Wyvern

Hi folks, First of all, I really wanted to thank you all for the comments, I really appreciate them. :-) I realize that this thanks is coming kind of belated, but it definitely took me a long time to compile The Mighty Pen "Narratives" and I did it for all you peeps at the Pen, so it's great to hear that some of you really enjoyed it. Big Pointy One - I want to thank you in particular for your two comments, as it was really cool to read your initial thoughts and your thoughts after listening to it a number of times. Glad to hear it had some rotation! Thanks again, everyone. :-) Anyway, the other reason I wanted to post back in here is this: The Mighty Pen "Epilogue EP." A short companion piece to The Mighty Pen "Narratives" featuring tracks chosen by folks who didn't make it onto the "Narratives" compilation, including Patrick, mai takekaze, The Portrait of Zool, and Kikuyu Black Paws. Cover photo by Antoine Bantigny, used with permission. Additional lettering and cropping by yours truly. Be on the lookout for it!

Wyvern gags and hacks up a bit of punch, the excess fructose making sloshing sounds in his reptilian stomach. He blows some wet ashes from his snout and wipes them on the snack counter next to the dessert tray, killing a few appetites in the process. The overgrown lizard raises an apologetic claw to Degorram as she passes by, mumbling something about how she looks good in black and how her skin was hot to begin with anyway. The reptilian Elder then turns to Kikuyu and gives her an evil eye, a wide smirk slowly making its way over his snout. "Y'know what Kikuyu? Forget about the trickss, I'm gonna give you a Halloween treat for a change." Wyvern hobbles over to Kikuyu's resting spot and spreads his wings with as much bravado as he can muster, which doesn't amount to much given the wooden props that his wings rest on. "A danceoff! You, me, and the half-incinerated band. Right here, right now. Preferably before any more inssstruments burn down. Let'sss do it!" Wyvern grabs Kikuyu by the hand and begins pulling her towards the dancefloor, hobbling in overdrive in the hopes of reaching the dance area before the band's rousing rendition of "Undead to Me" is over. His pushes forward as he notices Mynx and Stephen grooving on the dancefloor, not seeing the puddle of swamp water that rests on the floor in front of him. Wyvern grits his teeth as he suddenly slips over the wet spot, losing his balance and pulling Kikuyu down with him... ;-)

"Ooohhhh, great to ssssee ya back Silver Wind." Wyvern squints as he adjusts the Almost Dragonic Brand Goblin Torture Rack Picture Frame™ that acts as the statue's body, careful not to tip over the Almost Dragonic Brand Spikey Troll Baseball Bats™ that have been propped up as the statue's legs. The overgrown lizard doesn't even turn to glance at Silver Wind's folder, preoccupied by fitting the pieces of the Lady Winter Nook puzzle together. "'Fraid I can't shake yer hand from here sssince we got construction going on, but thanksss a bunch!" Wyvern pauses, then turns his eyes towards Silver Wind for a moment. "Of course, like last time, I'll need a dessscription of the photo and some sense of what this Lady Winter chick looks like, just ssso that I can be sure that it's worthy of my records. And I alssso wanna hear what ya went through to get it, for proper documentation purpossses." Wyvern turns his eyes away from Silver Wind as he glances down at a construction checklist. "Alssso, if ya wouldn't mind, I'd like to have a sheet with a little description of you on it. Y'know, physical quirks, general wardrobe, looks, etc. You could tack it over in the Piazza of Portraits or just hand it to me here. Not as much of a requirement as the other stuff, but I wanna make this statue as close of a fit as possible, so any details'd be good."

"Exxxxxcccellent." Wyvern licks his lips and lets out a little squeal of anticipation, then squares his claws to get a better picture of the area surrounding Silver Wind's poem. The overgrown lizard tilts his head, then raises a claw to his teeth and lets out a shrill whistle with a hissy undertone. Two troglyodytes wearing hard hats immediately scurry into the Banquet Hall through opposite entrances, rolling out the yellow "Construction Zone" tape as they approach the area that will hereby be referred to as "Lady Winter Nook." The reptilian Elder snorts and nods as he reviews a checklist that one of the troglyodyte's hands him, then begins setting some Almost Dragonic Brand Steel Irons™ on the potentially flammable carpet in the hopes of achieving a high-heeled shoes look. "Bessst o' luck! I'll be workin on that mini-statue..."

The news cameras tune in to a wide horizon-like shot of a cherry tabletop, its particular high-elf design immediately identifying it as a table of Custos Manor. The cameras zoom out in a less-than-professional manner and begin circling the large conference hall of Salinye's hostel, the magnificent curved window and elegant chairs in a condition that wouldn't suggest that an undead invasion had once occured here. The cameras pause as they reach a small bookcase of leather bound tomes, focussing on Wyvern as he reads through the "Almost Dragonic" section of the "most heinous" race compendium. "Oh, hello there, welcome to the latest Almost Report." Wyvern grins and snaps the book shut, then tosses it back onto a random spot on the bookshelf. He leans back against the shelf and presses his claws together. "This evening, we take you to Custos Manor in another exclusive Almost Report invasion. With the recent return of Salinye, we figured it'd be better to do it now and avoid the hassstle of dealing with permissions when she steps back into her quartersss." Wyvern winks and lets his forked tongue hang loose, then begins wandering through the chamber and eyeing the elegant decorations, estimating their value in his scaly noggin. "In Pen news this evening, Ozymandias' recent foressst seminar ended in a rare Daft Punk sighting at the Pen, complete with robotsss and blinking lights." Wyvern curses inwardly over not having been there to tap the event for geld, then clears his throat and continues. "It also resulted in three new Pen Pages, and a new Pen Quillbearer. Congratulationsss're going out to Degorram, Blby, Nyarlathotep, and Ashtonblades... I'll be contactin' the lot of ya for associated ranking fees shortly!" Wyvern strikes a claws up as he continues walking through the conference hall, only to come to an abrupt halt as he notices the small bureau on the right side of the grand window. The design must've been worth at least 550 geld, but the pitcher of water that crowns the bureau gleams menacingly under the light of the hall. Wyvern bites his lip and glances at the cameras, then slowly backs away from the Wyvern ward. He takes a seat in one of the conference room's beautiful mossy green chairs instead, implanting his tail stinger in its ornate pattern. "In further news this evening, the 'Under the Name Doodad' vote has led to a second round of votes on the subject. The technical title of this new vote is 'Under-the-Name Info,' but we here at the Almost Report like to call it the 'Under-the-Name Doo Dis or Doo Dat?' vote." Wyvern curls his tongue back into his mouth as he focuses on the cameras with a serious expression. "Please Please PLEASSSE vote pro-geld in thisss vote! You know how much I like ogling other people's geld, and I'd hate to lose the privelege." Wyvern kicks his feet up on the cherry table and stretches his wings as he continues. "For our final item of news this evening, Salinye's come back to the Pen in style with a new life question based on Living Fiction to sink yer teeth into. Go check it out and drop some of yer thoughts." Wyvern pauses and turns for a moment as a troglyodyte reporter steps from behind the cameras and hands him what looks like a giant pair of rusty scissors. "And ssspeaking of Salinye, it's high time I ended thisss report and set about making those garden recreation room peeping holes I was planning on. The vinesss covering those walls shouldn't stand a chance against this Almost Dragonic Brand Giant Hedge Skimmer™ (now on sale for 40 geld)!" Wyvern clears his throat, then lets out a villanous laugh and pounces out of his seat to do his dirty work. The cameras black out to lessen the already incriminating evidence.

