Wyvern

Wyvern awakens with a start, only to realize he's still having difficulties breathing despite no longer being surrounded by booze... Panicking for an instant, the lizard's mind races briefly before he discovers the source of the problem and breaths a sigh of relief. Gently lifting Cheyenne's left leg from his face, Wyvern inhales an enormous breath of air before setting it carefully onto the satin sheets next to him and lifting himself from the mattress. The sleeping form of Cheyenne fidgets slightly, mumbling something softly and clutching an adjacent pillow before reverting back to a motionless state. Wyvern stretches and yawns, carefull not to make any noises capable of awakening his snoozing sweetheart. After quietly dressing and grabbing his Endless Decanter, the lizard stealthfully tiptoes out of the room and snickers at his cunning ability to stay silent for a full 5 minutes... The egoistic reptile then procedes to slam the door shut behind him, only to suddenly realize his mistake as it causes an echoing bang that awakens just about everyone in the hall. What's more, the lizard suddenly notices that according to his watch, it had only been 4 minutes and 30 seconds since he had gotten up... Cursing noisily, Wyv quickly dashes out of the hall before people can start throwing alarm clocks at him... Running swiftly into the Pen's central kitchen, the overgrown lizard grabs a spare box of "Nanotoknonnen-Os™" off of a shelf and collapses into an available chair. Tearing open the box, the lizard rudely digs his claws into the cereal in the hopes of finding the "Free Seal of Armageddon" that supposedly came in every package. Pulling out a small action figure of a seal balancing a meteorite on it's nose, Wyvern spends a few moments in disappointment... Then, suddenly, the thought of animal action figures revives the memory of his dreams, and the lizard jumps out of his seat and exclaims: "A seal... just like that one that frollicked by the swimming pool of my mansion in my dream! Man, what a great fantasy... I really should have let Bill Gates..." Wyvern's short soliloquy is interrupted as the deep voiced narrator glares and growls "The OTHER dream...." Wyvern pauses for a moment, then exclaims: "Ohhhh... right! A seal... an animal, similar to those I need to collect for my quest! Only this one's kinda small, and not alive or genuine..." Wyvern glances at the small action figure, wondering if he'd be able to con the people of Ezoob into thinking it was an actual baby seal. Carefully polishing the figure with a napkin, Wyvern curses as it's head falls off in the process. Stooping to pick up the head in order to try to attach it back on, Wyvern curses even more as both of the legs and the tail fall apart. The lizard then remembers that "Nanotoknonnen-O Prizes™" are Almost Dragonic Products, and sighs in relief since he isn't losing anything valuable. Pulling out a piece of paper and a quill, Wyvern quickly jots down a messy train of thought that reads as follows: 1) Transport... need way to carry animals. Bag is preferable... large holding bag. O Harpy's Bag! 2/ Get Pen animals--- fuzzies, cabbage? 3. *Charge anyone who wants to tag along, then make'em build the ship!* 4 = need free booze pretzle supply... Tavern of the Morning Rose! Entry: clever disguise... 5 ----> Find and fill empty canyon for sailing across... big canyons. Map. 6: See second half 3 7~ Sail, and mission complete!!! Grinning at his plan as well as at his handwriting (which was contantly improving) the overgrown lizard suddenly jumps in shock as another Pen member enters into the kitchen. Quickly crumpling up his parchment and stuffing it in his right ear in a feeble attempt at hiding it, the lizard quickly pretends he's eating "Nanotoknonnen-Os™" and cringes at the flavor and contents of the wretched cereal that he himself had produced...

I decided to see both Evangelion "Death & Rebirth" and "The End of Evangelion" recently, since I'm a diehard fan and couldn't not pick them up when I saw them on the video shelves. ;p I was expecting to be let down since I heard bad things about them, but here are my thoughts on the two of them: Evangelion "Death & Rebirth" unfortunatly confirmed my prediction, as it was a big let down. The first part, "Death," retold all the episodes of the series in a needlessly confusing manner while the second part, "Rebirth," was strangely the first half an hour or so of "The End of Evangelion," which was unecessary since the entire thing was on the other DVD. What's more, the first 30 minutes of "End of Evangelion" were nothing special... Overall, not worth the few bucks it took to rent it. The soundtrack, composed mainly of classical pieces by Bach and Kanon, was undeniably great though... After watching "Death & Rebirth," I was expecting the worst from "The End of Evangelion..." but must say that overall, I liked it. It was definitely very over-the-top and probably had more symbolic biblical allusions and philosophical discussions then the original final two episodes, but was never the less very entertaining. Having said that, there were some very twisted emotional moments and it was far more graphic than the rest of the series. I'm interested... does anyone know if these episodes were aired on television or were they shown in the theatre? I honestly cannot see them broadcasting this stuff over national T.V... definitely not for children. It must have been at this point in their career that Gainax started smoking pot, since there was certainly a lot of psychadelic, drug-induced imagery throughout... Another thing I found interesting (spoiler alert for those that haven't seen it!) is that everybody always talks about how Shinji strangles Asuka in the end, but that's not quite an accurate interpretation. The way I saw it, Shinji tried to strangle Asuka, but when she put her hand up to his cheek he couldn't go through with it. She does turn her eyes to him and says "That's disgusting" at the very end, after all...

