Wyvern, but rather what appears to be a Post-It note golem. The walking mass of Post-It notes slowly hobbles towards the Recruiter’s desk, several of its notes falling to the ground as it does so, the phrases “Contact Treant Hill” and “Don’t Forget to Scheme” listed on them amongst other things. Upon arriving at the desk, the “golem” seats itself in the principal chair and claws at its face with it’s Post-It note hands until it eventually reveals the scaly visage of Wyvern. “Sssorry for the wait.” hisses Wyvern as he picks up HappyBuddha’s application by means of the sticky ends of several Post-It notes. “I’ll read over this poem in a jiffy.” HappyBuddha cracks a small smile and nods eagerly as Wyvern begins avidly reading over his application, marking several interesting passages by sticking Post-It notes that read “Buy Highlighter Markers” on them. After he’s finished, the reptilian Elder scratches his scaly chin, curses as it gives him several Post-It note paper cuts, and hisses: “A very good poem, HappyBuddha, and certainly an acceptable application…. though I do have one concern.” “Ah?” mutters HappyBuddha, his smile quickly fading as Wyvern nods and points to a Post-It note on his forehead that reads “Tend to Worries.” “Yesss… it’s the line ‘Slump against a pillar,’ located in the fifth stanza. I’m afraid that in the wake of the Quincuinox, I can’t risk you leaning against any of the Pen’s pillar supports… goodness knows, the damage bills for our abode are already skyrocketing.” Wyvern lets out a happy sigh. “Good thing that evilness is still ignorant!” With that, the overgrown lizard stamps HappyBuddha’s application ACCEPTED, afterwards sticking a Post-It note that reads “Remember to Thank Applicants for Their Patience” onto it while he begins to gather up the notes he had previously removed from his face. ;-) OOC: A very good poem and an ACCEPTED application, HappyBuddha. Welcome to the Mighty Pen! I'm happy to see that you finally decided to apply, and I look forward to reading more of your writing and participating with you in roleplaying in the future. Thanks for your patience in waiting for this response, and once again, welcome!

5/22/04 "The Worse Lines of This Collection as of 5/22/04" A short poem by Evan Litwack, presented in a series of adjective trifecta. "The scene lingered, so I thought I'd share it." Arrogant, cocky, vain. "Far above the bag lie the points of two Melody Record bags curiously curving down towards the waste and risking a sky dive." Meaningless, empty, blank. "I tried not to tear my eyes from the grafittied walls and passing lots, but then left observations for interactions." Self-centered, pompous, void. "You, the purpose behind all poetry, the meaning behind the typing of every word." Generic, cliched, broad. "You- I bought every one of them clothes on your back!" Purposeless, hollow, vague. None stoop to the lows of "Diamond," or wallow in the shallowness of "Intentions," so there are worse still. Unless, of course, this poem is the worse; a stranglehold, a noose of inspiration, tightly knit through self-depreciation.

Wyvern whimpers to himself and glumly rubs first his right cheek, then his left cheek, recovering from the iron glove slap and Alaeha's slap respectively. Grumbling to himself and wandering towards the buffet tables, the overgrown lizard raises a brow as he notices the interesting developements in Gwaihir's rapidly evolving uniform. "Hey Gwai." mutters Wyvern, narrowly dodging a vine that whips out of the elf's outfit as he slowly approaches. "Why are you lying on the ground like that? Looks like you've already had too much to dri-" The overgrown lizard suddenly pauses as he notices that Gwaihir's suit has roots growing out of it that have become embedded in the Conservatory's floor, and jumps as four more vines sprout out of the outfits central body and begin reaching towards the air. Noticing several princes that have become caught within the weeds of the outfit and recalling a certain failed party that involved large plants eating things, the reptilian Elder decides to take evasive action. "Note to self: do not ask the Dreamer for advice concerning future tailoring schemes..." mutters the lizard to himself as he reaches for the nearest bottle of Almost Draconic Tango Mandarine Bitter-sweet Stomach Mailting Crawfish Wine,™ quickly opening the cork with a claw and pouring its contents onto the area surrounding the plant suits base. The overgrown lizard watches happily as the vines that had once sprouted with such energy begin rising and descending woozily in a slow and uncertain manner. Wyvern scratches his scaly chin for a moment as he watches the spectacle, the motion of the vines vaguely reminding him of amusement parks, until an idea suddenly hits him. "I've got it!" exclaims the overgrown lizard, rubbing his scaly claws together as a money-making scheme enters his diabolic mind. "Stay right here Gwaihir, I'll be back in a sec!" "As if I had much of a choice..." mumbles the Deputy Loremaster, trying to budge unsuccessfully as the roots of the plant firmly hold him down. The elf raises a brow as he notices Wyvern wandering back carrying several large silver food platters left over from buffet table #2, the table that Stick had previously devoured. "Wyv, what the heck are you doing?" Wyvern ignores Gwaihir's question as he gleefully attaches a giant animal-shaped food platter to the tip of each vine, and watches as the vines proceed to slowly carry the silver animals up and down. Scratching his scaly chin again, the lizard mumbles: "Now, to find a way to get these vines slowly spinning in a circle..." Carefully examining the base of Gwaihir's suite and poking at various areas to see if it causes any reactions, the greedy lizard accidentally touches a ticklish spot on Gwaihir's shirt, causing the elf to laugh and fidget in spite of himself. Much to the lizard's surprise, the laughter and fidgets of Gwaihir cause the weeds on his shirt to shift, which in turn causes the vines to slowly move in a circle. An evil grin suddenly makes its way across Wyvern's face. "Wait a minute." exclaims Gwaihir, suddenly realizing the nature of Wyvern's scheme. "N-no, you wouldn't!" But before Gwaihir can continue to protest, Wyvern has taken a giant feather from the peacock platter at buffet table #9 and gained the attention of Mitch the security guard. "Mitch..." hisses Wyvern sinisterly, rubbing his scaly palms together with glee. "I have an important job for you this evening. You are to survey Gwaihir and his suite here, now to be collectively referred to as the 'Gwerry-Go-Round,' and charge people two geld per ride on an animal. To get the attraction spinning in motion, simply tickle Gwaihir with this feather until it starts to spin. All profits will be going to me, of course." Mitch stares uncertainly at a rather nervous and infuriated-looking Gwaihir as Wyvern sets up a sign in front of the partys newest attraction that reads "Gwerry-Go-Round! Only Two Geld Per Ride!" With that, the overgrown lizard lets out a triumphant laugh and runs off, only to be promptly run over by a mob of Prince fans headed towards the stage.

Wyvern enters into the Cabaret Room sporting a handlebar moustache and googly eye glasses as a disguise. "Did ssssomebody say... Imposter?!" With that, the overgrown lizard whips out several handy Almost Dragonic Brand KUoDs™, including such favorites as the SPLATula (now comes with Melba leftovers), the 'I Scream' Scoop, the Chopsticks of Evil, and Sinister Sponge... He then proceeds to set up a merchandise stand, and encourages everyone to engage in KUDOs! (Kitchen Utensil Destructive Operations) ;-) OOC: Greetings to both Imposter and DoctorEvil, excellent to see you two again. As Zool so politely put it: "YO! DUDES! STOP! Say HI some more!" ;-)