Nice poem, Silver Wind. :-) I really like how you contrast Lady Winter's innocent appearance with a deeply founded sense of desperation and cruelty. Still, it's hard not to feel some sympathy for her when considering her optimistic approach towards romance, particularly in light of her agony over her womb and her utter loneliness. The first stanza stood out to me with its comparison of stained snow to tainted virgin's blood, though the adverb "seemingly" in the fifth line felt a bit cumbersome to me and didn't really seem to add anything to the stanza. Wyvern hisses and flips through volumes 1 and 2 of his Naughty Nymph catalogues, then raises a brow and snorts a small smoke ring as he notices a new discrepency deep within his tomes. "Hrmph. Ssseems you've hit another blind ssspot in my catalogue, Silver Wind." Wyvern flashes a hungry crocodile grin in Silver Wind's direction and begins rubbing his claws together. "I uhhh, don't sss'pose you might be willing to hazard the articsss to fetch me a photo of this Winter chick?" Silver Wind frowns and stares at Wyvern with a blank expression, her long silence speaking volumes. "Now, before ya jump to any conclusssions, it's pure coincidence that you've managed to depict two mythic gals that I don't have proper 'documentation' of yet. Very rare, very rare indeed. I'd only need one photograph of this lady since I tend to focus on the frigid ones less, though of course it'd still have to be a picture capable of melting glacial caps if you catch my drift." Wyvern winks twice and snickers, then scratches the back of his right horn. "I sss'pose that in exchange, I might be able to mount a miniature Silver Wind statuette made from Almost Dragonic products as a frame to keep yer poem in. Waddaya sssay?" ;-)

Wyvern races into the Cabaret Room with a toothy grin plastered over his face, the unmistakable sound of Salinye's voice triggering the giddier side of the reptilian Elder's brain. The overgrown lizard scoots across the Cabaret rug and practically trips over his own tail as he zooms in and glomps Salinye in a big scaly hug. Wyvern twists his stinger in the carpet fibers as he squeezes Salinye, planting it there in the hopes of using the ol' "my tail's stuck" excuse should responsibility rear its ugly head. "Sssssssaaaallliiinnnyeeee! Great to see you around." Wyvern lets out a gentle hiss as he lets Salinye go and gives her room to breath. He then pulls out two Almost Dragonic Brand Long Distance Shot Glasses™ and a bottle of Chateau du Bruteweiser. "Thanksss so much for the update, glad to hear yer doing well. Wanna sip?" Wyvern uncorks the bottle with one of his teeth and lets some of the beer fizz foam into his mouth. He balances the two tiny shot glasses on the back of one of his claws and begins attempting to fill them unsuccessfully, making a mess of the surrounding rug. "About Bertha... that was her name, right?" Wyvern cringes at the thought of Salinye's muse and the nasty prank that Yui pulled on him after a certain date. "If you choose to bring'er here, you should really consider getting her something more to wear. Jussst so happens there's a sale on Almost Dragonic Brand Two-Headed Giant Barf Bags™ if yer interested. They're designed for large giants with motion sickness, but might fit a troll as a less revealing yet equally fashionable alternative to a bikini..." ;-) OOC: Great to hear from you, Salinye. I'm glad that you've been doing well, and am glad that the Pen continues to be an influence and source of inspiration. Here's hoping we get to see more of you!

"Hoooo boy..." Wyvern grits his teeth as the cumin begins finding its way to his snout, still following Silver Wind by the hand and moving back onto the dancefloor. A trail of red dust sprinkles from the lizard's tail and puffs from his scales left and right. "Awwww geeze. Of all the dirty... *sniffle.* Errrrk." Wyvern comes to a sudden halt, scratching at his snout and trying to remove the traces of cumin powder surrounding it. Silver Wind takes Wyvern's stop as a signal to start dancing again, and goes straight back into her impressive rendition of the Witch's Twist. "Uhhh, S-Silver Wind? Maybe I should go get a-" Wyvern's eyes fix themselves on Silver Wind's graceful motions, and he goes still as the twists and curves of her dance mesmerize him. Once the overgrown lizard snaps from his trance, it's already too late. He sniffles loudly, then grabs Silver Wind by the hand and twists her far to the right in a dance maneuver, aiming his snout to the left as he lets out an monstrous sneeze. A huge gush of flames fires from his mouth as his sinuses once again get the best of him. The flames fly by the other party-goers harmlessly, but crash against the cobwebbed wall where Zool's Portrait sits. Fortunately, the ultra-absorbant cobwebs surrounding Zool douse the flames in their entirety. Unfortunately, the webs themselves are reduced to ash and render Zool's costume that much less sinister. "Ssshhhoot." Wyvern starts sniffling again as more cumin reaches his nostrils. The overgrown lizard frowns as Silver Wind swerves back in front of him in the dance, then quickly lifts her off of her feet and holds her in the air with trembling claws. He lets out another enormous sneeze under her legs, the resulting flames soaring in the direction of the band's stage. The female zombie backup singers are burnt to a crisp as the fireball explodes upon impact. The Lord of the Night begins playing his organ faster, driven by the flames surrounding him, which results in a stronger dance tune. Wyvern coughs black smoke and lifts his snout to the sky to clear his nostrils... only to get a knee to the face! "Owww!" Wyvern sets Silver Wind down with a grunt. She promptly places her hands on her hips and frowns while the overgrown lizard grumbles and rubs his cheek. "I wassn't staring up yer skirt, I ssswear!" Wyvern snorts... then sniffles, then sniffles and snorts again. He lifts both of his claws to his snout, the distinct itch of cumin in his nostrils. "Dangitall." Wyvern's eyes grow slightly wider with each sniffle, escalating to a frantic state. "Is there a flame warder in the house?!?!"