The vision came to him in a dream... Resting in an enormous mansion with numerous golf courts and swimming pools, Wyvern lounges on a golden throne while several Pen babes serve him king-size dishes on platinum platters and wear revealing bunny outfits. The regally dressed lizard laughs haughtily as he devours various exotic delicacies and is greeted by Ozymandias, one of his many servants. The humble Waiter of Waiters kisses all six of Wyvern's extended diamond pinky rings (mafioso-style) before asking Wyvern's permission to relay a message. Granting him the privelege of doing so, the lizard learns that Bill Gates has arrived at the front of the mansion and wants to grovel before Wyvern's throne and lick the dirt off of his boots. Considering this amusing option, the lizard decides to decline it in favor of the daily tax collector execution and the airing of the film "Die Melba Die," which featured Barbara Streisand in the roll of Melba and a young Sean Connery in the roll of the chainsaw-weilding Wyvern. The lizard still wasn't quite satisfied with the actor playing his roll in the film, however... after all, Sean Connery didn't begin to capture Wyvern's sexiness! Chuckling to himself greedily, the lizard huggles the bunny suite-clad Pen babes closer to him and... hey, wait a minute... this doesn't look much like a vision! Seems more like a fantasy, and it definitely doesn't have anything to do with an Arch of Ezoob... Darn it, this must be the wrong train of thought! Let's take it from the top... After a clearing of throats, a deep voice echoes: The vision came to him in a dream... Wyvern stands upon a glacier of ice that's floating on an endless ocean of booze, which stretches for as far as the eye can see. The reptile sniffles and frowns, noticing that the ice he's standing on is slowly melting away and wondering how he ended up here. As if to answer his question, the clouds in the sky drift apart and the lizard is suddenly covered in a radiant ray of light... This light doesn't come from the parting clouds, however, but rather from another part of the glacier where Brute, the Prophet of Booze, is fiddling restlessly with a flashlight. Turning to Wyvern, Brute grins and sets his flashlight aside, approaching the lizard and waving a pale hand in greeting. Pointing towards the booze ocean, the Prophet exclaims: "Isn't it beautifull, Wyvern?! Imagine, an entire ocean of booze...!" The greedy lizard calmly grins and nods to this statement before reverting to a state of complete panic and running around in circles screaming: "I DON'T WANNA DROWN!!! I DON'T WANNA DROWN!!!" Brute casually walks up to Wyvern and pats the sobbing lizard on the shoulder, stating in a comforting voice: "There there Wyv... there's no need to cry. This is just a vision, after all." Wyvern stops crying as he notices that on the ice by his feet, there is written "This Ice is Property of Visions Inc. (copyright control)." "A-a vision...? But why, Brute?" The pale Prophet grins at this question, extending his arms as widely as he can as if wishing to capture the entire ocean in his grasp... After a moment of silent contemplation, Brute turns to Wyvern and places a friendly hand on his shoulder, tears swelling in the Prophet's eyes and a trembling grin plastered on his face. Another long moment of silence passes before the Prophet of Booze speaks up and answers: "... I forgot." Wyvern's excited anticipation ends abruptly and his facial expression goes blank as he hears this response, accustomed to Brute's occasional memory lapses but still caught off guard... Brute smirks and shrugs when suddenly, a flock of seagulls flies by overhead and drops a barrage of conch shells onto the Booze Prophet's head, reviving his memory in the process. Wyvern briefly notices that each of the conch shells is labeled "Property of Visions Inc. (copyright control)" before Brute suddenly snaps a finger and exclaims: "I remember now! It's nothing much really... I just had to inform you that a quest that may determine your destiny is stationed before you. You must build a mighty ship out of free beer pretzles, fill it with a variety of animals, and sail it across an ocean of booze to the land of Ezoob, where parties occur all day, every day. As both the current owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze and the Patron Saint of Parties, you have been chosen to undertake this mission..." Wyvern's facial expression remains blank and his jaw drops, not having any time to respond as both he and Brute begin sinking into the booze ocean. The last words Wyvern hears whispered from Brute before fully sinking beneath the tasty waves and awakening from his slumber are: "... fear not the morning after...!" OOC: This will soon be opened as a freeform Summer RPing thread, since I know we have loads of amazing roleplayers and would love to see more of them writing! ;-) Participation should be open to all members... Check the Greenroom in the near future for further details!

I have two commentaries to give, one on Smallscale Mind Games' poem and another on Squashai's critique. I'll start with Smallscale's poem... This untitled poem is a very well written and intriguing piece of work. Your uses of rhythm and rhyme schemes are both well executed, and the story depicted in the poem is intriguing. The one place where I feel there's a slight slip in rhythm is the line "As he burned me in frozen ash..." A possible way of correcting this might be to change it to "As I was burned in frozen ash." Overall, like Cheyenne, I prefer the original version over the editted one... I can't wait to read the story connected to the poem, and think two potential titles to this work could be "Crystal Shards" or "Fallen." Now, though I normally don't do this, I'd also like to comment on Squashai's critique of the poem. While I admire the effort to try to aid the author in developing the poem, I feel that this criticism is poorly fabricated and quite subjective. The principal problem with the critique, in my opinion, is that it's based largely on personal taste and is over-critical. There is no need to critique every line, as simply pointing out any things that struck one as out of place in the poem would be sufficient. If the poem was editted in all of the ways detailed in the criticism, I feel that it would become a different work entirely, as it would be more of a "Squashai poem" than a "Smallscale Mind Games poem." In addition, the final inside jokes and personal references (i.e "BTW, are you that _strange_ girl that hangs out with the short girl that always wears a trenchcoat? Naw, you couldn't be.. XP") as well as similar personal comment posts by others after it are out of place on the Pen boards, and are best reserved for e-mails, Personal Messages, and the Pen's Shoutbox. Just my thoughts...

Autumn Sun fidgets nervously in her applicant easychair, clutching her Pen application tightly in her hands and wondering what was taking the overgrown lizard such a long time to arrive... Fiddeling with the quill that she had written her application story with, the jittery applicant bites her lip at the thought of her application not being considered "good enough" by the Pen's standards... She had discarded her previous application due to similar worries, and it was only natural that they should reoccur in the reptilian Elder's extended absence... Autumn Sun's thoughts are suddenly interrupted as she hears the shuffling of feet directly outside the office door. Quickly perking up, the excited applicant makes sure she looks presentable as a large figure hobbles into the room. The form moves forward a few steps before noticing the slim girl seated in an office chair and stopping abruptly. The large figure grunts and Autumn Sun frowns as she notices that he doesn't sport the scales commonly associated with Wyvern, but rather a large mane of white fur... Squinting in order to get a broader glimpse of the figure that stands before her, Autumn Sun shrieks as she notices he has the form of a large beast covered in fur, with razor sharp fangs and claws along with exceptionally large feet. Suddenly associating the beast with a picture in a book she had read on urban folklore, the startled applicant's eyes widen and she stutters: "Y-y-you're the abominable... t-the sno-... b-b-b-big fo-... Sasquatch!" The Sasquatch jumps upon hearing his name and the beast's face remains expressionless as he quickly glances left and right for an escape route of some sort. Obviously frightened by Autumn Sun's revelation, the giant monster turns to run away as fast as he can but ends up lumbering into a wall due to his large shape and awkward movements. As the beast crashes into the wall, short, repetitive growls begin to be emitted from it's throat and Autumn Sun screams as she suddenly notices that Wyvern's head was stuck inside the monster's jaws! After screaming like this for a few minutes, the horrified applicant slowly calms down as she begins noticing that things were not quite as they seemed... For one thing, Sasquatch wouldn't appear in the Pen's climate since he was associated with freezing temperatures... Besides, the "repetitive growl" was beginning to sound more and more like a broken tape deck. Autumn Sun's suspicions are quickly answered as a scaly tail suddenly pokes out of the back side of the beast's fur... The jaws of Sasquatch fall limp around Wyvern's supposedly hidden face as the lizard's costume becomes undone... Ditching his Sasquatch disguise, Wyvern quickly shakes Autumn Sun's hands and whispers a few apologies, swiftly placing a scaly finger on his lips to imply silence. Stamping the applicant's story ACCEPTED, the overgrown lizard hisses: "Pleassse don't tell anyone about this incident... dressing up as the abominable snowman was the only way I could scare off Melba from the Office for a few days. He's one of her distant relatives, after all..." Having said this, Wyvern points to a photo depiciting Melba and a number of her relatives, one of which is the abominable snowman... OOC: An original and ACCEPTED application story, Autumn Sun. Welcome to the Mighty Pen! Be sure to post your e-mail address here or send me a mail at elitwack90@hotmail.com so I can get you some more info...