Glad to see that you two finished this story, I was wondering how it was going to end. :-) I found it very interesting on the whole, though oddly perhaps the most interesting thing about it to me was that it felt very self-therapeutic. I don't know if it's just me, but I really had the sense that the two of you were writing this more for yourselves than for an audience. I don't mean that in a negative way, since I think that it gave the story a very personal undertone beyond the magic and haunted house that kept me interested in it. I think that framing it as a story being told to the naked angel particularly makes it feel like a confession of sorts, and I can't help but feel that there's some event beyond the story that you two are reconciling with this. Of course, it could have also just have been a fictional gap that the two of you felt needed filling... Another thing I like about this story is that there's a sense of closer bonding between Tanuchan and Mynx by the end of it, and I've definitely noticed the two of you collaborating in a number of threads as of late. Cool to get a bit more insight on the backstories of your two characters as well. I sort of breezed back through the Werewolf thread associated with that Halloween party, I don't think I paid it as much attention to it as it deserved back in the day... I tend to skim or skip over Werewolf threads since Pen characters/history are not typically involved in them, but this one definitely had a great deal of dark and heavy pennite interactions. The cause of the spirit is not 100% clear to me after breezing through it... was this shadow spirit created through cryptomancer's reading of the Necromicon and the bad memories associated with Gryphon's interaction, or was it the thing that sparked that bad memory in the first place? I feel like if I had a clearer sense of the origins of this spirit, I could draw more out of this recent story... Not really the fault of the writing so much as of me needing a Cliff's notes version of it! Thanks for sharing this little piece of Pen history. :-)

A stack of discarded doodles near the Office filing cabinets stirs as the tip of a tail stinger emerges from its depths. This is followed by two crimson wing tips and two horns, along with the groggy-looking scaly head attached to them. Wyvern stretches and yawns as he lifts himself from his napping spot, grabbing a half a bottle of Bruteweiser from the floor and guzzling its remains as a substitute for coffee. The overgrown lizard rips at the papers clinging to his scales and trudges over to his desk, tossing the empty booze bottle to the side as he notices The Researcher's letter resting on top of his morning smut mag. Wyvern takes a seat and lifts the note to his snout, reading it over and reaching for a dirty quill. Were the Recruiter's Office home to the National Half-Orc Olympics, the overgrown lizard would have received two halfling bones down for literacy. Wyvern scratches his chin and sets the letter down once he's finished, then grabs a piece of doodle paper still clinging to his horns and begins jotting a letter response, orating it to himself as he writes. "Hrmmm." Wyvern licks a claw as he skims over his writing, swaying his tail back and forth and thinking out loud. "I wonder if that hiss at the end is too informal for this sorta thing? Ah well, I've never been one for etiquette. Hmmm, but would the additional grant be too mu-" "Uhhh, Wyvern?" The Researcher clears his throat and shifts in his seat, staring at the Elder of Initiates as if the lizard were a madman. "I'm here, just so you know." Wyvern jerks his head up and bites his lip as he notices The Researcher sitting in the back of the Office, his eyes shrinking at the thought of him eavesdropping on the entire letter writing process. The overgrown lizard clears his throat loudly, scoots out of his chair, and forces an awkward laugh. "AH. Ahaha. Professor Hasssssssssium, I didn't sssee you there!" Wyvern hides his would-be response letter, then stamps a blank sheet of paper ACCEPTED and hands it to The Researcher. "As for your uhhh, grant... why don't we start with a Pen membership pass, and then we can discuss other business-related matters later?" ;-) OOC: An ACCEPTED application, Researcher. Welcome to the Mighty Pen! :-) I hope you find us a friendly and welcoming community to write with, and am looking forward to roleplaying with you more and to reading anything else you choose to share with us here. Once again, welcome!