Valdar, My apologies, I didn't want to take over your brilliant project by any means. You're definitely the mastermind in charge here, I just wanted to try and be helpful in some way... I now see that posting the whole "random option" thingy was inconsiderate of me, and I'll get rid of it. Looking forward to the next update! Wyv~

"Monty Python's Life of Brian" is definitely appreciated... I saw it a while back, but highlights in my mind include the singing at the end, the feminine rights activist, and the wonderfully random alien encounter scene. Brian's theme song was hilarious as well... In my opinion, "The Meaning of Life" might be Monty Python's crowning film achievement... "Get me the machine that goes 'beep!'" There are still certain episodes of the television series that may rival it, though... Did anyone ever see the "Hiding from Landmines" or "Hunting for Mosquitos" skits? Classic stuff... Cool topic Vincent, the Monty Python crew are definitely comedic geniouses. ;-)

Wyvern briefly notes to Tass that "Sorciere" translates to "Sorceress" from French (as opposed to "Sorcery") and confirms Falcon's notion that the avatar is a pic of "Frozen Shade" from "Magic: the Gathering" before extending a scaly claw in greeting to the new honored guest: "Welcome, Sorciere! I'm glad you decided to register and are enjoying the works here... I liked your lighthearted "Shopping Cart" poem and look forward to reading more stuff from you." Having said this, Wyvern twiddles his scaly fingers a bit and whistles innocently, swaying his tail back and forth and nervously scratching at the ground with one of his clawed toes. "Ssssssay..." hisses the overgrown lizard after a long silence "I don't suppose that as a sorceress you'd have any nifty spells like "Cause Volcanic Eruption of Geld" or "Summon Master Alchemist" or something along those lines...?" Sorciere considers for a moment, then shakes her head, having never heard of those spells... mainly due to the fact that they were non-existant. "Blast!" curses Wyvern under his breath as he slowly exits the Cabaret Room "I swear... the head wizards in charge need to make a field of magic concentrated around gelding!"

Wyvern swiftly strides into the Cabaret Room and greets Deviance, pouring him a free mug of Bruteweiser booze from the Endless Decanter and firmly shaking the new visitor's right hand. Grinning and winking to the guest, Wyv gleefully hisses: "Greetings, Deviance, and welcome to the Mighty Pen. I'm glad you found us and hope you'll enjoy writing here. I really like the clever title to this entrance thread, by the way... at first I thought it was a simple typo, but now I realize that the spelling of "devine" is quite deliberate. ;-) I also enjoyed your poem 'A Radiance to Find' in the Banquet Hall, and will be certain to comment on it sometime in the near future..." Wyvern takes a brief sip from the Endless Decanter, then continues... "As for myself, the name's Wyvern and I'm somewhat notorious for my deviant gelding schemes. ;-) I'm also the Elder of Initiates, so if you're thinking of applying to the guild and becoming a serious member, I'll be looking over your application in the Recruiter's Office..." Having said this, Wyvern gives Deviance another scaly handshake before rushing off to cause some "Wyvine Interventions" in the world of geld...