Guinea Pig jerks his head up as the Office window is suddenly rammed open. The applicant twitches his nose and huddles his paws back defensively as a scaly leg juts its way through the opening. Wyvern collapses into the Office with a signature lack of class, performing a Wing-Wacked Triple Horn Roll on the ground and accumulating papers over his scales in the process. Were the Recruiter's Office home to the National Half-Orc Olympics, the overgrown lizard would have received five halfling bones down. "Someone here in need of an application responssse?" Wyvern shuts the window using his tail stinger and glances around the Office, yawning a little and revealing his teeth. He scratches his head and steps forward, almost stepping on Guinea Pig in the process. A frightened squeak from the applicant turns the reptilian Elder's eyes to the floor. "Oh, it's you! Sssorry 'bout that. Nice to see ya Guinea Pig, glad ya made it to the Office." Wyvern breaths an awkward hiss as he slowly moves his foot away from the area next to where Guinea Pig stands, leaving a new footprint in the paperwork coating the floor. The overgrown lizard clears his throat and brushes a number of papers from his scales, then reaches down and plucks the poem scrap from Guinea Pig's hand. "Hmmm..." Wyvern stares at the ink-stained former receit sideways, trying to make out the letters between the various ink blots. He turns his beady eyes towards Guinea Pig. "I don't sss'pose you might be able to fetch me a magical spot-removing rag? There should be some available in the Cabaret Room." Guinea Pig's eyes and face droop as he considers Wyvern's request and the daunting stairs that he'd have to ascend and re-descend to fufill it. Noticing the applicant's worried expression, Wyvern sniffles and turns the application scrap right-side up. "Eh, never mind, should be able to read it fine." Wyvern's eyes skim over the words of the poem, turning ever-so-often towards Guinea Pig to make sure that he hadn't scared him off with his previous request. Once the reptilian Elder has finished reading the piece, he grins and kneels down to speak with Guinea Pig on a more personal level. "Niccce poem there Guinea Pig, could make a great reader in an intro biology class for firssst grade guinea pigs. I think there'sss serious potential there, especially if we could get an audio tape recording of Morgane reading it." Wyvern snickers and reaches for his acceptance stamp, inking the tiny scrap even further with an ACCEPTED. The lizard then raises a claw to his chin and glances down at Guinea Pig, examining him for his weight in geld. "Y'know Guinea Pig... if yer searching for a place to stay at the Pen, I gotta piece of property that ya might be interesssted in." Wyvern lifts the rickety doorless cage that is Almost Dragonic Brand Guinea Pig Deluxe Health Spa Resorts.™ He sneers and gestures towards it with a claw. "Nuncio the guinea pig bodyguard has already placed a bid on it, but I'm sssure a research guinea pig of yer background might have the means to outbid ihim. Waddaya say? I'll letcha think about it." ;-) OOC: An ACCEPTED application piece, Guinea Pig. Welcome to the Mighty Pen! :-) I've enjoyed reading your RP posts thus far and responding to the threads, and am looking forward to RPing with you more as well as to reading any other things you choose to post or participate in. I hope you find the Pen a friendly and welcoming community to write with. Once again, welcome!

The toot of a high-pitched kazoo signals a camera fade-in, revealing the cold gray stone and fashionable cobwebs of Tamaranis' crypt. The cameras slowly pan around the central room of the vampiric dwelling, passing by a standing skeleton lamp and a old wooden bookcase of dusty tomes before pausing at Wyvern. The reptilian Elder adjusts the position of his tail on the coffin where he sits, then presses his claws together and grins towards the news cameras. "Greetingsss, and welcome to another Almost Report." Wyvern straightens a painting stand next to the coffin and stretches his wings. "Reporting to you live this evening from Tamaranis' quarters, or as live as one can report from these sorts of quartersss that is. Stay tuned as we introduce Almost Dragonic Brand Crystal Ball Shopping™, with a live art auction that will be going on over the course of this report as it's broadcast. Anyone watching the report should be able to bid on the magnificent paintings presented by means of carrier bats, which will transport your written geld bid from your quarters to the crypt. Now on with the show." Wyvern pauses and turns his eyes as his exclamation triggers an ominous creak from somewhere deep within the crypt. He clears his throat of a few ashes, then slams his claws down on the coffin lid and hisses: "At the head of the report thisss evening, pennites are encouraged to drop their votes and feedback on Under-the-Name Doodads in the Cabaret Room. Your thoughts and votes could have a major effect on the way that feedback is approached at the Pen, so be sure to contribute if it's of concern to you." Wyvern reaches down and pulls up a piece of doodled art from last week's report, which depicts Wyvern asleep while other Pen members assault each other with crowbars. He places the sheet of paper on the painting stand with a grin. "And ssspeaking of Doodads, the Almost Report is auctioning off this luxurious painting and collector's item, entitled 'Lizard Sleeps While Pennites Weep.' The picture is a perfect compliment to pillows and crowbar supply cases around the Pen. Now accepting bidsss." Wyvern waits for a few minutes for any carrier bats to arrive, then scratches one of his horns when none show up and turns towards his notes. "Voting Pen memberssss should also be aware that the next set of Pen promotions have already rolled around, and that they're encouraged to mail their thoughts on the potential candidates to voting@themightypen.net. Unfortunately, due to the timing of the promotions announcement and thisss report, thossse who haven't voted yet only have until 11:59 PM on Halloween night (10/31/07) before the member feedback phase of the vote is closed. Ssso get yer thoughts in pronto if yer interested!" Wyvern pulls another sheet up, this one a torn half sheet of paper featuring a doodle of Wyvern from the last Almost Report. "And ssspeaking of potential candidatesss, this brilliantly artistic rendition of yoursss truly entitled 'Half Self Portrait' isss a potential candidate for picture most likely to infatuate female pennites. Just look at those stick figure abs! Now accepting bids." Wyvern smiles widely and waits for a few minutes, then tilts his head to make sure he's not missing any squeaks or sounds of flapping wings. Once he's sure that no bats are coming, the lizard grumbles something under his breath and turns back to his notes. "In further news: The Portrait of Zool, who is hosting a vibrant Pen Halloween party that you should all check out, has recently announced that the Mighty Pen fundraiser is now successfully complete. Keeping this in mind, it's never too late to donate to upkeeping the hosting of this site, and we appreciate any and all donations whenever they may occur. Jussst direct your attention to the 'Paypal Donate' button next to the Calender and Member listing at the top of the screen if you ever feel like contributing something." Wyvern sets another sheet of paper from last week's report on the stand, this one depicting doodles of the "Pen is Mightier than the Sword" logo and several bags of money. "Speaking of donations, this painting entitled 'Pen$ i$ Mightier' features two of my favorite thingsss in life: money and the Mighty Pen. It'sss a good luck charm that no money bin should be without. Now accepting bidsss (combination lock codes for money bins acceptable)." Wyvern shuffles his notes, then waits patiently for a few moments until the distinctive squeaking of bats can be heard. The overgrown lizard jumps from his seat and lets out a squeal of excitement, only to notice that the approaching bats do not have bid notes and are in far greater number than he'd anticipated. Wyvern gulps and throws his claws over his horns as the swarm of bats floods into the crypt space. The news cameras promptly black out with the rest of the room.