Matteo patiently taps his foot and leans back in his applicant easychair, wondering how much longer the overgrown lizard would take to arrive but well prepared for a long wait having experienced the acceptance process of the Elder of Initiates first hand previously... The Quill Bearer/applicant hums merrily to himself as he finishes the first quarter of the Complete Works of Shakespeare which he brought along to the office as reading material, carefully patting his bag containing the Complete Works of Milton and A Brief Summary of the English Language in 130 Volumes which he had brought in case the greedy lizard was out on one of his extended "lunch breaks." Laughing at a particularly funny passage from Twelth Night, the Pen member's reading is suddenly cut short as the Office door slams open and Wyvern comes storming in... Striding passed Matteo and not immediatly noticing the seated applicant, Wyvern grumbles a long stream of curses as he tears several wet maps that he holds to pieces. After he's finished this, the lizard tosses the remains into a nearby, overflowing trash bin and brushes off some of the wetness from his clothes. Suddenly noticing the old/new applicant seated in one of the Office easychairs, the reptilian Elder turns and extends a scaly claw in greeting. "Hi there! Apologies for the wait... I was out searching for this place called the Crystal Ti-" The overgrown lizard suddenly stops and his eyes widen as he notices that Matteo bears the familiar visage of the venerable Pen member Foe Calibur. The applicant *gulps* as an evil grin spreads across Wyvern's face and the lizard points a scaly finger at the name written on top of the application: "Fooooooooe Caaaaaalibuuuur!" exclaims the lizard happily. "Long time no see... I notice a name change has taken place, most interesting... What a coincidence, I was just out searching for those wealthy sounding Crystal Tides you had informed me of earlier. Unfortunately, I've only found these so far..." With that, Wyvern hands Matteo several faded photographs... one of them is a picture of a completely normal woodland stream labeled "Small Grey Rock Tides", another is a picture of a city fountain labeled "Insignificant Copper Tides", and the final photo is one of a pond next to a nuclear power plant labeled "Plutonium Tides"... Matteo clears his throat a bit and sets the photos aside, noting that the overgrown lizard hadn't gotten any better at scheming in his absence... in fact, it seemed that Wyvern had yet to discover that the Crystal Tides was the name of a previous guild rather than an actual physical location... "You'll have to further inform of its location sometime..." hisses the greedy lizard sinisterly. "For now, this is an excellent poem, not to mention an excellent explanation of why there's so much steamy chocolate mud wrestling and a Den of Iniquity in AoA... Lunatics equal lovers indeed... Certainly an ACCEPTED application, though since you're already a member here you have been reinstated to your previous rank of Quill Bearer. Merci pour cette piece excellente quand meme!" OOC: Welcome back Foe! Apologies for the lateness in responding, it's certainly great to have you back writing with us. As I said in my response, this definitely counts as an ACCEPTED application, though since you were a member previously you automatically regain your old rank. Once again, welcome!

As others have said, Finnius, this was a very entertaining story. Just got around to reading it, and it amused me greatly the whole way through. Your uses of character and history manipulation remain excellent... Having said this, Wyvern downs two packs of Mentos, three packs of breath mints, and gargles some mouth wash in the hopes of getting the ever-present taste of blood out of his mouth. The lizard also curses that noone was around to photograph him on the rare occasion when he looked intimidating, and extends a scaly palm towards Finnius in the hopes of recieving those withstanding dues... ;-)

Zool's Day Out Part 2: Wyvern's Cooking Fraud Wyvern ducks with a grin, watching the shoe barely miss his head while thinking "a feisty woman with good aim... Could be worse... Could be several feisty women with good aim. Wait a minute... what the heck am I talking about?! Several feisty women giving me attention would be a good thing! Could be worse... could be something inhuman, like Melba or the I.R.S..." Wyvern's thoughts are interrupted as a frying pan goes sailing directly into his face, emitting a metallic *clang!* upon impact and causing an almost dragonic dent to become embedded on the back of the cooking utensil. As the overgrown lizard collapses in a corner next to a quaint french cafe' table, his assailant lets out a cry of victory. Happy about her good aim with the frying pan, Lady Celes Crusador briefly frowns and turns once again towards the havoc that Wyvern had started in her cafe'... The greedy reptile had raided several of her cupards of pre-packed lunches in his creation of Zool's picnic snack, and had tried to pass them off as his own in the hopes of Zool praising him as a good chef... Celes supposed that the lizard ultimately wanted to be featured in a cooking magasine and get profits from it, but now she had found him out! Sighing distressed, she thinks "That MUST happen again" as she turns to the form of the overgrown lizard and notices the impact by which the frying pan had hit his face. As Wyvern slowly gets to his feet and desperatly tries to dislodge the frying pan from his face, Celes races to find more projectiles to aim at the greedy lizard. Managing to remove the frying pan from his visage, Wyv quickly takes Celes' lost shoe hostage in the hopes of calming the excellent Pen chef down. Holding the shoe above a nearby trash disposal grinder, Wyvern points to Celes and exclaims: "Not one move, or the shoe goes down the tube!" Celes Crusador suddenly stops her search for projectiles and grumbles curses under her breath. "Th-there must be some sort of misunderstanding..." exclaims Wyvern "... I mean, it's true that I tried to take some of your supplies without paying for them, but I did give the credit where it was due!" Elsewhere, within a certain Pen picture frame, Zool suddenly realizes that the napkin he had been using contains writing stating that the meal he had lost wasn't cooked by Wyvern, but rather by Celes... This saddens Zool even further for the loss of his meal, as he knew Celes as the better chef and Wyvern as... well... as the dolt responsible for the Macoroni Dinner Applicant Incedent.* Pondering the greedy lizard's statement, Celes agrees to allow Wyvern to depart from the cafe' as long as she gets her missing shoe back. The reptilian Elder grins and tosses the Troubador her lost shoe as he swiftly departs from the cafe'... Celes grumbles as she listens to the lizard's evil cackles as he rushes out into the Hall, making note to charge the greedy Elder for the lost supplies later. Sighing relieved, she thinks "That must NEVER happen again" as she crosses off "shoes" from her list of "potential Anti-Wyvern projectiles..." ;-p

Wyvern adds his own "Congratulations!" to Cyril's ever-growing pile of friendly cheers, grinning and giving the Quill-Bearer two big thumbs for the well-deserved achievement. Pondering Yui's advice, Wyvern considers forming a list of gelding questions to ask the knowledgable member as he exits... Best wishes Cyril, 'tis excellent news indeed!

Wyvern snatches Shadow of the Butterfly's application from his desktop, propping his scaly legs onto the vast ocean of paperwork located there and casually looking over the poem while taking short sips of booze from his Endless Decanter... Turning the application sheet over and shaking it a bit, the overgrown lizard mumbles something about a lack of geld donations when he suddenly notices that the sheet has been kissed for good luck, which more than makes up for the previous disappointment. Wiping off his now-bloody nose with a spare, unpaid tax bill, the overgrown lizard notes that the poem shows definite talent as well. Besides... anyone who could make Wyvern look more rediculous then he already was had to have talent... Humming to the tune of "Banquet Hall Blues" by the ill-fated, Archmage quartet known as the Racoulettes, Wyvern reaches for his Acceptance Stamp and is about to use it on Shadow of the Butterfly's application when an evil thought suddenly occurs to him. This evil thought is accompanied by a string of even-more-evil thoughts, which eventually developes into a tangled web of twisted schemes. Wyvern grins sinisterly, setting his Acceptance Stamp to the side and rubbing his scaly palms together in anticipation... Signalling to Melba, who was sitting in the opposite corner of the room and was clearly irritated by the sight of the overgrown lizard's villanous smile, Wyvern innocently chimes: "Melba... could you please fetch Shadow of the Butterfly and bring her back to the Recruiter's Office? There's a thing or two I'd like to discuss with her..." Melba frowns, unaccustomed to hearing words like "please" from the reptilian Elder... Deeply disturbed by this, the Almost Secretary is about to refuse his demands for the sake of safety when suddenly, a popping sound is heard directly outside the Office door and Shadow of the Butterfly swiftly enters into the room. Rushing up to Wyvern's desk, the eager applicant exclaims: "What would you like to discuss, Mr. Wyvern? Did you like my application? Is it accepted?!" Wyvern chuckles softly and hisses: "Almossst, Shadow, almost... first, I wanted to discuss a few ways you might be able to help me make some profits..." Shadow of the Butterfly stares blankly and Melba grits her teeth as Wyvern takes out a long list from one of his desk drawers... "Let's see here..." mumbles the overgrown lizard while grinning broadly "... one option would be for you to act as a beauty product for the Pen's official Shadow, Yui Temai. After all, I'm certain a shadow of a butterfly would look good in her hair... We'd charge you at only the steepest prices, of course..." "Errrrrr..." starts Shadow of the Butterfly in a mixture of anxiety and anger "... since when am I a product?!" Noticing this change of tone, Wyvern quickly crosses out the first option from his list and reads off the next one: "A rich collector of rare butterflies is looking for any distinctive species available... hmmm... it says here "to be nailed in a book," but actually I think that bit's optional..." Suddenly realizing that both Shadow of the Butterfly and Melba are gazing at him furiously, Wyvern quickly stamps Shadow's application ACCEPTED before being slapped by the applicant for mentioning nailed butterflies and clobbered by Melba by means of the Anti-Wyvern Mallet... ;-) OOC: On a more serious note, an ACCEPTED application Shadow of the Butterfly, welcome to the Mighty Pen! Both of your application poems were well written and acceptable... I chose to respond to this one simply because of the additional butterfly elements. Apologies for the long wait in receiving a response, and welcome once again! By the way, out of curiousity... is that a Masakazu Katsura pic in your sig?

Wyvern nods and points to Gwai's comment once again... I'll still be frequently posting on the boards as well... just lack chat programs until the end of the Summer. Having said this, Wyvern quickly licks up popcorn from where it's fallen on the ground, not wanting to waste a potential snack...

I'd certainly be interested in participating in this as well, though perhaps I could act as a solution to the second issue that Valdar brought up. If there's an even number of people participating and everyone has been paired with a partner, I'll sit this one out and participate in the next one (if there ends up being another)... If there's an odd number of people and someone is left without a partner in the circle, I'll gladly jump in and join them. Having said this, Wyvern downs a shot of Bruteweiser and notes for people to PM him to inform him of any list info he needs to create, since he's rather slow when it comes to instructions...