Very nice short, Yui, great to read something new from you. :-) I really like the three different perspectives you offer on the treasure (or treasures, rather, since the young roc's mini-horde counts as well). Out of the three characters, Jochim strikes me as the most developed with the hints of his bitter past in the first segment, though all three of the characters have little quirks that make'em stand out. The weird merging of perspectives at the end is also a very interesting and original twist to me, and the way you intertwine the events of the three characters is well done. Two things to possibly consider for revisions: one thing is that I'm curious as to how large the young roc is exactly, since I recall Rocs being pretty huge mythic birds of prey but wasn't sure if you envisioned the young roc as a regular-sized bird or something larger that seizes Jochim and Ylen. The other thing is that, while I think the ending is a really cool twist, I couldn't quite figure out what the cause of their combining was exactly... I got a certain hint that it may have had to do with the enchantment Jochim purchases at the beginning and the grohlings contained in the treasure pouch, but it's sort of unclear at the moment. The magic/event that leads to their tranformation may not be considered that relevant in a short piece like this, but I think it would make for a more satisfying finish for the reader never the less! Anyway, aside from that, there's always room for expansion by developing the characters more... but all in all, I definitely enjoyed reading this, rust or no rust. :-) Thanks for sharing it Yui. P.S: Jochim must have great looks to reel in gals with those lines of his. x_x I certainly snarked at his 'sword' comment though!

"Ssssplendid." Wyvern grins at Silver Wind with a slightly bashful expression, then kicks the disfigured zombie head like a football to clear it away from the dining area. The head, now even more disfigured, lands in Sora Hikari's arms. "Dancing it isss! Just a moment." Wyvern jerks in the direction of the zombie band, careful not to tip over his 'technologically advanced wooden arm enhancements and professional skateboarding equipment.' He raises a brow as the Lord of the Night on pipe organ leans into a cobweb-covered microphone and speaks with a smooth radio announcer voice: "Thank you. We are Hootie and the Rulers of the Nine Hells. Up next, the smooth sounds of 'My Ghoul' and 'Sold his Soul to Hell (Zool Edit).' We're also taking organ donations for our lovely backup singers, just drop them off in the coffin next to the stage. And now... 'My Ghoul.'" Wyvern creaks his neck to stare up at the ceiling and rolls his eyes as the haunting chords of "My Ghoul" begin engulfing the Conservatory. He lets the mummy bassist play a few notes before carefully raising one of his feet and stomping it on the ground. "Come on boyssss!" Wyvern yells and snaps a claw, pointing in the direction of the band. The music pauses for a moment. "Hit it!" The zombie band members all scratch their heads and turn towards one another in confusion. They then pick up spiked clubs and turn to their keyboardist, a hunchback midget with a nametag reading "It." "Oh no no no!" Wyvern raises his claws, then grumbles and stomps his foot on the ground again to get the band's attention. "I mean play some upbeat dance musssic." The zombie band members turn to each other again and mumble amongst themselves for a moment before the wolfman lets out a long howl and begins playing the first chords of 'The Tombstone Shuffle' on his six-string axe. The other members of Hootie and the Rulers of the Nine Hells follow suite. "Alllriiiiiiggggghhhhhttt!" Wyvern shifts his arms to the sky, then turns to Silver Wind with a gleeful look in his eyes. "OK Silver Wind, let's see watcha got." With that, Wyvern begins dancing as best as he can given his current costume, which amounts to tiny motions to left and to the right.

Awesome story so far Patrick, I'm loving it! :-) The prologue immediately captured my attention, with the image of Inya dancing and the introduction of George's first person perspective and his knowledge of their eventual fate really stirring me. The transitions between different time periods related to Grimfalk's return also really appealed to me, and I like how you chose to incorporate a third person perspective for the "18 months before Grimfalk's return" period. It gave that time period a colder and more distant feel that I think fit the Imperial Army events of it well. It's also very interesting how Grimfalk's brother is continuously reborn in different shells to fufill the Prophecy, though the time frame of Chapter 2 might confuse some readers as it's listed as "410 years before Grimfalk's return," but actually spans several thousand years of lifetimes. You might consider framing that chapter more in the "410" setting as George reflects back on his different lives, as that might iron out any confusion. I also agree with Gwaihir that a few more period-oriented details for each of the different settings would help establish the time frames more. The sci-fi/fantasy feel is apparent, but it would cool to see more details pertaining to the styles and technologies of the times... they tend to change over the course of 2912 years, after all! Anyway, I'm definitely intrigued to see how these different time frames are intertwined and am really looking forward to reading the continuation. :-) Thanks for sharing this Patrick.

Wyvern twists his snout as Preprise mentions the "b word," folding the application poem and passing it back in the new Initiate's direction. "I'm afraid that a bath issss outta the question, my friend." Wyvern pulls his tattered agenda book out of one of his pockets as he speaks, twirling it with a claw. "Now, chocolate or booze pools are fair game, but water really doesssn't do it for me. If anyone expects me to bath in that ssstuff, I request Signe's presence to convince me with a bit of sponging!" Wyvern raises his little black book and flips through it with one claw, causing a few of the overused pages to fall into the endless mess of discarded papers scattered over the floor. The flipping stops as one of his claws lands on a page detailing the transaction of a bottle of Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash.™ "By the way Preppy, jussst throwing this out there, but my recordsss indicate that you owe me 50 geld for the purchase of a bottle of Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash.™ If ya'd like, I could tossss in the Almost Dragonic Brand Bull-Proof Matador Vest™ and call it 150 geld?" Preprise rolls his eyes and turns to leave the Office, only to pause for a moment as Wyvern races up to him and puts a scaly arm around his shoulder. "Now Preppy, thisss is yer pal Lizzy speaking here. We're both business buddies at this point, so I just want ya to know that there is absolutely NO rush in paying that 50 geld." Wyvern breaks into the most gentle and innocent grin he can muster, which sort of resembles a hungry crocodile. "In fact, I prefer that you hang on to it for now... I'm putting a 100% interest rate on the sum until it's paid, meaning that you can take your leisure time in paying it and that I can make quintuple the amount that I would have otherwise received! It'sss beneficial for both parties... especially if you have money to burn." With that, Wyvern strikes a claws up, pats Preprise on the back, and returns to his desk to look over some "important documents" from Naughty Nymph magazine.

Very nice poem, Silver Wind. :-) You paint a nice portrait of Autumn with some cool uses of language, with "burning triumph" and "hot red eye" standing out to me in particular. My favorite part of this poem was definitely the second stanza, however. One reason that stanza stood out above the rest to me is because it drew upon people ("Lovers") involved in the season and their emotions pertaining to it, which were powerfully driven across through the brown tinge of death in the leaves. While the other stanzas were nice, they weren't quite as captivating to me as that second stanza... perhaps because people and their impressions of nature are simply more intriguing to read about than descriptive pictures of nature itself. Between this and "Sweet Winter," I see a kind of seasonal theme emerging in your recent poetry... out of curiousity, is this intentional? :-) It reminds me of some of Tanuchan's work in a way, though done under your own style.

Wyvern groans and rubs one of his aching horns, leaning against his rickety 'professional skateboard equipment' and cursing over his foiled act of artist-unfriendly heroism. The overgrown lizard's groan is not pain-induced, but rather associated to the zombie band's lumbering rendition of "Great Balls of Mire," which stinks in more ways than one. Wyvern winces and grits his teeth as he passes by a few spots of wet swamp water that the band seems to be tossing around, not wanting to come into contact with any H2O. He turns his head as he notices Grimmael getting an unusual amount of female attention, with an oddly familiar-looking skull-faced girl and Kikuyu in her flowing bards shirt both approaching the servant. Wyvern zones out for a moment as his beady eyes focus on the way Kikuyu's shirt emphasizes her "scarves," but snaps out of his trance after getting some odd looks and loud throat-clearing sounds. He raises a bandaged claw to greet the two gals with a goofy grin, then turns to mingle with the rest of the party-goers, ever-cautious of the swamp water puddles that dot the floor. "Heyyy, Ssssora!" Wyvern hobbles forward and raises one of his 'technologically advanced wooden arm crutches' towards Sora Hikari, who stands next to the Conservatory's entrance. "Nice cowboy outfit you got there." "I'm a bounty hunter!" "Right." Wyvern grins awkwardly towards Sora, then gestures to her to enter. "Come on in, and don't mind the musssic. I'm sure the band will be finishing their rendition of 'Alwaysss Tear us Apart' soon." Wyvern grumbles as a zombie band member with a leg where an arm should be clashes down on a cymbal to accentuate his last word. The overgrown lizard retreats in the direction of the party lounge area, where he notices Mynx and Tanuchan chatting near a Conservatory couch. "Hiya Mynx and... Tanny?" Wyvern raises a brow and tilts his head, examining Tanuchan as if she were a piece of abstract art. He reaches down and adjusts one of his arm casts so that his claw is touching his chin in a "thinking lizard" posture. "Is there a contessst going on for 'costume with the most festive colorsss'? Cus' if there is, I'd really like to talk to you about booking some odds in favor of your current look, if ya get my drift..." Tanuchan stares glumly at Wyvern, then glumly at Mynx. A long moment of silence passes before the reptilian Elder forces an awkward rasp of a laugh. "Ehaahawhaw, errr... Wait right there, I'll uhhh... I'll get ya galsss some punch. Heh." Wyvern slinks away as well as one can slink when bandaged, in casts, and with wooden crutch-trolleys. As he moves towards the party's food table, two of the zombie band members begin losing limbs from their intense performances on triangle chime and wind flute respectively. Wyvern ignores the hand and the disfigured head that land near the food table as he spots Silver Wind dressed in a nice witch number, alone and snacking near a wall. He claps his claws together and hobbles up to her with a wide toothy grin. "Ssssilver Wind, great to see you here! How's tri-" Wyvern pauses and glances down as the disfigured zombie head rolls to a halt at his feet. Silver Wind stares down at the head as well, frowning and twisting her nose in distaste. "Well, I guessss we should sweep that up. Good thing you've got a broom on hand." Wyvern glances at the remainder of the zombie band, then back at Silver Wind. "If ya'd like, we could also 'sweep the rug' after that, if ya know what I mean. That is, IF these zombie bozos know any actual dance tunes."

"Lizzy???" Wyvern stares at Preprise with a baffled expression, then slowly breaks into an extra-wide business man grin. The overgrown lizard grabs one of Preprise's hands and shakes it in an excited manner. "Honessstly Preppy, I'm flattered that we're already on such familiar terms! I see a long and healthy business relationship building between us two." Wyvern shoves the Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash™ into Preprise's hands, ignoring the wisp of smoke that rises from a tiny crack on the jagged bottle's surface. "Indeed, your busssiness offer sounds most acceptable. I would be happy to publish yer 6 part piece in Almost Dragonic Brand Loseleaf Poetry Brochures™ for your 50 geld purchassse of this Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash™." Wyvern scribbles something in his tattered agenda book. "A few pointersss: each of your installments of The bliss of monogamy and the christian lifestyle should be between 50,000 to 70,000 wordsss in length in order to fit the spacing of the brochure. Part 1 will be due on October 28th in order to publish the brochure in a timely manner. Our reptilian editorsss will be hard at work cross-checking for raunchy detailsss while at the same time emphasizing your Christian lifestyle to the reader." Wyvern grins and squeals in anticipation, twisting his tail and extending a claw to accept his 50 geld.