Wyvern whimpers and sympathizes, noting that he's in the same situation... Like Gwai, it's highly unlikely that I'll have any chat programs available over the Summer... Also like Gwai, PMing or e-mailing would be the best way to get in touch with me if you'd like to chat. I also might check around the Shoutbox occasionaly... Having said this, Wyvern procedes to organize his posting plans, noting the many awesome threads there are to respond to...

"As others have said, congratulations to all!" Upon exclaiming this, Wyvern hands out Bruteweiser™ booze in small paper cups which have Almost Dragonic Product™ advertisements drawn on them, carefully placing pink umbrellas in those of the newly promoted Pen members. Briefly toasting to the prosperity of the Pen with his "Almost Dragonic Deliberatly Disfunctional Alarm Clock Advertisement" paper cup, the greedy lizard swiftly crosses out May 13th from a large Pen calender he holds and puts a red circle around the date of July 13th... Bowing and departing from the Cabaret Room, Wyvern passes by a gloomy Damon Inferel and briefly stops to hiss: "Apologies for the name confusion... my almost dragonic handwriting can often come off as quite sloppy and illegible... In fact, I'm surprised that any of the name spellings were correctly deciphered!" Snickering to himself and patting Damon on the back, the reptilian Elder whips out a book entitled Pen Rankings and Using Member Income Taxes to Your Advantage before cackling evilly and dashing out of the packed Hall...

I haven't checked out the sentences yet, but my numbers'll be: Nine, the opposite of One, One.

Underneath the gigantic chunk of ice lies the mangled form of the thing that went "CRUNCH," its almost-dragonic tail sticking out slightly on the ground next to where the glacial object rests. In an immense amount of pain but still capable of mumbling a few words, the figure underneath the hail chunk attempts to cast a heat spell in the hopes of thawing some ice, but accidently mutters the incantation to "Summon Jack Frost" instead. Upon arriving on the scene, the legendary bringer of cold is discouraged to see that not much can be done to make things any more freezing around where the glacier rests, and decides to head into the party to order some drinks on the rocks... As Jack Frost enters into the halls of the Cabaret Room, Courteousy the Elder Dwarf arrives at the site of the ice chunk and decides that the only polite thing to do would be to chisel the overgrown lizard out of it. After spending a few hours working feverishly at the giant chunk of hail, the Polite Elder Dwarf finally succeeds at removing Wyvern from its depths. Thanking Courteousy for his help and intensely shivering while chattering his teeth for a good ten minutes, the reptilian Elder slowly regains his composure. The greedy lizard sports a casual T-shirt on which there is written "Party Crasher" with a picture of a certain Conservatory in ruins underneath it... Upon catching a glimpse of Gyrfalcon in the Cabaret Room, however, Wyv quickly tosses on a "Gyrfalcon the Movie" sweatshirt over it in the hopes of not reminding anyone of any withstanding debts... Entering into the party and practically tripping over the remains of a magic barrier in the process, Wyvern whips out the Decanter of Endless Booze and exclaims: "Happy birthday Ozymandias! Ice cold Bruteweiser™ for all of the Pen!" With that, the lizard strikes a corny John Travolta-esque "Saturday Night Fever" pose... only to find that his limbs are now stuck in that position due to their still being slightly frozen. "... argh... this is causing one hellova cramp... someone unstick me, please...?"

Wyvern swiftly dashes into the Cabaret Room, briefly bowing to those who have gathered and tossing a large sack that he carries onto the ground by his feet. Opening the bag and rummaging through it's contents, the overgrown lizard pulls out a variety of eccentric objects and turns towards the four birthday girls, approaching each in turn. Tzim is handed a voucher for a nude beach holiday, Rydia is bestowed a few boxes of aluminum foil, Minta is given additional pixie stick "pointy ear" and "tail" add-ons for Elladan's skellie, and Rosemary is offered a simple card on which the cryptic phrase "Date to birth, express happiness to mirth" has been written. Wyvern salutes the four collectively before quickly departing from the room, not wanting to risk the arrival of the credit companies when they discover his scams... OOC: Happy Birthday Quincunx! ;-)