Preprise glances up at the Office's Rolodex clock, curious as to what's taking the Elder of Initiates so long to arrive. The applicant's eyes flare up like an angry horse when he notices the hour, but his anger is put on hold as the Office window suddenly slams open, signaling the arrival of the Pen's resident Recruiter. Wyvern squeezes his way in through the opening with a bending wing and a shift of a tail, his short fall cushioned by a tall stack of unattended paperwork that rests adjacent to the window. A few of the loose pages of discarded schemes gust into Preprise's face as a light breeze flows in through the open window, and he brushes them away to rub his eyes in disbelief. "You...?" "Hiya Preppy, fancy seeing you here!" Wyvern slams the window shut and brushes a few stray leaves from his tunic, striking a grin full of razor sharp teeth. The lizard pulls at a twig tangled around one of his horns and approaches his Recruitment desk, snatching Preprise's poem from the top of the menacing piles. "Applying to the Pen are we? Hrmmm, lemme sssee here..." Wyvern nods and scratches his chin as he reads over Preprise's application poem, dipping one of his claws in a half-dry inkwell that lays hidden in the mess of his desktop and scratching some notes on the page. The overgrown lizard licks his lips once he's finished, then sets the poem on a relatively visible spot on his desk and raps his claws down on the page. "A fine poem, Preppy, but remember my advice on marketability." Wyvern snags the poem back back and steps up to Preprise, pointing at the final stanza. "Why ssset yourself for free when you could jussst as easily set a price on yourself? After all, I'm sure there're plenty o' rodeos out there that would pay a fair amount of geld for an angry horssse to challenge their top cowboys with. Ssspeaking of which..." Wyvern turns back to the Recruitment desk for a moment and dives under it, tossing clawfuls of paperwork left and right along with used candy wrappers, broken appliances, and tattered smut mags. The reptilian Elder eventually reemerges with an ugly bright red vest clutched in one claw. "If yer tired of not being able to win or lose in your matadoring, thisss Almost Dragonic Brand Bull-Proof Matador Vest™ is a sure-fire way to swing the bullfight one way or the other... probably the other." Wyvern holds up the vest, which looks more like a red jester suit than a matador uniform, complete with a neon red jester cap with glowing red bells. "Made outta 100% cotton, thisss vest is bound to make the bullfight 80% more interesting, or 20% of your money back. Only 85 geld!" Wyvern turns to his desk for a moment and huddles over it as Preprise examines the vest, secretively stamping "Angry Horse" ACCEPTED. The overgrown lizard glances left and right, hides the poem sheet, then turns from his desk and whispers to Preprise. "You oughta consssider this bargain well, Preppy... the state of yer application may depend on it." ;-p OOC: An ACCEPTED application poem, Preprise. Welcome to the Mighty Pen. :-) I hope that you find the Pen a very open and friendly community to share your writing with, and that you treat it in an open and friendly manner in turn. I look forward to reading more of your works, as well as collaborating with you in more communal writing projects. Once again, welcome.

"Thirty Fi-?!" Wyvern stammers and raises a claw, then pauses and bites his scaly lip as he glances down at the items in question. He slowly raises the Almost Dragonic Brand Candy Diamond Claw Ring™ back towards his snout to examine the exact value of the candy, licking his lips as the smell of the diamond once again reaches his nostrils. The overgrown lizard's eyes dart towards Preprise as he stuffs the candy ring into his mouth and crunches off the diamond in one bite. He attempts to clear his throat as he chews on the would-be sale item. "I'll give ya the Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash™ for 33 geld, and I'll tossss in a free Almost Dragonic Brand Payassociate Multi-thousand Geld Donate Button™ to boot." Wyvern pulls out a rusty shirt button with a rustier pin and the words "Pay Me" tagged on its surface. "Waddaya say, Preppy? I'm accepting any higher bidsss, of course!"

The news cameras flicker on to a sheet of mostly blank paper, possibly from Wyvern's Devil's Advocate folder, which has the words "Almoest Reeport" scrawled on it in a messy font. A brief off-key kazoo news medley cues up in the background and a claw reaches down to pull the sheet of paper away, revealing another sheet with a stick figure with wings and its arms open in greeting. Surrounding the stick figure are several ovals with dollar signs and doodles of nymphs sprawled across the ground. A hissy narrator voice cues up, unmistakably Wyvern's. "Welcome. I'm internationally renowned quadzillionaire playlizard Wyvern, and you're now tuned in to a new episssode of the Almost Report. Broadcasting to you live in a ssspecial animated edition... the closssest we could get to reporting from The Portrait of Zool's quarters, since they're illustrated and a bit hard to invade manually." A claw reaches out and tears the bottom half of the page off, revealing even more money bag ovals on the bottom half of the sheet of paper following it. The kazoo whistles up faintly in the background, providing sound effects. "At the top of the newsss this evening, The Portrait of Zool has been kind enough to start hosssting a new Mighty Pen fundraiser, the first in over a year and a half!" Wyvern removes the upper-half of the torn page, taking the Wyvern stick figure out of the picture and replacing it with the Pen is Mightier than the Sword logo and even more ovals with dollar signs. "The fundraiser is intended to raise money for the web-hosting costs of the Pen to keep this mystical location up and running, plus free of advertisements. We appreciate any donations that the membership is willing to give, though obviously noone is required to pay anything and we appreciate your contributions to the site even more! Ssstill, if you have any moolah you're willing to spare, there's now a 'Paypal Donate' button on the upper righthand corner of the Pen, next to the Calendar and Member listing. Now, the bad newsss in all this is that the other Elders have expressly forbidden me from using any of the money for ssschemes... but don't worry, I'm workin on an Almost Dragonic Brand Payassociate Multi-thousand Geld Donate Button™ asss we speak." The sheet of paper with the Pen is Mightier than the Sword logo and the oval money bags falls to the floor, and is replaced by a doodle of Waterlily dressed as the Great Pumpkin, with its mouth opened and its vines tangled around a number of stick figure pennites. "In further newsss, feel free to join the season spirit as the Mighty Pen celebrates Halloween in cossstume." A quill is lowered to Waterlily's picture and scribbles an additional tentacle holding a table of refreshments. "Dresss up, indulge in food and drink, and obssserve some potentially sexy pennite outfitsss. Open to all, with no long term commitmentsss required. We here at the Almost Report also hear a rumor of another Halloween-related party in November, but that's all ssspeculation with no concrete details at this point." A claw reaches down and tosses the Waterlilly picture to the side, revealing a stick figure doodle of Wyvern sitting at a desk with a "Zzzzzzz" over his head while a number of other stick figures appear to be attacking each other with crowbars. "To cap off this report, pennites should feel free to drop off their thoughts on how feedback should be approached at the Pen. All thoughtsss on the subject are appreciated, particularly given the impact that the tone of commentaries can have on the mood of the Pen!" The page is ripped to shreds and then tossed as confetti as the camera zooms in to the page after it, which reads "Th'End."