Psimon, I recently read through a number of your poems in the hopes of helping you decide which to choose for the Poetry Contest you're thinking of entering, and must say that I find them excellent overall... Many interesting themes and topics are touched upon, and some vivid imagery is evoked throughout. I notice that the structure you generally use for your poems is to divide them into several stanzas and follow a 'ABAC DEFE'-type rhyme scheme, which often works very well. The themes dealt with range from nostalgic reminiscences of relationships passed to tales of black dragons and evocative imagery. An interesting trend I noticed is that, while your rhymes and rhythm are perfect when incorporated into your poems dealing with general imagery and stories, they can occasionally come off as a bit forced when trying to get specific themes across. Two good examples of poems of yours that have incredible rhymes and rhythm are "Tornado" and "Around the World," while poems such as "The Thin Wall" and "What?" are slightly less rhythmic, yet are backed by more powerfull themes and messages. Having said this, I really appreciate both types of poems, each for their positive qualities. My favorite of the poems that I've read from you thus far, however, would have to be the freeform "Unititled #0010," which I found strikingly beautiful and which is one of the best freeform poems I've read in a while. I recommend everyone to check this one out... My 5 favorites would probably be: 1) "Untitled #0010" 2) "Tornado" (I love the rhythm of this) 3) "Gone..." 4) "Desert Rose" 5) "Dark Clouds" Once again, great stuff... I look forward to reading more of your works!

Wyvern bows humbly to both Smallscale Mind Games and Alaeha, then whimpers: My apologies for the gender confusion... come to think of it, looking back at my older application responses, a good 70% of them have the genders confused... ;p Somehow, it ends up being a reoccuring error on my part... though I suppose one could argue that it ultimately adds to the incohesive and chaotic nature of the responses... Wyvern bashes his head against his desk a few times, briefly apologizes once again, and dashes off to find some cheap profits...

Troubled Sleep grumbles to herself as she leans back in her applicant easychair, impatiently awaiting the arrival of the reptilian Elder of Initiates. Melba, the Almost-Secretary of Initiates, paces back and forth through the office restlessly, equally angered at the overgrown lizard's long absence. Turning towards Troubled Sleep and gazing at her in pity, Melba clears her throat a few times, then speaks up in an extremely high-pitched, helium-filled voice: "That damned lizard is extremely late again... and my voice hasn't recovered yet from biting into his giant peach balloon! Ugh, that wanna-be-dragon is evil in so many manners..." As if on cue, at the mentioning of the word "evil", Wyvern suddenly strides into the office through the front entrance. Pausing for a moment and cringing in distaste at the word "manners", the overgrown lizard guzzles some Bruteweiser Booze ™ and belches a few flames before seating himself at his desk. Brushing aside numerous leftover AoA candy wrappers and money graphs from his workplace, the greedy Elder snatches up Troubled Sleep's application story and procedes to read over it a few times. After having finished, the sinister lizard turns towards the eager application, grins, and hisses: "Ahhhh yesssss... your story evokes the fondest memories of one of my numerous schemes, though the recollections turn sour when the scheme fails miserably." "Scheme...?" questions Troubled Sleep curiously, picking up her application sheet from where Wyvern had left it and skimming over it to affirm the notion that she hadn't brought up any schemes in her story... "Well..." responds Wyvern "... the entire Y2K warning was actually one of my many failed plots. I had wanted everyone to go for broke and buy all of the supplies they could from me before it hit, but for some reason I didn't take product competitors into consideration..." Wyvern sighs for a moment, then swiftly brightens up and flashes an evil grin. "But this time, I won't lose! I've stolen a special vial of Y05/09/03K Virus straight from the laboratory of Doctor Evil, which should take effect on the date specified should I choose to unleash it! I'll bring the world to it's knees!" "Ummm, Wyvern..." interrupts Troubled Sleep thoughtfully "... if it's supposed to be a computer virus, how can it come in a vial?" Wyvern's facial expression goes blank and he stares at the vial for a moment, hesitantly noting that Troubled Sleep does have a point. Sighing to himself, the lizard stamps her application ACCEPTED before mumbling: "I wonder what this vial is used for, then...?" ... Several hundred miles below the Pen's surface, in the fashionably designed Super Top Secret Evil Headquarters of Doctor Evil ™, the villainous Doctor notices that the vial containing his formula comprised of 5 drops of maliciousness, 9 drops of evil, and 3 drops of politeness is missing, rendering his plans of creating an army of evil Peredhil clones and overrunning the Polite Magi obsolete... ;-p OOC: An ACCEPTED application, Troubled Sleep, welcome to the Mighty Pen! My apologies for the lateness in responding, your story was well written and entertaining... Be sure to either post your e-mail address here or mail me at elitwack90@hotmail.com, so I can send you some additional info. Once again, welcome!

By the way, just to clarify things for those who I haven't revealed this to yet, the play on famous sayings in my little story is: "Do U.Nto Others as Others would do unto 'U'" ;p