Wyvern hobbles into the Conservatory on a pair of flimsy crutches, white bandages covering his horns, claws, and chest. His left arm is in a cast while his right wing is held up on a wooden support board on wheels. A patch hangs over one of the overgrown lizard's eyes, with another adhesive patch hanging over the end of his scaly snout. Wyvern grunts and creaks his neck in the direction of a voice that comes from the Cabaret wall. "Hey there Wyv. What're you dressed as, a mummy?" "Nawww, not quite." Wyvern scratches at some itchy bandages, then approaches the Cabaret wall and sniffs at the thick layer of cobwebs that cover it. "I'm supposed to be that troglyodyte on the Almost Report that keepsss getting into ssserious accidents... I figure it'sss the least I can do for all the trouble he's put himself through. Don't tell anyone that though. My official cossstume title is hereby 'mummified pirate with technologically advanced wooden arm enhancements and professional skateboard.'" Wyvern pokes at the webs on the wall curiously, then begins peeling them off layer by layer. "Where'sss the pumpkin ale at anyway?" Wyvern freezes up as he notices the familiar mummy-wrapped figure of Zool's rubber chicken under the patches of web. The reptilian Elder goes slightly pale. "Oh my gawd, Zool issat you?! You look... infested. Wait right here, I'll get the paint diffusing insecticide pronto!"

"Oh exxxcellent, I'll sssee if it meets the qualifications fer sure." Wyvern tugs a tattered agenda book from his striped suit pocket and scrawls something about Preprise's poetry somewhere between "Scheme for geld" and "Scheme for geld." The overgrown lizard repockets the little black book with a spin of a claw, tattering it even more. "And thanksss for the headsss up about the breath. If only I had some kind of breath freshener that was inexpensive, but macho enough to maintain my male pride. But WAIT! What'sss this?" Wyvern reaches into his pouch and pulls out a bottle labeled Almost Dragonic Brand Magma Elemental Mouthwash™. The ashen black of the bottle doesn't make it gleam under the Banquet Hall lights, but its jagged surface does make it look sort of like a sacrificial dagger. "Thisss potent brand of mouthwash is sure to eliminate any sssigns of bad breath, and in many cases can eliminate any signs of breath at all! At the very least, the smoke that this thing generates will cloud the room enough for noone to recognize where the bad breath is coming from." Wyvern grins and points a claw at the bottle, then lifts the Almost Dragonic Brand Candy Diamond Claw Ring™ he had offered Preprise earlier. "For today only, I'm offering you both of these fine itemsss for a mere 48 geld! Trussst me, you'll need this mouthwash after eating the candy ring. Waddaya say Preppy?"

Thank you very much for the concert reviews, Patrick and Mynx! :-) I really enjoyed reading them and am glad that you enjoyed yourselves, even if the shows were a bit mixed in terms of quality (in Patrick's case, at least). Tonight, I went and saw the Soundcatcher Tour featuring DJ Vadim with Yarah Bravo & Abstract Rude, DJ Zeph & Azeem, and Pugslee Atomz at Mighty in San Francisco. I'd never been to the gallery/club Mighty before, and it turned out to be rather difficult to find. It's located on a street where a street sign is pretty hard to come by, and the only indication of the venu is a little streak of purple light against a brick wall... I kid you not, that was the only clue. Anyway, aside from the hidden location difficulties, it struck me as a pretty nice modestly sized venue with a stage large enough to host some professional acts. The first act of the evening was Pugslee Atomz, a veteran MC from Chicago who wasn't listed in the line-up but who happened to be tagging along for the tour. I've enjoyed a good deal of Pugslee's material in the past (he has quite a resume of underground releases) and had never seen him live, so his presence there was a pleasant surprise. Unfortunately, he failed to impress me in a live setting. He has a pretty nice voice for hip hop, but he seemed to be struggling to convey that voice through a distorted microphone and didn't really achieve the level of hypeness he was aiming for. His set was short and there were one or two good tracks, but overall his performance was something I felt I had to endure rather than enjoy. DJ Zeph & Azeem were the next to take the stage to perform. This is the third time I've seen them live, and the first two times floored me so naturally my expectations were high. Unfortunately, I think this was DJ Zeph & Azeem on a rare off-night, as their set had a couple of bright moments but also some low points that were not characteristic of their earlier performances. Some of it had to do with sound quality and mic difficulties, and some of it had to do with Azeem seeming tired and less energetic than usual. Still, their set did have a few signature highlights, like Azeem wandering through the crowd while incorporating different MC names into his verses. Overall, it was a decent but disappointing set. Finally, the headliner DJ Vadim took the boards to perform. He did a long set of mixing and scratching, which was a very well put together mix of soul, reggae, rap and even a bit of rock. His solo set was long, and I began to worry that Yarah Bravo and Abstract Rude weren't going to show. Fortunately, they did pull through, accompanied by a person on live bongos. They put on a long set with DJ Vadim, which was probably the best performance of the evening. The sound quality was once again questionable with a lot of microphone distortion really detracting from the music, but the talents of the various parties still shined through. Abstract Rude is a mainstay of Los Angeles' Project Blowed collective and has one of the deepest baritone voices in hip hop. He performed a number of good tracks, including a great track called "Basic Instinct" produced by a UK producer I'd never heard of, a few verses from the Pigeon John track "Life Goes On," and a yet-to-be-released track from his upcoming album "Dear Abbey" produced by Vitamin D(!) and coming out on Rhymesayers(!!). In short, he did his thing. And Yarah Bravo? Well... let's just say that she's the reason I chose to trek out to this show in the first place. She's definitely one of the most talented and promising female MCs in modern hip hop, and judging by her jubilant approach to music I figured that she'd be great to see in a live setting. I think I was more or less correct. For starters, like doseone, she has quite a visual stage presence. Between her funky hairdoo, her cute looks, her incessant dancing and her intriguing sense of fashion (sparkly shoes not pictured here), just watching her move about on stage is a pleasure in itself. But of course, she knows how to rap and sing damn well, and is a very sweet and positive person to boot... a lot of the songs she performed were about upliftment, thanking people, and encouraging us never to give up. Positive and inspiring music to balance out all that hate in hip hop. Now if only the sound quality of the venue were better. Overall, this wasn't the best show... but I still feel like it was worth the trip to finally see what Yarah Bravo's all about amongst other things. Bring on the new One Self material!